Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer Page #4

Who are you?

Oh, I better get you medical attention.

Quincy!

Leave a note explaining what happened.

So, of course, she was welcome to stay

at the North Pole until she felt better.

Weve got great medical care

every therapy and treatment imaginable

at no ho-ho-ho! cost.

Thanks for straightening out this

whole mess, Santa.

Im eager to see grandma and tell her

the sale is off.

Sure glad everything worked out okay.

I Im sorry.

I had to chase the reindeer.

I was gone for a minute.

She wandered off.

Who?

Grandma!

We couldnt find her anywhere.

Shes missing again.

Since grandma is nowhere to be found

and the man in the red suit here

admitted he ran over her

I demand that you have Santa arrested

for the disappearance of grandma.

No!

The news that Santa had been arrested for

the disappearance of grandma was a shock,

especially to Mrs. Claus.

Santas been arrested!

I shouldnt say everyone was shocked

because cousin Mel and her partner in crime

Ms. Slime, sure werent.

Here.

Lucky a thing she still has a case of

amnesia and doesnt know who you are.

Lucky is right but we cant keep her

locked up in here forever.

Wont need to.

We just need to keep her out of sight

long enough

for the jury to find Santa Claus

guilty of her disappearance.

And then we sue him for all that money.

Think of it:
Santas found guilty,

we win the worlds most famous

case of hit-and-run.

Santa Claus must be worth a fortune,

considering he supplies gifts

to everyone in the world.

Thats 2.5 billion times.

What do you think he spends on average

per person? $10, $15?

Even if its just five

your share, as grandpas financial

advisor, is

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

thats what grandpas gonna do

thats what grandpas gonna do.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa

cause grandma wouldve wanted him to.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

he knows the law is on his side.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

Santas going for a ride.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

thats what grandpas gonna do.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa

cause grandma wouldve wanted him to.

No pantalones.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

he knows the law is on his side.

Grandpas gonna sue the pants off of Santa,

Santas going for a ride.

Santas going for a ride.

Santas going for a ride.

Im at the courthouse where the sensational

Santa Claus trial is reaching its climax.

Its already December and after weeks

of testimony by several witnesses

three questions remain:

Did Santas reindeer run over grandma?

Where is she now?

And without Santa Claus,

will there be a Christmas?

District attorney Hartung is making

his impassioned summation.

And so, in closing do I want to see

Santa Claus go to jail?

Personally, no,

but I represent the state and must do my job.

The evidence proves Santa Claus is

responsible for grandmas disappearance.

So if the beard fits, you must convict.

If he goes to jail,

it will be the end of Christmas.

What can I do, grandpa?

Find grandma again.

Maybe she didnt wander off.

But everyone loves grandma.

Who would do such a thing?

Cousin Mel!

Hey, boy, whatcha smell?

Grandma?

Jake, get that mutt away from my backpack.

Sure, cousin Mel.

Okay, Doofus,

do your smell thing.

Keep it up, Doofus.

So thats where she was going.

Wont be too much longer, grandma.

The jury is about to find your friend

in the red suit guilty.

And who would that be?

You still dont remember a thing, do you?

My plan is going to work.

Im going to be wealthy

and theres no one who can stop me.

Hello, inside!

Who can that be way out here?

How should I know?

I dont even know who I am.

If thats your car parked down by the road

you better check it out.

Some bears are hanging around it.

Thank you! I was leaving anyway!

Okay, but dont take too long.

Have a safe, fire-free day.

Good job!

I came as soon as I received your e-mail,

Master Jake.

Now what do you have up your sleeve

to get me inside?

Nice entrance!

Whats your name again?

Jake Spankenheimer.

Your grandson.

Doesnt ring a bell but thanks, anyway.

Dont thank me, thank Doofus.

And I suppose this overexcited

pooch is Doofus.

Grandma, I dont have a lot of time

to explain but were going to the store.

Whats at the store?

Your memory.

This is Spankenheimers, remember?

Your elf costume?

Youd wear it to read to the kids

while their parents were shopping.

I cant believe it.

You remember!

No, that I would wear that shade of green

with my coloring.

Easy for you to say.

Tell me again why Im baking two cakes?

Ones with your recipe,

the other uses the stuff in the vial

I found at cousin Mels cabin.

And this is your famous homemade fruitcake

that, uh, a lot of people liked.

Jake, what am I doing here?

Grandma, you remember!

Oh, yeah.

You lost your memory, but now its back.

It felt like I was in a dream.

And you were in it, and Santa Claus,

and Mrs. Claus.

I thought I was in a , only it was cold.

But if everything you told me is true,

why arent we at the courthouse

to prove that Im okay?

Were on our way.

Has the jury reached a verdict?

Yes, we have, Your Honor.

In the matter of the State v. Santa Claus

we, the Jury, find

Stop!

Santa is innocent.

Im grandma, and Im not missing.

Im right here.

That woman is a fraud.

Grandma doesnt know who she is.

Honeybunches! Grandma!

Order in the court!

Since grandma isnt missing

I hereby rule that Santa Claus is innocent

of causing her disappearance.

Your honor,

there are still the charges of

sleighicular hit-and-run

and leaving the scene of an accident.

I can answer that, Your Honor. If you

and the Jury would taste this fruitcake.

No, dont!

She objects.

Overruled. Continue.

This one was made by grandma

using her special ingredients.

Taste it and then compare it

to the pieces of cake

found at the scene of the alleged crime

states evidence #12.

Do we have to, Your Honor?

Good question.

Do we have to?

Yes, I think youll find a difference

between the two.

All right, in the name of justice,

we eat fruitcake.

Now taste states evidence #12

found where grandma disappeared.

So, whats your point?

These pieces had an extra ingredient in them

from this vial of bad stuff found

at cousin Mels cabin.

You see, Your Honor,

it had the effect of reindeer nip.

Thats why the reindeer knocked over

grandma.

It wasnt Santas reckless driving.

I, uh, couldnt control myself.

The boy has done it again.

I rule that Santa is also innocent

of the hit-and-run charge.

And I suppose Jake has an answer to the

charge of leaving the scene of an accident

sleighicular negligence?

Doofus does.

Hes my dog.

What? I object.

Lets have it.

This is a note Santa left at the

accident scene explaining everything.

Dust it for fingerprints.

All right, I admit it.

Yes, yes, I did it.

I hid the note.

And?

And I made grandpa sign over his rights

to the store.

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