Grandview U.S.A.
- R
- Year:
- 1984
- 97 min
- 170 Views
Don't you ever do that again.
Remember the lever
on the steering column, move it,
you can put the wheel
wherever you want.
But don't move it while you're driving.
Okay, Dad. Dad, I'm gonna be late.
Square one's for the ignition,
round one's for the trunk
and don't forget to lock it.
Tim, I forgot to tell you.
Last button on the arm,
that locks up all the windows
and the doors.
And, uh, look, don't put any scratches
on the car, okay?
- Uh, drive carefully.
- Please fasten your seatbelt.
I love you.
Kiss me.
- Chris.
- That's a real honey of a car.
Mom.
You'll be driving a Cadillac yourself
one of these days.
- Please.
- Yeah, we'll see.
Hi, Tim.
Goodness,
what a fine-looking couple you are.
You look like you just stepped off
of a wedding cake.
Just one more, just one more.
Oh, it just gives me goosebumps
looking at the two of you.
Oh, sorry, Bonnie.
Please fasten your seatbelt.
Ugh. Damn it.
You just hold on, it'll work.
Here, give me the pliers.
- Ow, Mom.
- What'd I tell you about that gum?
- I don't know, what?
- I said, no more gum.
You got that?
Sick of you gnawing on that,
not being hungry at supper time.
- That's not so.
- Wait a minute, fella.
You just go on. Get out of here.
Go on, vamoose.
Find anything, Mr. Hurlbuck?
Yes, ma'am, a few things.
Yeah, like what?
Like smoking in a food service area.
This is The Moose,
feeling, oh, so mellow and loose.
So put your arms around
your favorite memory
and hold it close.
Dancing the night away.
Let's go for a drive.
- Hey, how you doing?
- How you doing?
You got 30 days to comply
and bring these violations up to code.
You write me up on everything
but the color of the toilet paper,
expect me to fix it
in 30 days?
If you need more time,
you'll have to appeal
to the county commissioners.
How come all of a sudden
you're out here nosing around?
- Just doing my job.
- Yeah?
You tell the boys
at the county commission
I said you did a real good job too.
You ought to get smart
Hey, Slam, how you been?
Who was that?
Just more trouble.
Thanks.
- Mm, Bonnie
- Oh, Tim.
- Bulls.
- Tin.
- Are we moving?
- Everything is moving.
Bonnie, the whole car is moving.
- Oh, no. No.
- Tim, what's happening?
- Damn, the car is sinking.
- Huh?
- Please fasten your seatbelt.
- Do something.
Oh, God.
Come on, come on.
Dear God.
This is really mature, Tim.
- Holy sh*t.
- Don't forget your keys.
Tim, where you going?
- I gotta go get some help.
- What about me?
You're not gonna leave me here,
are you?
Okay, okay.
Come on.
Please don't get mud on my dress.
Hold on. Whoa.
My father's going to kill me.
No, my father's gonna kill you.
- I lost my shoe.
- Tim.
- Damn it, I lost my shoe.
- Forget the shoe.
You dorkwipe.
Found my shoe.
This is so mature.
This is ridiculous. Oh, my God.
Look at my dress, it's wrecked.
Destroyed.
And my panty hose,
look at my panty hose.
Bonnie, can it.
- Where are we going?
- Getting a tow truck.
- Here?
- You wanna walk two miles into town?
Go right ahead, knock yourself out.
Why are you treating me like this?
What have I done?
- You're acting like a pig.
- Bonnie, I'm warning you, can it.
Okay, fine.
I'll just call my father then.
Fine, go ahead and call him.
Sh*t. Give me a break.
He does have the advantage.
That's right.
A lot of his fans are booing him,
they must love him.
Excuse me.
And behind him, Adam Bomb.
Jesus H. Casper the Ghost.
What the hell happened to you?
Had car trouble.
I'm looking for a tow truck.
Looks like you need a car wash.
He's loaded for action, ready to fire.
We got a tow truck,
but you'll have to talk to Mike first.
- Where's Mike?
- Inside, watching the derby.
Is it okay if I go in?
Sure, honey, for 3 bucks,
anybody can go in.
Heck of a show.
Lots of blood and heavy metal.
Forget it. Go on in.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
And here come
the two Banzai Brothers.
Where's Mike Cody?
Up there.
Maybe we'll see some of that tonight.
- Ha, ha.
- And behind him...
- I'm looking for Mike Cody.
- I'm Mike Cody, what do you want?
I need a tow truck.
What's wrong with your car?
It stalled in a stream.
Stalled in a stream?
Kind of half in and half out.
We're gonna have
one heck of a melee.
Damn.
- You got any money?
- How much?
- Twenty if I don't get wet, 30 if I do.
- Yeah, sure, whatever.
All right, gotta wait a minute.
Take a last look,
give a round of applause
one last time
before we start this race.
And here comes the favorite.
Slam Webster.
Slam "The Ram" Webster.
- Slam, Slam, Slam.
- Yeah.
Slam, Slam, Slam.
There's my favorite boy out there.
He's gonna do a real good job.
I'm glad you like him.
Uh-oh, here comes the one in black,
Darth Vader.
We're gonna start
Five, four, three, two, one.
And they're off. There they go.
I kind of like that Vader
with that there red car,
beautiful paint job.
He's gonna fly
the entire left side of the field.
Here comes Slam... Oh!
Adam Bomb wants some,
he's right in the middle.
- Oh, beautiful hit.
- Ha, ha.
Slam Webster,
ladies and gentlemen. Slam Webster.
Slam just hit them both,
knocking them both in a circle.
Beautiful hit.
Beautiful, that was so hard,
There goes one,
it's up and over into another car.
Slam's got Pink Slip in his sights.
- Oh! Beautiful hit from Slam Webster.
- Ha, ha.
Pink Slip is out of this race.
Two running cars on the track left.
And that is, of course,
Slam "The Ram" Webster
and the Chief of Police,
Darth Vader.
Slam doesn't see him,
he's coming from behind. Oh!
Slam didn't even see
that one coming, beautiful.
Out of the way. He made it.
Now, he's gonna finish him off.
- Bam! That is it, that is it.
- Ha, ha.
Beautiful hit from a backdoor driver.
Yeah, Slam!
The Force isn't with him
this evening.
The old Darth Vader, Tucker Smith,
bites the dust.
Start it up for the one and the only,
Slam "The Ram" Webster.
- Great, Slam.
- Attaboy.
Thank you, thank you,
don't applaud, throw money.
Slam!
And that's all for tonight here at...
That is it, Mike.
I am a human being, not a light bulb.
I'll be right back.
Whew! I think I know who you're
looking for, he's up there.
- Oh, no.
- That's my daughter.
Never again, Tim Pearson.
Never in one million,
trillion goddamn years.
It was an accident, Mr. Clark.
What kind of demented cabbage patch
- Look at her!
- Dad.
She looks like she was dragged
through a goddamned barnyard.
- Dad.
- Easy.
- Come on, lover boy.
- Come on, you son of a b-!
- Enough, mister.
This is between us, sweetheart
Look buddy, I'll give you 60 seconds
to get off my property
or I'll kick your tiny nuts
up your big fat ass.
Sorry, Tim.
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"Grandview U.S.A." Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 4 Jul 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/grandview_u.s.a._9273>.
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