Grandview U.S.A. Page #2

- Oh, boy.

- All right, let's go, missy.

I'm not gonna forget this, Pearson.

You too, sweetheart

You Roger Pearson's son?

Yeah.

Hey, hey.

Did I miss a good fight?

Wanna earn 30 bucks?

What did you have in mind?

Cut it out, give junior here a tow.

Man, I feel so stupid.

Well, boy, you just discovered

the oldest sexual position in the book.

What?

The foolish position.

I gotta pull over for a minute.

What you just gotta remember,

your brains are between your ears

and not your legs.

Hey, Slam.

Things a little rough

at the Speedrome tonight?

Yeah, ha, ha.

My friend here had a problem

out at County Line Bridge.

Oh. Out there baiting your hook, huh?

Catch anything?

Damn.

How's that gorgeous honey

of a wife of yours doing, huh?

- You tell me.

- Come again?

- She wasn't here tonight, was she?

- I don't wanna get messed up...

She wasn't here tonight,

was she, Mickey?

No.

I'll see you.

Hey, Mickey.

Slam?

Slam, that you?

No, it's a burglar.

It's late, baby.

So how did you do bowling tonight?

Claire beat me three times in a row.

Let's go to bed, baby.

Hey, thanks.

How did we do tonight?

Oh, you know.

Five, six, seven...

This ain't no way

to make a living anymore.

Watch it.

Looks like you had a rough night.

You look pretty lonely,

sitting there all beat up.

You don't have to worry about a thing.

I'm gonna take you to junk heaven.

Oh, my God.

It's not as bad as it looks, Dad.

A door is ajar.

You should've sold out, Michelle,

when your dad died.

Look, what if we just cut it in half?

- Five thousand?

- I'm sorry, Michelle, but it's business.

At this rate, you'll be out of business

by the end of the summer.

All your suppliers have

you on a cash basis.

- There is no...

- Thanks for your time, Mr. Fleming.

Hi.

- Hi.

- How are you today?

Fine.

Thanks for helping me out last night.

- It's okay.

- Really.

- Okay.

- I mean it.

Look, I'll see you.

That's a big thermometer.

Yup.

- You want it?

- No.

No, no, no, come on, take it.

They're giving them away free.

Great.

You know, I've always been interested

in the weather.

I bet.

Smooth, Pearson.

The weather?

Duh.

- Dad?

- I'll be right out.

February, 4720.

That's up a dollar three.

February pork bellies up 187

at 6127.

December five came up 47

at 6267.

Farm report is brought to you hourly

by Gordon Chemical.

Your one stop store

for an feed and fertilizer needs.

Back to our musical programming.

Dad, I'm sorry about your car.

You know, a father loaning his car,

his first Cadillac, to his son,

now, that's not just a father loaning

any car to his son.

That's a father loaning a symbol

of his success,

achievement and victories to his son

and saying:

"Here, you take this Cadillac

and you drive it proudly

up the road of your dreams."

But, for chrissake,

don't park the son of a b*tch

in the middle of a goddamn stream.

You understand what I'm getting at?

I think you're telling me you don't want

me to drive your Cadillac anymore.

I think we understand each other.

Damn it! You turd.

Thought you were gonna

swim to Bora Bora.

Ran out of air.

See any mermaids?

Just catfish.

And I'm so sick of catfish.

How am I gonna be

the next Jacques Cousteau

if I'm sitting in a cornfield?

Still haven't told

your old man yet, huh?

Gotta tell him you're gonna

turn down the scholarship.

Tell him in your valedictory address,

that would really fry his mind.

Ladies and gentlemen,

fellow students, distinguished guests.

Today is a very special day.

Today is a day unlike any other day.

Today is the day

where we wave hello with one hand

and wave goodbye

with the other hand.

Dinner's on the table.

Thank you, Dad.

- Looks good.

- Oh, thanks.

- What's wrong with you?

- Nothing.

What's wrong with you?

Nothing.

- I can't help it.

- Susan.

It's killing me, I can't help it.

The conversation is finished.

- What conversation?

- It's none of your business.

- Yeah, they're my b*obs.

- Susan.

What b*obs? You have b*obs?

Can it.

See, Mom, that's what I mean.

You can't even tell I have anything

with this dumb thing on.

- We wear bras in this family, period.

- We do?

- I said can it.

- It's canned, it's canned.

- Took me 13 years to grow them-

- Oh, my God.

Just when they stem to show,

I have to smash them down

with a bra?

Better smashed than flopping.

I wish they'd flop.

I'd pay a million dollars

if they'd just wiggle a little.

- Susan, I'm warning you.

- They're my b*obs, Mom.

- Breasts.

- Breast, boob, what's the difference?

- A lot in your case.

- Oh, sit on it.

- Susan.

- Tim.

All right.

The conversation is finished.

Some conversation.

I thought we'd have

a little get-together in the backyard

after the graduation exercises.

Oh, I don't wanna have a party.

Oh, sure you do.

Mom, I would really just like to-?

Oh, Dad, gross.

Excuse me.

MTV Music Television.

We've got your favorite

video music in stereo.

What are you guys doing here?

We just need a couple

of hundred thousand to tide us over.

All we've got left

is the condo in Bogot.

I'm busy, leave me alone.

You can't do this to us,

not after all the things

we've done for you.

- Yeah, Tim.

- Johnny, take care of them.

Beat it.

Stick them up.

You got any gum?

What?

You got any gum?

No, sorry.

Damn.

You work here?

Yup, me and my ma.

She sells the hot dogs,

takes the ticket money.

I drive the forklift, that's my job.

Nobody can do it but me.

If you wanna drive in the derby,

what do you gotta do?

Just put it in reverse, go like crazy.

Ka-bam!

That's it, huh?

Smash them up.

- Where do you get the cars?

- I got some back there.

I got a...

What do they call it?

The front of it

looks like a rocket ship.

Studebakers,

you know, Studebakers?

Yeah, sure.

Well, it's kind of a Studebaker,

it's got a Buick engine in it.

It's a "Stud-a-Buick."

Here comes the Stud-a-Buick.

They don't make them anymore.

All out.

- You want that one?

- How much you want-?

You can't sell my cars, Cowboy,

you know that.

- Yes, I can.

- No, you can't.

- Why not?

- Because they're mine, not yours.

They are too mine.

Look, just go back to the trailer

and I'll fix you supper.

I ain't hungry.

Just do what I say, go.

Now, go.

- Come here.

- What?

You got something in your ear.

Thanks, Mike.

I didn't mean to get him in any trouble.

You didn't.

What can I do for you?

- I wanna drive in the derby.

- Why?

I thought it'd be some fun,

that's all.

- You gotta be 18.

- No sweat, I turned 18 last month.

Look, some other time.

Does that mean no?

It means some other time.

If you don't take my word for it,

go ask your dad.

What does he have to do with it?

Go home.

Back, back. Reach, reach, reach.

Take it down, now stretch.

You gotta work that body every day.

Now, come on,

what are you waiting for?

Oh, hi.

- Dinner will be ready real soon.

- Hold it down, hands up.

Side, side, side, side,

side, side, side.

I must be adopted.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes