Grandview U.S.A. Page #4

That's why she's slipping and sliding

with a washing machine salesman?

Oh, jeez,

you are something else, woman.

I mean, she's young.

This guy, Danny or Dinky or Dipshit

or whatever the f*** his name is,

he's got her snowed over

with some act that she fell for.

- She doesn't know what she's doing.

- Bull.

You can't tell me

that I don't love her.

- You don't.

- Oh, goddamn it, Mike.

I love her.

She loves me, I mean...

I do things for her.

I shovel gravel five days a week

on some kidney-shaking machine

that gives me hemorrhoids

the size of watermelons.

Then you zip out here and spend every

minute away from her in the derby.

What am I supposed to do?

This place is the only thing

that makes me different

from almost everybody else.

I like to smash cars

and I am damn good at it.

You know,

you're telling the wrong woman.

You know, you shouldn't eat toast

with braces on your teeth.

Makes your mouth

look like a garbage disposal.

Looks like you're carrying

your lunch in there.

- God, you are so warped.

- Me?

You know, if puberty was a terminal

disease, you'd be the poster child?

- Go suck dead bicycle seats.

- Susan.

Are you on drugs?

What?

Whatever your problem is,

you better get yourself straight.

And, oh, by the way, don't forget,

you gotta wear a tie

and a jacket for the picture tonight.

What picture?

You got a brain up there

or a paperweight?

Dad, do I have to?

Yes, damn it, you have to.

I'm a county commissioner

and you're the class Valedictorian,

and we're gonna have our picture

taken whether you like it or not.

Yes, sir.

You better straighten out

that attitude of yours, mister,

or you and me

are gonna go to the mat.

If you don't realize,

I believe that the most important skill

you've acquired in this institution,

and I hope you have acquired it,

is the ability to communicate.

A language,

orally or the written word.

Dad!

- Go!

- Go, go!

No!

Tim.

Tim.

Sorry.

I was afraid you'd gone into a coma.

Hey, is he finished yet?

I don't know, I'm gonna go find out.

- I got your dress, Mike.

- Thanks, Cowboy.

- Are you going to a party?

- Mm-mm.

Going to county commission

meeting tonight.

- They gonna have ice cream there?

- No.

- They're not?

- Uh-uh.

I don't wanna go then.

Guess I have to go without you.

Guess so.

Put that in my trailer for me, okay?

- Hi, Slam.

- Hey, Cowboy, put them up.

- Mr. Kutch.

- Yo.

What do you say?

- For everything?

- Yup.

Including that pile of batteries

and tires back there?

- No, that's another deal.

- Hey there.

- Hi, Slam.

- How's it going?

Wait.

Look, I'm real busy right now.

- What's up?

- Uh...

I was just thinking that maybe

we could go out to dinner tonight.

I thought you were a married man.

Just dinner, that's all.

Getting even with Candy?

Damn it,

I'm not trying to get even,

I'm trying to ask you for a date.

You remember dates, don't you?

I never remember

you asking me for one.

This is going over

like a fad in church.

Say, 3000?

Three and a half.

Three and a half?

Hey look, I'll see you later, okay?

Look, Slam, I'd like to go.

Really, I'm just busy tonight.

Look, 3250

including the batteries and tires.

Three and a half with the tires

and batteries.

How about if we have a drink

after the derby tomorrow?

Yeah, sure, okay.

Yeah, if you want to.

- Okay.

- See you.

Three-and-a-half for everything,

including the batteries and tires?

Draw.

- Oh, you got me.

- I did?

Three and a half, take it or leave it.

I'll take it.

Okay.

That's the best you could do, huh?

Shirt tie, and jacket.

Yeah.

Dad, one of these days,

your stomach's gonna melt down.

It'll be like the China syndrome

and burn right through you.

Oh, that's a pleasant thought.

Dad, what would you think

if I didn't work for you this summer

- and I took some time off?

- Time off?

I need to do some things,

see some things.

Great, I'll sell the house,

we'll buy you a ticket

on the space shuttle.

- I'm being serious, Dad.

- Seriously disturbed.

I need to get away from here,

I need some time.

Let me tell you something.

Losers never have enough time,

winners have all the time in the world.

Oh, boy.

That makes you an exceptionally

high yield...

- Dad, listen to me-

- Oh, we're gonna be late.

Dad, I'm gonna turn down

that scholarship to ISU.

I wanna go to school in Florida

and study oceanography.

You what? Now you listen to me...

- Hey there...

- I got-

- Randy, how are you this evening?

- Evening. This'll just take a minute.

Let's step into the meeting hall.

I'll grab a few quick ones.

Who died, Tim?

Come on, let's have a smile.

That's it. Thank you, gentlemen.

Thank you, Randy. Our pleasure.

Once this meeting is over,

you and I are gonna sit down

and we're gonna get

our wires straight, you got it?

- I'll see you later.

- Wait a minute, hold on.

Here, go over to the office,

I got some Rolaids on the desk,

bring them over here, please.

Yes, sir.

Hi.

Where's Pete?

Did you hear from him?

Come on now. Sit down, Bill.

That's just another one of four

or five examples of, uh,

great potential

for personal injury.

And of course, the county would

be liable to lawsuit in those situations.

Guess that's just about all I've got.

Any questions?

Thank you, Larry.

Mike, Miss Cody, are there

any comments you'd like to make?

My dad built

the Speedrome in 1967,

and since then we've had our share

of cuts and bruises,

splinters and bumped heads,

but no more than any other business.

The only fatality we ever had

was when my dad died last year

of his head attack.

What I'm trying to get at

is that there's a big difference

between run-down and unsafe.

But I'll do whatever you want,

I just need the time.

I need time to raise the money

and do the repairs.

Now, I have some estimates here.

Well, in light of Mr. Hurlbuck's report

I myself have some difficulty

in seeing how we could go

about granting you more time.

Six months, just give me six months.

If I haven't done everything by then,

you can shut me down.

We're supposed to waive the interest

of the public safety for six months?

That would leave the county

in a tough position.

Look, can we cut the crap?

What's going on is you

wanna put me out of business.

Let's keep our hats on.

I move that we vote on the motion

before us.

All in favor of granting...

I don't quit so easy, Mr. Pearson,

you ought to know that by now.

Especially since you've had your eye

on my dad's property since he died.

My bags weren't unpacked,

his body wasn't cold yet

and you were on my doorstep

doing your Let's Make a Deal routine.

- I resent that, that has no bearing on-

- On what?

That you've managed to buy or option

every piece of property around me?

Now you'll either calm yourself

or I'll adjourn this meeting

and we'll vote on this in private.

Just tell me why you wanna

shut me down so damn bad,

you'd use this line of bullshit to do it.

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