Gremlins 2: The New Batch Page #5

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Please take a moment to locate

the nearest exit.

Go to it quickly because

of the danger in the building.

Please take personal belongings

with you.

Take care not to step on

any of the people...

... attempting to leave the building.

Food fight! Food fight! Food fight!

Fire:
The untamed element, giver

of warmth, destroyer of forests.

- This building is on fire.

- What?

The building is on fire.

Leave the building.

Enact the age-old drama

of self-preservation.

Oh, Murray, the cathedral

of Saint Eva Marie.

- What a beautiful building!

- Beautiful?

It's like something

out of the Dark Ages.

Hey, Quasimodo, you home?

Hey...

- It's one of them!

- Who?

Get off!

It's just a flesh wound, Murray!

- Hurry up, Lewis!

- I'm coming, Martin!

The horror. The horror. The breakage!

Sir, what happened?

They fought back,

that's what happened.

Things.

Stuff.

I swear, I'll never hurt

anything again.

Some things man isn't meant to splice.

- A problem tenant.

- Calm down.

- We won't renew your lease.

- Where are they?

Don't patronize me! I saw them.

- But where?

- In my laboratory, the Splice of Life.

Stupid name. But it wasn't my idea.

Bunny rabbit.

"Fourscore and seven years ago..."

Nudie, nudie, nudie!

Mom, I wanna see the Gremlins!

Sir, I can't believe this.

This is worse than the first one.

We just show these movies,

we don't make them.

But...

I quit. Call the union,

the National Guard.

Those things took over the projector.

All they wanna see

is Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Enough!

I'll take care of this.

Mr. Hulk, we have Gremlins

in the projection booth.

- Could you help us?

- Gremlins? In this theater? Now?

Okay, guys, listen up.

People paid money to see this movie.

When they go out,

they want cold sodas, popcorn...

...and no monsters

in the projection booth.

Do I have to come up there?

Can the Gremsters stand up

to the Hulkster?

If I were you, I'd run the rest

of Gremlins 2 right now!

Sorry, folks. It won't happen again.

- I'm outside the Clamp Centre

office building...

... where something strange

is taking place inside, though...

- been a day Mr. Clamp

would like to forget.

- Talking about green creatures.

Police are not permitting

any news media inside.

Once we are allowed in...

... we'll broadcast live

from inside the building.

Live...

...from inside.

Hey, you! Come here.

No! Can you work a TV camera?

Work a camera? I am a camera!

Oh, good! Come with me.

No, this way. This way.

I know, you think I'm insane.

No, if you were, we couldn't sue you.

- Oh, my God.

- You see?

This is a complete failure...

...of management.

- They're eating the genetic stuff.

- Years of research, patents!

Are there any bright lights here?

They've broken them all. But I do

have some small assault weapons.

What a hunk!

- Don't be afraid of your feelings!

- Help!

It's a hobby I knew

would come in handy.

I got ordnance here that can

drop a charging puma at 50 feet.

Oh, why can't you commit?

That's what these things need,

a taste of...

Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!

To survive a war,

you gotta become war.

Let us in there.

We'll take responsibility.

Most people are out anyway.

- What's in there? I've been to Beirut.

- I bet they miss you there.

The important thing is

to keep this out of the media.

They get you to say something...

...then they twist and embellish it,

and before you know it...

- live, exclusively

over the Clamp News Channel...

... from the lobby,

where this invasion...

... by strange creatures,

perhaps from another galaxy...

... or from a dimensional warp...

... has run riot through this building,

sending people...

Dracula?

- These horrible little green

monsters in that building there!

You can't do that...

- Wait! Wait! Wait! Hold it! No water.

- What?

That's not a fire in there.

They're gremlins.

You get them wet, they'll multiply.

I can deal with them.

Sure, pal. Why don't you calm down?

Just take it easy.

Don't talk to me like I'm crazy.

I'm not crazy!

I was never crazy. I'm fine.

Let me in there!

Bill, any progress?

Just tell me there's progress.

Things are really bad out there.

Bad?! Only one of my channels

is still on the air.

There are human beings

in the building.

Do you know what kind of lawsuits

we're looking at?

Yes, I know, but...

All of our operators are busy.

Your call will be handled

in the order received.

- What is that?

- One of those things.

- They come in electric too?

- They do now.

He's in the phone system on hold.

I thought this would never run.

Maybe it will, now.

Because of the end of civilization,

CCN now leaves the air.

We hope you have enjoyed

our programming.

But more importantly,

we hope you have enjoyed life.

- It's beautiful, isn't it?

- Yes, sir. It's very uplifting.

Is there any way to turn the clocks

ahead in the building three hours?

There's nothing we can't do. Why?

Sunlight kills them.

If we can fool them into thinking

the sun has gone down...

...they may go to the lobby.

Right! The front doors are the only

way out of the building.

- The sun sets at 7:32.

- Then we should move at 4:20.

I like that!

We have information they don't have.

That's how you take somebody out.

Wait a minute.

Won't they see the sun's still out?

- You'll have to take care of that.

- Me?

- Set it up from the outside.

- Good!

I finally get to use my secret exit.

- You know, sir?

- Yes?

If you pull this off,

you could save the city.

Save the city? "Developer Saves City."

I like that!

Is anyone still employed

in this charming facility?

I need light in my office. Now!

At Clamp Enterprises we want you

to achieve all you can.

Turn on the lights in my office.

You want me to work in the dark?

This is new.

Hey, that's Clamp! Let's go!

- Has the building been evacuated?

- Is it on fire?

That's a false alarm.

We've just got some problems.

You got a guy in there

in a Dracula suit.

Are you trying to panic the city?

- So they are real?

- I didn't say that.

- What are you saying?

- What I always say.

Murray?

Gizmo?

As you probably know...

As you probably know,

an entire race of strange beings...

... has invaded the building.

And in an even more bizarre twist,

one of the creatures...

"Creatures." Is that accurate?

- That one of these creatures

is able to talk...

...and he's going to talk

with us right now.

The main question people have is:

Creature, what is it that you want?

Fred, what we want...

...is what you and your viewers have:

Civilization.

Yes, but what sort of civilization

are you speaking of?

The niceties. The fine points.

Diplomacy, compassion, standards,

manners, tradition.

That's what we reach toward.

We may stumble on the way,

but civilization, yes.

The Geneva Convention, Susan Sontag.

Everything you've worked hard

to accomplish, we aspire to.

We wanna be civilized.

Take a look at this fellow here.

Now, was that civilized? Clearly not.

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