Groundhog Day Page #14

MRS. LANCASTER

(WORRIED)

How long will you be staying with

us, Mr. Connors?

PHIL:

Indefinitely. I've already been

here for 211 days.

MRS. LANCASTER

(humoring him)

Really? That's quite a long

time, isn't it. I hope you're

finding things to do in our

little town.

PHIL:

(CASUALLY)

Yes, well, I'm getting a little

tired of casual sex so today I

thought I'd rob a bank and buy

myself a really expensive car.

-57-

Phil kisses her on the lips and walks off.

CUT TO:

EXT. PENN BANK AND TRUST - DAY

Two harmless-looking old GUARDS are calmly loading bags of cash

into an armored car parked in front of a local bank. Suddenly

Phil appears, wielding a shotgun, wearing a Batman style cape,

his face completely hidden by a ski mask.

PHIL:

(SHOUTS)

All right, freeze!! Drop your

guns J!

The guards stand there frozen with terror.

PHIL:

You guys ever been held up

before?

(they shake their

HEADS)

It's kind of exciting, isn't it?

FIRST GUARD:

(FRIGHTENED)

I guess so. Something to tell

the kids about.

PHIL:

Yeah. By the way, I'm Phil.

He raises the mask and shows his face.

FIRST GUARD:

Herman.

S E C O N D GUARD

Felix.

PHIL:

(shaking their hands)

Herman and Felix. Okay. Take it

easy, boys. And thanks.

The frightened guards watch as Phil makes off with two large

satchels of cash.

CUT TO:

INT. USED CAR DEALERSHIP - DAY

Phil pats the hood of a used BMW 850 sports car as a SALESMAN

stands by beaming. Phil is wearing a full Steelers football

uniform complete with shoulder pads.

-58-

SALESMAN:

A real beauty, huh. We picked it

u p at a--

PHIL:

I'll take it. How much?

SALESMAN:

Well, the sticker says $62,999

bu t if you want--

PHIL:

I'll tell you what. I'll give

you $70,000 if you just knock off

the car salesman stuff and let me

get out of here with my car.

The Salesman gawks as Phil opens his briefcase and starts

counting out stacks of bills.

CUT TO:

EXT. PUNXSUTAWNEY - DAY

From a high angle, we see the BMW tearing around the streets of

the town as if running a Grand Prix road race.

CUT TO:

EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY

The BMW comes screeching to a stop right in front of the movie

theater and the door opens.

A pair of really elaborate cowboy boots complete with silver

spurs hits the pavement first; then we PAN UP to see Phil

emerge from the car wearing a really gaudy; full cowboy outfit

with real six-guns on his hips. A very trashy-looking girl,

LARAINE, gets out on the passenger side, dressed like a French

maid.

LARAINE:

(very self-conscious)

I thought we were going to a

costume party.

PHIL:

Yeah, we are, we are. But first

I have this movie theater fantasy

I want to talk to you about.

He escorts her into the theater.

CUT TO:

-59-

INT. TATTOO PARLOR - ANOTHER DAY

Phil is lying on the table, getting elaborately tattooed.

Rita walks by, looks in the window and is shocked to see Phil

there.

Phil waves at her and points to the colorful new heart pierced

by a bloody dagger being tattooed on his arm.

CUT TO:

INT. BIKER BAR - NIGHT

We pan down the line of ROUGH TRADE PATRONS to. Phil, dressed

all in black leathers, both arms heavily tattooed, looking like

Sid Viscious on crack. He takes off his hat to reveal red,

white and blue hair shaved almost down to his skull. A slut

named ANGIE and another overweight, not very pretty MADONNA

WANNA-BE, both in too-tight jeans and bullet bras are coming on

to him, practically licking his ears. Angie pops a couple of

mystery pills into his mouth. Phil washes them down with a

shot and a beer.

I:

CUT TO:

INT. PHIL'S ROOM - NIGHT

It looks like ;outtakes from Fellini's "Satyricon." Heavy metal

is blaring from the radio, as several unsavory looking men and

women are partying down, a few already passed out, sleeping off

whatever hit them. Someone is knocking loudly on the door,

shouting complaints about the music. A beer bottle smashes

against the door.

Phil is sitting up on the bed with Angie. He has his arm

around her shoulder and a fifth of Wild Turkey in his hand.

PHIL:

(more to himself than

to Angie)

Yeah, but eventually you' d just

get tired of screwing around and

then you'd want a real

relationship, wouldn't you?

ANGIE:

I don't know.

A big German Shepherd tries to jump up on the bed with them.

PHIL:

Get down, Brunoi

(CONTINUING)

Someone decent, someone who you

respected, who respects you.

-60-

ANGIE:

I guess so.

The dog jumps up again.

PHIL:

Down , Bruno !

(still musing)

It's tough to find a relationship

like that, especially if your

time is kind of limited. But you

still have to try, don't you?

(the dog again)

Bruno! I told you! Off the bed!

Phil looks over at Angle who's passed out with her mouth open

PHIL:

There ' s got to be more to it than

this.

CUT TO :

EXT. A SIDE STREET - THE NEXT MORNING

Rita is in the news van reviewing the tape of Phil's report

Phil hovers at the open side door.

RITA:

You look good. I mean, it came

o ut all right. How'd you know

where to put the camera?

PHIL:

Psychic. So did you have a nice

evening?

RITA:

(GUARDED)

I just had a sandwich, watched

some TV and went to bed.

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