Group Sex
I love women.
But, like a lot.
So much, I actually get kinda emotional
when I talk about this. I'm Sorry.
I think it's because I have so much
respect for women.
I mean if women are reigning the world,
how much better off would we be?
I'm kinda like the biggest feminist there is..
anyway when I'm holding a woman and
I got one hand behind the back of her neck..
and I'm just tweaking that G-spot ..
and I'm playing like a Stradivarius
and I watch her writhe in ectasy
I mean that's like a religious experience
and I'm not gonna lie to ya.
I don't think ...
Picasso or Da Vinci has done anything more
inspired than I do when I'm with a woman.
In my own small way, I've made a contribution ...
I've made the world.. just..
a little bit better.
I guess ...
I exist ...
to please women.
That's it.
Thank you, Rachel.
That was impressive.
Very.
It almost sound like you believe what you're saying.
Almost, ja.
Okay. You know what,
I'm about to feel insulted here..
Not only I believe what I'm saying..
but what you just heard, that's my credo.
Pleasing woman, is your credo?
It is. It's my credo! Tell 'em , Andy.
Yes, yes, that is.. that is..
is his credo.
He's told me many times,
that it's his credo.
What is your credo, Andy?
Uhh, ya know, I don't know if I can really sum up ...
in a couple of sentences. It's quite complex.
Give it a shot, buddy. Okay?
Okay. I umm.. Well, I umm...
I believe in err.. I believe in justice..
and uh.. I think that everyone has the right to aa..
- To assemble.
- We have to go to the bathroom ...
And make a little.. pee-pee.
Eva.
Okay. Don't be long~ We'll miss you~
What the f*** are you talking about?
- What the f*** am I? What the f*** are you talking about?
- Me?
I don't remember what that was.
I stopped listening. I zoned out.
I'm looking at you. You're saying words that dont make sense..
Andy, do me a favor. Just pay attention, okay?
We're this close to "P*ssy Town".
This close. We're sitting at the gas station
right outside the "P*ssy Town"..
with an orange crush and a slim jim and
we're gonna cruise on in to "P*ssy Town".
Please stop saying "P*ssy Town".
Listen, I am rusty. Alright.
I don't know what you expect. I am rusty.
But they are stewardess.
From Lufthansa!
GROUP SEX:
No, goddammit. I mean what the fu-
I mean look ...
God! Look at you!
Look at you.
You are sexy and you're gorgeus and you're...
Guys, I'm insane that I'm not into this right now. You know?
I mean..
- What are we doing here?
- We're enjoying it, Andy.
We're having fun.
No! It's not fun for me. No, it's not!
You know, it's not fun for me unless.. unless..
I feel something. And I don't.
I don't feel anything.
You know, I don't care about you, at all.
Urgh, I'm sorry.
Fine.
Just.. eat me out?
Morning sunshine!
If these are'nt the fluffiest, the most delicious
pancakes on the planet.
I had to batter the eggs and the milk. And I thought
You know what, how do I wake these up?
Baking powder. A'ight.
But I want that butter milk flavor. The butter's the key.
Ya. Please, please. Tell me it's not you.
Oh, I got this maple syrup from this guy in Vermont, off eBay.
The farmer only makes
it's like a freaking Lorenzo's oil.
Is that Inge from last night?
Oh yea yea yea,
I recorded em on my site. Stored 'em on my 80 gig.
Mine did'nt work out. I sent her home.
Yea you did. Home to papa.
You don't mention that?
You give me robots tossing giant
doughnuts on a skyscraper..
doughnuts spaceships.. shooting..
lasers at robots.
- Doughnuts and robots.
- Robots and Donuts.
- Robots and Donuts.
- Doughnuts and robots.
Oh, it's a.. it's Andy. He's got an eye.
That's it?
I keep hearing what an amazing,
creative team you are..
- I dont see it.
- Oh, Come on now Alan ...
these are my.. these are my "A-Team".
You said you wanted a fresh.. these guys are more
plugged into the culture more than anybody I've got.
Oh maybe I should plug my business into another agency..
because they guys clearly miscalculated.
Looks like you guys miscalculated. That happens.
You know we did. We tried the
robots and doughnuts idea..
We thought it would be hot.. sticky..
They went for sticky and hot.
We thought it would have 'Pop".
It should have "Pop", didn't "Pop". I've never
seen anything like it. It happens.
What.. What is funny, is that this is our plan B.
We have a plan A, along the lines of what
you've been talking about.
You know.. tradition and quality.
Give us a couple of days.
A couple of days. A few days. Err, two days.
- Two days is good.
- Two days ...
That's all they need. Two days. You can do that. Ya?
No.
- Excuse me?
- I mean yeah, we can come up with something else. No problem.
But it's not gonna be as good as this.
Oh, wait a minute..
No! This is really good ...
really creative, out-of-the-box stuff here..
and if you can't see that, I dont think it's our problem..
I think that's your problem.
And maybe this isn't the right agency for you.
Cause I tell you something..
It's not about wether or not your doughtnot is delicious..
It's about you bringing your brand into the 21st century.
This is bullshit, Jerry.
What the f***! Was that?
Guys.. Guys..
Fine, you got me.
We'll do it your way.
Personally I don't get it, but uh.. we'll pitch my dad.
God, you guys got balls.
Oh yea, they got two.. four big ball.
big..
Incredible.
That was.. amazing.
I don't want to say it but
I'm proud of you man.
I don't know which way it's gonna go..
you played that guy perfectly.
Perfectly, man!
I was'nt playing him. Jerry.
I'm just sick with the bullshit in my life
- Good for you.
- Yeah, I'm tired of it.
I'm tired of the
one-night stand..
I'm tired of.. of crashing at your place for the past six months..
and I'm tired of feeling
sorry for myself ...
because my fiance
slept with some dick from the gym
and then dump me after 5 fantastic years together.
Good, vent!
- I just.. I'm taking a stand against bullshit.
- Get it out.
- You want to know what my credo is, Jerry?
- What's that?
No more bullshit.
I love that credo. Great, let's celebrate that credo tonight.
I've got an amazing situation lined up for us tonight.
- Jerry.
- Yeah?
Why shouldn't you just, get the slightest
bit sick of me? Little bit?
Sick of you? No.
We work together, we live together ...
we hang out together every night ...
it.. that's not healthy.
- What's not healthy?
- Us!
- What're you saying? What, you got plans tonight?
- Yes
Okay. Good. What are we doing?
Thank you.
- F***er!
- Sorry, sorry.
Hey, hey wait!
What, Jerry?
Yea listen up, Phoebe, Giselle and the girls ...
want to talk about airbrushing and retouching
and I told my art director was on his way
Uh-huh.
Listen, get your ass back to "P*ssy Town" man,
we're about to play "Spin the models".
Alright. Sounds good, man. Have a good time!
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"Group Sex" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 21 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/group_sex_9365>.
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