Guinevere Page #5

- I don't have anything

against women my own age.

- Sure you do.

I tell you what --

I'll tell you my theory,

and you just

jump in any time.

All right?

Oh, you can sit.

For starters,

I don't really think...

that your young girl predilection

has much to do...

with their firm,

young flesh.

I mean, when someone like you

is out with someone like Harper,

you must invite all kinds

of comparison and ridicule,

which can't be much fun...

for either of you.

Right, honey?

So then, what is...

a man of, uh, your age...

doing with

my 21-year-old daughter?

It'd be easy enough to say you're afraid

of mature women, but that's so glib.

Afraid of what,

exactly?

So I kept thinking.

And then it hit me.

I know exactly what she has

that I haven't got.

Awe.

That's it, isn't it?

I mean, no real woman --

no woman of experience

would ever stand in front of you...

with awe in her eyes...

and say,

"Wow, look at that man.

Look at that bohemian

wedding photographer...

with holes in his jeans.

Gosh, isn't he something?"

No.

I mean, it takes

a naive girl for that.

It takes Harper for that.

So what do you think?

Am I right?

You're some woman,

Deborah.

Mrs. Sloane.

I'm Mrs. Sloane.

I know what

you're doing,

and it makes me sick.

Well...

that was fun.

Actually, I really didn't

enjoy myself all that much.

- But I think you did, didn't you?

- What?

The shocked way you acted

about your mom being here.

It was very convincing.

You really had me

going there.

It took me a few minutes before

I realized that you'd put your

mother up to the whole thing.

You know, it's amazing,

but...

when you're in love,

even someone like me...

can forget

the most basic truths.

Everybody's just a product

of their environment.

How could you be

any different...

from the ruling class

you come from?

Of course,

you're a disingenuous, deceitful,

untrustworthy, two-faced

piece of bourgeois trash.

It's not your fault.

I don't blame you.

But I never want

to see you again, okay?

When I get back,

I don't want you here.

Connie.

Couldn't you find

your suitcase?

I didn't look

very hard.

I'm so happy to see that

four years of reading Chaucer...

has prepared you for this

glorious career in food service.

Do not be a snob. There's nothing

wrong with honest work, Patty.

You hate it.

We've got back rent

to pay, all right?

- So?

- So I'm doing this.

- While he's doing what?

- Please don't join the ranks

of the disapproving.

Well, I'm sorry.

I think it's weird.

A 21-year-old woman

supporting a 90-year-old man.

Okay, "A," he's not 90, and "B,"

look, I'm not supporting him.

I'm temporarily carrying the burden.

You know what?

It's sexist of you, and ageist, to

expect he should be doing everything...

just because he's a man

and old.

Why doesn't he photograph

weddings anymore?

There's nothing wrong with

honest work, blah, blah, blah.

I just want you

to be happy, Harper.

I am happy, Patty.

- He's really helping me.

- If you say so.

Just stay open to it

if some cute guy shows up...

- who wants to lick you all over.-

- There you go. Enjoy.

- Thanks.

Yeah,

I noticed them too.

They haven't stopped watching us

since we sat down.

- Sweet suffering Jesus.

- Okay, that's horrifying.

- Nice you can laugh about it.

- Why?

'Cause it bothers you.

I know it does.

I know it's not easy

being with me.

People are thinking whatever they think

about us. They don't understand.

What's not

to understand?

You're rich and powerful, and if I suck

your dick, you'll put me in your movie.

Harper,

I know what I am.

I know I'm not the youngest man

in the world or the wealthiest.

I know I'm not

the most rational man.

And believe it or not,

I know I'm not particularly gorgeous.

But I have to believe I'm giving you

something, this is good for you.

'Cause if it wasn't,

I couldn't stand it.

You're the first person who's ever

believed in me even a little bit.

Look at everything

I'm learning.

- You're doing what you wanna do.

- Of course.

You're here

of your own free will.

You could leave

any time you wanted.

Jesus.

What's gotten into you?

Just put me in your movie and shut up.

- Thanks.

- And you are particularly gorgeous.

Thank you.

And -- And I know

I can leave any time.

Right.

Like I was thinking...

that maybe it would be good

if I started looking...

for a place of my own

in a few months.

Uh-huh.

I mean,just something small,

close to your place.

No big deal.

- Are you upset?

- No.

Just the first I've heard

of it, that's all.

I mean, it's not like

we're breaking up or anything, right?

- It's just a place

I can put all my stuff.

- You haven't got any stuff.

I have stuff.

Yeah.

Of course.

Wh-Whatever you say.

I just --

I thought maybe we could look together.

We can find someplace we both like.

Sure, sure.

Look, I have some things to do.

I'll see you back at home.

I thought we were going to Zack's place,

to the book party thing.

- We're not going?

- You go.

Connie, when I said a few months,

I didn't necessarily mean that.

- It might be a year, or I don't know.

- Fine.

Uh, what you say is fine.

There's a review in here

of theJackson Pollack at the Whitney.

I'll see you at home

later on.

Hey, f*** you,

motherf***er.

Connie?

This is why you should

stop drinking, pal.

Yeah.

- I'll check on him again later.

- Okay.

Thanks, Zack.

Bye.

You know,

I've been thinkin',

Harper.

You've been unconscious.

Yeah, I know, but...

I was thinkin',

what we really need...

is to have some fun.

You know,

like a lot of fun.

This is fun.

I have this collector

in Los Angeles...

who wants to buy

some photographs.

Let's get out of here.

Let's pack up

and head off to L.A...

for a few days.

Okay?

## Ay, ay, ay, ay ##

## Como me gusta ##

## Mira, mi amor ##

##

Yeah, I made a lot

of money in L.A. over the years.

In the early '70s, this gallery

on La Cienega that repped me,

they couldn't keep my stuff

on the walls.

- L.A. was good to me.

I'm glad we're going there.

- Me too.

Walter, he's been trying

to get me back down there for years.

He'll probably ask us

to stay with him.

- Do you think he's going

to buy a lot of pictures?

- Oh, sure.

- He's a big collector, Walter.

- Well, that's great.

So, you know,

we're going to be rich.

Champagne and caviar

for everyone!

That's so like you,

Queen Guinevere,

sharing the wealth.

Well, I have

a royal proclamation.

Proceed, Your Royal Highness.

Your loyal subject is all ears.

Good, because

when we get to L.A.,

- Uh-huh.

- I, Queen Guinevere,

- Mm-hmm.

- am going to stun the world...

Mm-hmm.

- and take a photograph.

- Jesus Christ.

Bravo.

Congratulations.

I thank you.

And, uh, what are you going to take

a photograph of, Your Highness?

You...

in a bathing suit, with a surfboard

going, "Surf s up, dude."

You'll do that for me,

right?

What, you don't approve

of my subject matter?

- What is it?

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