Hairspray Page #4

I don't know what happened, Mr. Spritzer.

Corny had some sort

of aneurysm or something...

and... picked her.

...by our brand-new Council Member,

Miss Tracy Turnblad.

So, Trace, come on, cozy up to old Corny

and tell us about yourself.

Well, I watch The Corny Collins Show...

and I do absolutely nothing else!

Ooh! I sure like the way you talk.

Oh, Wilbur, to think that

I almost stopped her...

from reaching for the stars.

And now here she

is on local daytime TV.

She's gonna be a regular.

Imagine, my little girl, regular at last.

I also hope to be the first woman president

or a Rockette.

And if you were president, Tracy...

what would your first official act be?

Hmm.

I'd make every day Negro Day.

I read you like tomorrow's

headlines, Tracy.

What do you think, kids?

You think we might

have a hot new candidate...

for Miss Teenage Hairspray?

That's only the dream of my life.

But Miss Hairspray is mine.

Uh, we're on the air.

And your dream will be

comin' to you, sweetheart...

Saturday, June 2nd,

right here on WYZT.

You have to vote for a person, Corny,

not one of the Himalayas.

Hi, Penny.

Always the charmer, Amber.

I want that chubby communist

girl off the show.

Well, let me be the first

to toss the harpoon.

She's a corrupting influence!

I agree. We don't want our dancers

thrusting like savages!

Hey, speak for yourself.

Don't get flip with me.

I'm not.

Look, now I got some

new ideas for the show.

First, we get rid-a Negro Day.

Finally, some sense outta you.

And we mix those kids in

with the rest-a the Council.

Mix those kids?

That's right, I said it.

This is not a black-and-tan cocktail!

Well, why couldn't it be?

velma, isn't this where

it's all headin' anyway?

Now, you can fight it

or you can rock out to it.

Maybe it is time for some fresh ideas...

like-like a nice, fresh new host!

Heh.

Gee, velma,

how do you fire Corny Collins...

from The Corny Collins Show?

They do it all the time on Lassie!

velma, you've let this go too far!

Me?

- Fix it!

- What?

Fix it!

Ohh!

# Hey, look out for that movin' van #

# Drivin' down our streets #

# You better lock up your man #

# Before he meets the new girl in town #

# Who just came on the scene... #

Tracyface whoopee cushion.

Good choice.

We got your Tracy souvenirs for days.

Here, your signed photos.

Tracy wigs.

# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #

# We don't know what to do

'bout the new girl in town #

# The new girl in town #

# Seems to dance on air #

# The new girl in town #

# She's got the coolest hair #

# You better tell the homecoming queen

to hold onto her crown #

# Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa #

# Or she's gonna lose it to #

# The new girl in town #

That big little girl is sending

my sales through the roof.

More people are breathing

aerosol than oxygen!

Do you think you could show us

some of those new dance moves?

Yeah, sure.

Ooh, pretty flowers.

Tracy, wait up!

# She's hip #

# So cool #

# I'm gonna get her after school #

# And yet we'd like to be like her #

# 'Cause she's the kitten

that the cats prefer #

# The new girl in town #

# Has my guy on a string #

# The new girl in town #

# Hey, look, she's wearin' his ring #

# I can't stop cryin' and

so in my own tears #

# I'm gonna drown #

# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #

# 'Cause he wants to rendezvous #

# With the new girl #

# We're kinda sad and blue #

# Yes, it's true, girl #

# We'd like to say #

# To the new girl in town #

# The new girl in town #

Hi, I'm here to see Tracy Turnblad.

Where's her write-up?

She doesn't need a detention slip,

she's with me.

Penny, this is Seaweed.

Seaweed, this is Penny.

# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #

Huh.

# To the new girl in town #

# The new girl in town #

# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #

# From out of the blue, girl #

# Hey, this town's in a stew, girl #

# Ohh, what a hullabaloo, girl #

# She ain't just passing through, girl #

# Ohh, she's sticking like glue, girl #

# Woo, to the man

I thought I knew, girl #

# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #

# Hey, look out for that movin' van #

# Look out, look out,

look out, look out #

# She was the new girl in #

# Town #

That's the way you do it.

And I'm your fabled

Miss Motormouth Maybelle...

your DJ du jour,

pitchin' rhythm your way.

So, hey, better stay

and shimmy and sway.

We'll be right back with more Negro Day.

Brought to you by...

Nap-a-Way, for stubborn hair.

Every kink will be gone in a blink.

We're off.

Girls, that was great.

How dare you pick the same song?

They wrote it.

You watch yourself.

You are one inch from being canceled.

You know what your demographic is?

Cleaning ladies and lawn jockeys.

A foot in the door, that's all it is.

One toe at a time.

Eh.

Hello?

Is this the Turnblad residence?

Yes.

Mr. Pinky speakin'.

Mr. Pinky from-from the dress shop?

Uh-huh.

I'd like Tracy

for our spokesgirl.

You want Tracy to do what?

Be our spokesgirl.

Be a spokesgirl?

I think she'd be perfect.

I'd like to meet her...

and discuss the details.

As soon as possible.

OK, um, well, we'll have send

someone down to meet you.

Tonight, if you can.

So, um, oh, OK.

Bye-bye, Mr. Pinky.

Bye-bye.

The Mr. Pinky?

From Mr. Pinky's hefty hideaway!

A spokesgirl?!

- Mm-hmm.

- Oh, tell me I get a free caftan, tell me!

Oh, Tracy, I think perks like

caftans have to be negotiated.

Maybe we should get you an agent.

OK. You be my agent.

What? Tracy Turnblad...

has fame gone to your head

and made you wacky?

Well, why not?

Who's goin' to look out for me...

better than my mom?

Me, an agent?

You see me hobnobbin'

and drinkin' rum and cokes...

with all those hoi pollois?

And out-negotiating them.

Oh, you're crazy.

Oh, Tracy, I haven't left

this house in-in years.

Then isn't it time you did?

Oh, no, Tracy.

We'll have your father meet with him.

L- I don't wanna be seen like this.

Why not?

I'll do it after my next diet.

That's when I'll do it.

Ya see, the neighbors haven't

seen me since I was a size 10.

Don't make me do it, Tracy.

Ma, it's changing out there.

You'll like it.

People who are different.

Their time is coming.

# Hey, Mama, hey, Mama, look around #

# Everybody's groovin'

to a brand-new sound #

# Hey, Mama, hey, Mama follow me #

# I know somethin's in ya

that you wanna set free #

# So let go, go, go of the past now #

# Say hello to the love in your heart #

# Yes, I know that

the world's spinning fast now #

# You gotta get yourself

a brand-new start #

# Hey, Mama, welcome to the sixties #

# Oh-o-o-o-o #

# Oh, Mama, welcome to the sixties #

# Oh-o-o-o-o #

# Go, Mama, go, go, go #

# Welcome to the sixties #

# Oh-o-o-o-o oh #

# Hey, Mama, yeah, yeah, yeah #

# Yeah, yeah, yeah #

# Hey, Mama, hey, Mama, have some fun #

# I haven't left this house since 1951 #

# Hey, Mama, hey, Mama, take a chance #

# Oh, Tracy, it's been years

since someone asked me to dance #

# So let go, go, go of the past now #

# Say hello to the light in your eyes #

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