Hannah Montana: One in a Million

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Y'all come back now, you hear?

Thank you all for coming.

Great PTA meeting.

That vegetarian lasagna was delicious.

Ooh, and those pork-free pork chops,

that's some good eating. (laughs)

(both) Yeah.

Dang it, honey, don't anybody

in California eat meat anymore?

That's a large pepperoni, sausage pizza

and a big old bucket

of bacon on the side.

Oh, l'm sorry,

did you guys want something?

Now, Lilly,

that's what l love about your mom.

Looks like an angel,

but eats like a truck driver.

Was that supposed to be a compliment?

From him? Oh, yeah.

Finally, they're gone! Dad,

the next time you host a PTA meeting,

at least do it out in the hot tub

so l can see Lilly's mom in...

...the kitchen! (chuckl)

Hey, Ms. T! Warn a guy!

And he don't have a girlfriend.

Go figure!

l appreciate you and Lilly staying,

but you don't have to

stick around to help clean.

Ah, you just want

that pizza all to yourself.

That is not true. But l will wrtle you

for that bucket of bacon.

(laughs) Why isn't he laughing?

The man don't joke about his bacon.

Jackson, you could help

clean up too, if you like.

l am helping. Man,

this chocolate pudding tast awful.

That's because it's Mrs. Devahl's

fast-acting prune butter.

Why do they call it...?

Excuse me.

ls it just me, or are they

actually starting to like each other?

You mean like or... ''like'' like?

l'll tell you the bt steakhouse in LA,

Jimmy's down on Third.

Oh, one time l heard a cow say,

''When l go,

just serve me up at Jimmy's.''

- (laughing)

- (both) ''Like'' like!

Man, l haven't seen my mom even

look at a guy since the divorce.

lt'd be so cool if they started dating.

Cooler if they got married.

- (gasps)

- So how about Saturday?

lt's a date.

(both) We're gonna be sisters!

What are we eating?

- Oh, boy.

- Oh, boy! Oh!

# Come on

# You get the limo out front

# Hot styl, every shoe, every color

# Yeah, when you're famous

it can be kind of fun

# lt's really you

but no one ever discovers

# Who would have thought

that a girl like me

# Would double as a superstar

# You get the bt of both worlds

# Chill it out, take it slow

Then you rock out the show

# You get the bt of both worlds

# Mix it all together and you know

that it's the bt of both worlds #

(laughs)

Ooh, make sure your dad

wears his earring.

My mom says it mak him look

like a pirate and she lov her pirat.

Perfect! He's always looking

for an excuse to wear his puffy shirt.

(laughing)

Tell your mom to wear that drs that

she wore at my folks' Christmas party

She looked so ho...

- ...lidayish.

- (school bell rings)

Very ftive. (chuckl) l got to go.

OK, that was gross,

but he's not wrong about the drs.

- True. After you, sis.

- No, after you, sis.

Oh, tell her not too much perfume.

She's gonna have

to keep laughing at jok,

even when they stop being funny.

And trust me, that day will come.

OK, perfume, jok,

Oliver's ''ho... liday'' drs.

Write a list

and l'll write one for you.

- Cool.

- (laughing)

,Buenos dias!

Guten Tag!

Bonjour!

(French accent) Welcome to the wonderful

world of international relations.

- Ooh! Ooh, good one!

- Well, thank you, Miss Truscott.

lt's always nice to be appreciated.

(chuckl)

Now, next week, all of you will be

ambassadors of an imaginary country

as we try to rolve

problems peacefully.

- Oh, this is gonna work great!

- (Scottish accent) Aye.

And it certainly will if everyone

shows that kind of enthusiasm.

Stewart, Truscott, the two of you

are a great joy to have in class.

Right back at ya! (laughs)

Why are we

a (Scottish accent) great joy?

(Scottish accent)

l don't know. Keep writing!

Something don't look right, but what?

- What could it be?

- Hmm.

Maybe it's the annoying

little twerp staring back at you.

(fak laugh) No.

lt's the sand around the shack.

lt all just, l don't know, blends in.

That's because we're,

l don't know, on a beach.

Watch and learn, Jackson.

(laughs) Or in your case, just watch.

Bring it in, Charlie!

(beeping)

Sand. You actually bought sand.

This isn't just sand.

lt's... Costa (rolls ''r'') Rican sand.

Fint in the world.

Feel it, (sniffs) smell it, unload it.

- Excuse me?

- Remember to lift with your kne.

(cackl)

Oh, l'll lift with my kne all right.

Now this l'll be happy to unload.

Let me go! Jackson! Put me down!

Oh, l'll put you down.

(exhal) There.

Have fun hanging out.

Jackson, get back here!

You're the worst employee in the world!

You're the worst boss in the world.

You wouldn't last a week

working for a jerk like you.

And you wouldn't last a week

managing a bonehead like you.

l bet you 50 bucks

you couldn't even last the weekend.

Wait, you're willing to pay me 50

bucks to switch plac? You are so on.

Fine. For the rt of the weekend,

l'm Jackson, you're Rico.

Now, get me down from here.

Sorry, Jackson.

Rico don't take orders from you.

Get yourself down. (cackl)

Jackson!

# Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah #

Whee, doggi,

it sure feels good to be puffy again!

Yeah, yeah, you're a regular puff daddy.

OK, let's review, shall we?

So she lov the Boston Red Sox,

hat when people drs their dogs

- and her favorite ice cream is...

- Chocolate crunchy.

Not chocolate crunchy,

it's fudgey munchy!

Sweet niblets,

how'd you get out of high school?

By doing my homework, which

is exactly what you should be doing.

OK. l'm sorry, Pops,

but l mean, it's you and Lilly's mom.

lt would be so cool...

Mile, l appreciate the coaching.

l know what you're trying to do,

but face it.

l've already got the duds and the 'do,

anything else would be just unfair.

OK, remember, he lov...

Car racing, Lynyrd Skynyrd, and, um,

those Japane game shows

where people fall off logs.

l've never been so proud of you.

- (doorbell rings)

- Ooh, lipstick check.

How ya doing?

- We're very close.

- Move your finger, honey.

OK.

- That is one beautiful drs.

- That is one puffy shirt.

- Drive safe!

- Next stop, sister town.

(both) Bye!

# Ooh, yeah #

Man, Lilly,

this is harder than l thought.

lf we just concentrate,

we'll figure it out.

l've gone over the numbers ten tim.

Once you move in, there is no way

all of our sho are gonna fit.

Well, what are we gonna do?

l gus l could give some away.

You would give away sho for me?

- You're the bt sister ever!

- l know!

(computer beeps)

Oh, hold on,

l'm getting a video msage.

People of Earth,

people of Earth, people of Earth!

Don't be alarmed, it's Mr. Corelli!

Just a gentle little reminder

to all of you

that lnternational Relations Week

starts on Monday, so be prepared.

(woman) Francis,

do you want one fish stick or two?

Not now, Ma! l'm on the computer!

Mr. Corelli, over and out.

Four! And don't hog the tartar sauce!

This explains so much.

Once we get our parents together,

we have got to get that man a date.

- (car door closing)

- (gasps)

(both) They're back!

l can't wait to hear how the date went!

Me neither.

Slow down, slow down, slow down.

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