Happy Bhag Jayegi Page #3

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...I'll have Mr. Junior strip you of your uniform...

...and blow balloons at the children's park, or my name isn't Happy.

This is my last warning to you.

Let me make one call to India...

...or else I will have you thrown out of Lahore!

You have no idea how much Mr. Junior respects me.

He practically dances to my tunes.

I'll give you one more chance to obey!

Otherwise I'll get you transferred to Kabul.

Amidst all the Talibanis!

And you...

Come.

Look, just let me... - Come on.

Make her sit in the car.

And take some more people with you, she runs away.

Leave me.

Curses

Mr. Junior.

What is this Indian bud that you're..

..trying to grow on Lahore's soil?

Afridi, she is a mistake!

And she can ruin father's reputation.

If this leaks out, then we'll be humiliated Internationally!

First you ran away from your home...

...then you ran away from my home.

Do you even think before doing anything? - No.

I want a phone.

Are you not even a little tensed that you are in Pakistan?

Pakistan should be tensed, not me!

You've a screw loose, you know that?

Anyways, you'll be sent to India right now.

Bull sh you cannot send me back.

I am sending you back.

The deportation guys will come and take you with them...

Don't even think about it.

I know...how well reputed your family is.

And how helpless it can be because of me.

I'll tell the media... that Javed Ahmed and Bilal Ahmed...

...brings girls here from India without passport or visa.

And they make them... do God knows what.

I want to send you back home respectfully...

...and you're threatening to ruin my reputation.

Yes.

I can't believe my ears.

I can't believe my eyes!

Quietly handover your phone.

Hand it over or... - Just shut up, okay.

Was that Bilal's car?

What are you doing?

Follow him.

Wagah?

I won't go to Amritsar. Stop the car.

This won't car stop now.

Stop the car. Have you lost your mind?

Do you know whose car is that? - Whose?

Zoya's. - So?

She's my fiance.

A grown man afraid of his fianc?

Stop the car and I'll talk to her.

You'll talk to her? Who are you?

Happy!

Oh...no!

Damn it!

Come out, Bilal. - Zo...

First come out.

Why did you run after seeing me?

And who is she?

She...

She is Happy. - I can see that she is.

But I am asking you her name.

Her name is Happy.

And what is Happy doing in the front seat of your car?

What is she doing...

Hey you...who are you?

What do you want?

Why are you wearing that wedding dress?

Should I have worn a night dress for my wedding?

What?

Bilal...what is she saying?

What are you saying?

Actually she is right.

Hold on...let me explain to you.

Just give me a minute, okay.

How dare you? What is this..

Get in the car, I'll explain everything.

Please.

That front seat's mine.

Get out and sit on the backseat.

Now!

You're marrying her?

Take my advice...

...and tie a big stone around your neck and jump in the river.

Everything you told me is a lie.

I don't believe this nonsense.

And Guddu!

It must be one of your nicknames.

You've known me since I was a kid...

...when did I ever have a nickname like Guddu?

She is Happy.

Guddu's Happy.

Say something... why are you quiet now? Huh?

I am stuck amongst a bunch of idiots!

I've been asking for a phone call since morning.

I would've spoken to Guddu by now.

Correct.

I am such a fool

Here...call your Guddu...

...and let her speak to him as well.

Hold on, I am going to ask his name.

Give that to me.

Brother, 'Private Number' flashing on Guddu's cellphone?

Hello. - Am I speaking with Guddu?

There's no Guddu here.

Who is that?

Don't you know English?

Me Daman Singh Bagga... Punjabi to English non-stop top speed.

Who you be? What you want?

Are you demented? You're Guddu, right?

I already told you this is Bagga speaking,

Who you be? - Angelina Jolie.

Curse you...

Hang up!

Stupid idiot!

There is no Guddu!

Who was it, brother? - Some Jolly.

Trying to flaunt her English.

Did you hear your brother's English?

There's no Guddu?

There's no bloody Guddu.

There's no bloody Guddu.

Here he is!

It's either Happy or Jolly...

Wonder who else Guddu's been going around with?

It's all because of his music.

If you could play the guitar or something... - Then what?

Should I quit politics?

And become a musician? - Hold on! Hold on!

Who was on the phone? - Some Bagga.

Bagga's the guy my father wanted me to marry.

Now there's a Bagga in the story too.

No-no-no-no...there's a Bagga.

There's a Bagga since morning.

Good afternoon.

Hello, dad. - Hello, dear.

Who is this?

She's Happy. - Happy? Who?

Bilal...tell him.

Uncle she's...my Happy cousin...

I mean my cousin Happy.

Javed never mentioned anything about her.

Happy dear...where do you live? - K-K-Karachi.

She is from Karachi.

To attend a wedding. - Very nice, Karachi.

So dear what's happening in Karachi these days?

She's a very homely kid, uncle...

...she wouldn't know what's happening in...Karachi.

Bilal...you're answering all the questions.

Let me here this cute girl's voice as well.

She won't speak.

She-she-she won't speak.

Why?

How can she speak? - She can't speak?

I am sorry, is she...

Just a minute...excuse me.

Dear, look after Happy. Okay.

Yes. Tell me.

You've started lying so flawlessly.

Tell me honestly, what's going on between you two?

Why do you come back to that?

Where else should I go?

Come here.

Think about solving this problem. - Am I a problem?

Oh just...will you please shut up?

Just shut up alright!

My life is ruined ever since you popped out of that basket!

Zoya, even if I try to deport her... she'll blabber nonsense to the media.

So just help me.

There is only one solution.

If there's actually some Guddu.

Then call him here, get these two married...

...and deport them back together.

Superb. Great idea! - Oh Shut up!

Okay, please just shut up.

Zoya, have you gone mad?

I already told you I've nothing to do with her.

Let's assume that you don't.

But the world will believe her, not you. Right?

And let's say we forcefully deport her.

Then once she's back home...

...she can tarnish Javed uncle's reputation, and our marriage, right?

Right.

And I won't let that happen.

So? - So?

So...

How will Guddu get here?

If this nuisance can come in a basket...

...he can still catch a bus.

He even has a passport.

And where will this nuisance stay until then?

She's your mute cousin, so keep her in your house.

What?

No...never.

She will stay in aunty Rifat's quarters.

And you...

Until I don't see your Guddu with my own eyes...

...I will keep my eyes on you.

And...and on this Guddu. Get it?

okay.

Zo...

Did you see something? - You saw it too.

I've been seeing it since I was a kid.

Mom often visits during her death anniversary

Did you see her for the first time, papa?

No-no...I've seen her before.

In fact I see her every year.

Rifat. - Yes.

Listen.

Tell me something. - Yes?

Have you ever seen Shaista's spirit in this house?

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