Happy Funeral Director Page #3

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If you're going to learn,

you have to overcome fear first.

Why do you keep hiding?

There must be something to see.

It's going to shrivel,

anyway, I need to use it up!

Aren't you scared?

About what?

I keep seeing dead person's face.

I was always good

at forgetting things since I was a child.

That's why you were always the last

at school.

Did you see?

I don't have to.

Oh, why did I sleep here?

My dad said I could eat here,

but I should sleep at home.

Oh, my head.

- I'm bleeding.

- What's going on?

Some b*tch smacked my head

with a bottle in my dream.

Why is this guy sleeping here?

- He must be scared.

- Dog meat is best for fear.

Jaehyon, are you really

going to the public cemetery?

- I'm scared.

- Oh, be a man.

My problem is I don't get scared.

An undertaker has to sleep

in the cemetery for 3 nights.

Wow, she has huge tits.

It's a wonder bra.

Ms. Hwang, tell us a creepy story.

A cemetery story?

Yeah.

A public cemetery is full

of ass-poking ghosts.

A guy show up and a ghost says

"Wanna die or be poked up your ass!"

This guy hates being poked in the ass.

He said, "I'll rather die."

You know what the ghost said?

"Then I'll poke your ass until you die."

God, that's so scary.

Yes, three of them. One, two, three.

A sexy girl in a skirt and two men.

I concluded that

it was a threesome love affair.

And they committed suicide.

Or from the bubbles around their mouths,

It was a group suicide

by religious freaks.

Anyway, I took care of them

and put them in coffins.

Excuse me, you didn't die?

You can't even tell

between a dead person and a living one.

What king of undertaker are you?

You're an embarrassment to our business.

I'm sorry. We just started this business.

We were so happy to see dead bodies.

Doesn't the meal taste better

after almost dying?

Eat up.

Where did Cheol Ku go?

What did you see

when you screamed last night?

Nothing. I was just scared.

I'm so hungry.

Because you slept too much.

We ate already.

I was just sleeping.

I wasn't busy sleeping.

God, you're such a jerk.

Hey, wait up.

Not all people die in peace.

Some are bruised,

some have their eyes turned out.

Some die sitting and

some clench their teeth.

A person with sclerosis in the liver

has a swollen stomach.

It's soft when you touch it.

If you're not careful,

all kinds of stuff flow out of 9 holes.

After a few hours,

black spots appear on the skin and

the body stiffens.

Those who die from poison don't stiffen,

they're soft.

Those who hung themselves

have their tongue sticking out.

You have to massage near the mouth

for the tongue to go in.

If it still doesn't go in, then...

When the body rots, the balls rot first.

The more it was used,

the faster it rots, got it?

An undertaker doesn't only deal

with the body.

He sends the spirit to the world

of the spirits.

That's nice.

A good undertaker can even see ghosts.

He can play with ghosts

and drink with them.

You have to be able to play

with ghosts to be an undertaker.

Really? That's such a bullshit.

Be careful.

That's it for today.

What would you say

about your parents' death?

The sky has fallen apart.

I'm sorry to be alive.

What would you sat

about your child's death?

The earth has split open.

Everything is dark.

- Did you see a ghost?

- No.

When do you think

you'll be able to play with a ghost?

After a while.

What will you say when you meet them?

I will say mother-f***er.

Why are you swearing in your greeting?

Oh, this is such a bullshit.

Crazy bastards.

Grandfather, we already learned all this.

What's the use? There's no work.

No work.

You learned everthing?

You don't know anything.

The heaven gives you work.

Hey, I got an idea.

We find a cooperative company.

We can advertise.

It's hard to survive

just sitting and waiting.

You want to make money doing this work?

You don't even know that

you're supposed to learn.

You think what we do is

to take care of bodies.

That's not all, this is a cutting edge...

Wait!

A gold ring. Who's this for?

You must be really stupid.

It's for me? Really?

Daesik, you must really love me.

Screw love. How about dating?

Then, I'll call you.

Look, look at this.

Daesik gave me a gold ring.

Isn't it pretty?

- Is this that...

- What?

Ms. Hwang, do you know what this is?

It's made from the gold teeth

of a dead body. How scary.

Who cares if it's from a dead person.

Stupid. It's still a gold ring.

He's dead.

Really. Who doesn't wear shrouds?

What, you want to send him off naked?

He delivered letters all his life.

I want to send him to heaven

in his mailman uniform.

Like the king of heaven writes Letters,

that's funny.

Is it because of the cost?

There are things to follow in a funeral.

The reason for putting hemp clothes is

because the skin rots.

Just let him wear his uniform.

What?

What, funerals have etiquette and rules.

This is the etiquette and rules.

It's the dead person who is important.

Do it.

But this is our job.

We only had one funeral.

Let's sell some shrouds.

You're going to sell clothes

to a dead man? You rat...

The dead is not important,

Living people are.

You want to make money?! Get lost.

I don't have anything more to teach you.

And I don't have anything more to learn.

So if I do as you say,

you'll give me money?

You can buy land

and date pretty women, too.

On this highway alone

there are 20 accidents a month.

This all goes to the hospital.

We get policeman Kim's help

and make us an official undertaker.

Policeman Kim will be responsible

for traffic accidents.

How about letting us be members, too?

We'll deliver coffee cheap.

Good. For half price.

Did Yoni come here?

No.

Did she go to the river in this rain?

The river?

The river in this rain?

Jaehyon! Jaehyon!

Yes, grandfather.

Yoni? Did she go to her father's grave?

Hello.

An accident? Where?

Oh, it's an accident. Call 911!!

Yoni!

Yoni!

So, how many died?

I've never seen a corpse.

What happened?

What's going on?

They're all gone.

This is a strong typhoon. All this rain.

They're all going to the Hospital.

We're screwed.

You need skills to make money

with dead bodies.

Take that side road.

Look, it's Jaehyon.

Hey, stop the car.

What is it?

Daesik, get the coffin.

Don't just sit there, get up.

We have a long way to go.

I don't want to go.

I want to quit.

You fools. An undertaker shouldn't cry.

You're going to keep your job?

I want you to keep your job.

Wow, you really cleaned the store.

Want a cup of coffee?

No.

Then, how about a flower?

How about this one?

See you around!

Life's no big deal.

Once you die,

the body starts to stink in a few hours.

You've become more charming.

I think so too once in a while.

It's Daesik. What's he doing here?

Daesik? He comes every day.

Why do you come here?

Because I don't have anything else to do.

Someone died? Where?

I'll go by myself.

You want to buy flowers?

I'll do it.

Many people have died.

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