Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets Page #3

LOCATION:
King’s Cross Station – exterior - daytime

LOCATION:
Flying Car – over London - daytime

HARRY:
Ron, I should tell you, most Muggles aren’t accustomed to seeing a

flying car.

RON:
Uh, right. Okay.

LOCATION:
Flying Car – over countryside - daytime

RON:
Oh no! The Invisibility Booster must be faulty!

HARRY:
Well come on, then. Let’s go lower. We need to find the train.

RON:
Okay.

LOCATION:
Flying Car – over train tracks - daytime

HARRY:
Now all we need to do is catch up with the train.

RON:
We can’t be far behind.

HARRY:
Do you hear that?

RON:
We must be gettin’ close.

HARRY:
Hold on...

HARRY, RON:
Aaahhh! Aaahhhh! Aaahhh!

HARRY:
Wha-aahhh!

RON:
Harry! Hold on! Take my hand! Hold on!

HARRY:
I’m trying. Your hand’s all sweaty.

HARRY:
I think we found the train.

RON:
Yeah.

Scene 8:
Whomping Willow.

LOCATION:
Flying Car – over Hogwarts - night

RON:
Welcome home.

HARRY:
Up! Up!

RON:
It’s not working! Ahhhh!

HARRY:
Up! Up! Ron! Mind that tree!

RON:
Stop! Stop! Stop! Huh... Aahh!

HARRY:
Ahh!

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – grounds – in Whomping Willow - night

RON:
Ahh-ha-ha! My wand. Look at my wand.

HARRY:
Be thankful it’s not your neck.

RON:
What’s happening?

HARRY:
I don’t know.

WHOMPING WILLOW:
Argg!

HARRY, RON:
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!

RON:
Ahh! Ahhhh! Ahh!

HARRY, RON:
Aaaahhhh!

HARRY:
Come on! Go! Fast!

HARRY, RON:
Ahh!

RON:
Scabbers, you OK? The car! ...Dad’s gonna kill me.

Scene 9:
Not expelled…today.

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – staircase - night

HARRY:
See you, Hedwig. So, a house elf shows up in my bedroom, we can’t get

through the barrier to platform nine and three-quarters, we almost get killed

by a tree... clearly someone doesn’t want me here this year.

FILCH:
Well, take a good look lads. This night might well be the last you

spend in this castle. Hm. Oh, dear, we are in trouble.

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – Snape’s office - night

SNAPE:
You were seen by no less than seven Muggles. Do you have any idea how

serious this is? You have risked the exposure of our world. Not to mention

the damage you inflicted on a Whomping Willow that’s been on these grounds

since before you were born.

RON:
Honestly, Professor Snape, I think it did more damage to us.

SNAPE:
Silence! I assure you, that were you in Slytherin, and your fate

rested with me, the both of you would be on the train home- tonight. As it

is...

DUMBLEDORE:
...They are not.

HARRY:
Professor Dumbledore. Professor McGonagall.

SNAPE:
Headmaster, these boys have flouted the Decree for the Restriction of

Underage Wizardry. As such--

DUMBLEDORE:
I am well aware of our bylaws, Severus, having written quite a

few of them myself. However, as head of Gryffindor house, it is for Professor

McGonagall to determine the appropriate action.

RON:
We’ll go and get our stuff, then.

PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: What are you talking about, Mr. Weasley?

RON:
You’re going to expel us, aren’t you?

PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Not today, Mr. Weasley. But, I must impress on both of

you the seriousness of what you have done. I will be writing to your families

tonight, and you will both receive detention.

Scene 10:
Mandrakes; Ron’s Howler.

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – exterior - daytime

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – Greenhouse three - daytime

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Morning, everyone! Good morning, everyone!

All:
Good morning, Professor Sprout!

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Welcome to Greenhouse Three, Second Years. Now, gather

around, everyone. Today, we are going to repot Mandrakes. Who here can tell

me the properties of the Mandrake root? Yes, Miss Granger.

HERMIONE:
Mandrake, or Mandragora, is used to return those who have been

Petrified to their original state. It’s also quite dangerous. The Mandrake’s

cry is fatal to anyone who hears it.

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Excellent! Ten points to Gryffindor! Now, as our Mandrakes

are still only seedlings their cries won’t kill you yet. But they could knock

you out for several hours, which is why I have given each of you a pair of

earmuffs for auditory protection. So, could you please put them on, right

away? Quickly! Flaps tight down, and watch me closely. You grasp your

Mandrake firmly, you pull it sharply up out of the pot...

All:
Aah! Ooh!

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Got it? And... now you dunk it down into the other pot and

pour a little sprinkling of soil to keep him warm.

NEVILLE:
Uhh...

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Uh, Longbottom’s been neglecting his earmuffs.

SEAMUS:
No, ma’am, he’s just fainted.

PROFESSOR SPROUT: Yes, well, just leave him there. Right! On we go! Plenty of

pots to go around. Grasp your Mandrake, and pull it up!

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – corridor - daytime

OTHER:
There’s Nearly-Headless-Nick!

SIR NICHOLAS:
Hello, Percy. Miss Clearwater.

PERCY:
Hello, Sir Nicholas!

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime

RON:
Huhh... Say it, I’m doomed.

HARRY:
You’re doomed.

COLIN:
Hi, Harry! (flash) I’m Colin Creevy! I’m in Gryffindor, too!

HARRY:
Oh- Hi, Colin. Nice to meet you.

DEAN THOMAS:
Ron? Is that your owl?

OTHERS:
Ha-ha... Ha, ha.

RON:
Bloody bird’s a menace. Oh, no!

SEAMUS:
Look, everyone! Weasley’s got himself a Howler!

NEVILLE:
Go on, Ron. I ignored one from my gran once. It was horrible.

MRS. WEASLEY’S HOWLER: RONALD WEASLEY! HOW DARE YOU STEAL THAT CAR! I AM

ABSOLUTLEY DISGUSTED! YOUR FATHER’S NOW FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, AND IT’S

ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT! IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE, WE’LL BRING YOU

STRAIGHT HOME! Oh, and Ginny, dear, congratulations on making Gryffindor.

Your father and I are so proud! Thhhhbt!

Scene 11:
Gilderoy Lockhart.

LOCATION:
Hogwarts – DADA classroom - daytime

PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Let me introduce you to your new Defense Against the Dark

Arts teacher... me! Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary

Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-times winner of Witch

Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award- but I don’t talk about that. I didn’t get

rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at him. Huh, huh, huh... hee, hee...

Now- be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known

to wizardkind. You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room.

Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. I must ask you not to

scream. It might... provoke them!

SEAMUS:
Cornish pixies?

PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Freshly caught Cornish pixies!

SEAMUS:
Ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha...

PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Laugh if you will, Mr. Finnigan, but pixies can be

devilish tricky little blighters. Let’s see what you make of them, ha! Come

on now- round them up, round them up, they’re only pixies!

PIXIE:
Just stay there!

NEVILLE:
Ah! Aaah! Aaah! Aah- aah!

NEVILLE:
Hey, get me down!

HERMIONE:
Get off me!

HARRY:
Stop! Stop! Hold still!

PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Peskipiksi pesternomi!

PIXIE:
Hee, hee, hee!

PIXIE:
Yeeee-haw!

PIXIE:
Wheee!

PROFESSOR LOCKHART: I’ll ask you three to just nip the rest of them back into

their cage!

RON:
What do we do now?

HERMIONE:
Immobulus!

NEVILLE:
Why is it always me?

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