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Hatchet Page #5
My mama always said
that sometimes,
if a person dies
all traumatic-like,
then their spirit can get kind of
just stuck in the night they died.
Like
a poltergeist?
Like a ghost that can
physically move things?
No, like a ghost who can
rip someone to pieces
right in front of you.
I just wanna get
the hell out of here.
You know what,
Jackie Tucker?
Your tour sucks my ass.
What did you just call me?
You heard me.
Say it again!
I'll say it all night, you
fake Jackie Chan, Chris Tucker,
"I think I hear a little Emeril,"
you confused wanna-be-
Why don't you just get
off my case, a**hole?
It was an accident,
for Christ's sake!
Okay, look.
I'm going to be completely and
totally honest with you guys.
I, like-
Ooh, sh*t!
- What? What?
Ah!
Marcus, come on!
Come on!
Hey, come on!
Sh*t!
Stop. Stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop.
This isn't my fault,
all right?
Oh, really?
- Yes, really!
What, you think
I actually believe
these stupid, lame-ass
ghost stories?
Well,
I'm believing it now!
Did you see that sh*t back there?
- Guys! Guys.
I bet this means
Shapiro was here.
What a genius.
You do know the vibrator goes in
your cooch and not your ear, right?
Hey, why don't you suck
your dad off again, b*tch?
I will right after
you're done.
Fine.
- Good.
All right,
anybody got a lighter?
What are you doing?
I'll show you.
Looking for this.
What else do we got here?
"Samuel M. Barrett?"
What's that?
Shapiro.
It's his driver's license.
What?
- I don't know.
Credit card:
Samuel M. Barrett,
ten bucks, condom,
business car-
We got two sets here.
Samuel M. Barrett, Whitman
Diagnostics Senior Marketing Manager.
Doug Shapiro,
Producer/Director.
That a**hole!
I flew all the way down here
from New York, and he-
Ugh!
So he really didn't
work for Bayou Beavers?
I'm thinking no.
Dude must pretend
he's a producer
to get his own
little collection.
Good idea.
That pervert.
Why are all men
such slime?
I can't believe
I've fallen for that sh*t
three times now.
Okay, whoa, whoa.
Anyone else have
anymore secrets?
Because if I find out
someone else is lying,
I swear
I'll kill you myself.
I didn't really go to NYU.
It was my first choice,
but I didn't get in.
So I went to Hofstra.
We don't have
time for this.
I was moving to Hollywood
next month to be famous.
And now I'm going to die
with all you a**holes!
Look, we shot him,
all right?
Nobody's going to die.
Ah! Oh!
Will somebody
shut her up?
He's still alive.
No, man, he looks
dead as sh*t.
Not him...
Crowley.
Okay, you only shot him,
like, once, right?
Maybe you gotta
shoot him more times.
Like, I don't know,
four or six times.
like, six times!
I wanna keep moving!
Can we please keep moving?
I don't want to stay here!
we can see the river,
so we won't get more lost.
Shh.
Did y'all hear that?
- What?
It's over here.
What is that?
My cell phone!
# I don't wanna wait #
# For our lives to be over #
# I want to know
right now- #
We have a signal.
Oh, God.
- No, no, no.
It's a good thing.
We can call for help.
No!
Sh*t, we just went
in a huge circle!
I thought you knew
your way around here.
Oh, said the f***ing
tour guide.
Hey, I don't want to hit you,
but you're making it-
Shut the fu-
Okay, I'm gonna go check out that
barn, see if there's a weapon.
There's gotta be something
else to fight back with.
No, you can't go back
to that house.
I only have a few shots left.
We need something else.
What if it comes back?
We don't have much time.
All-
Stay here.
Cool.
- Cool.
Do you have signal
on that thing?
Come on.
Go through.
We shouldn't stay here.
We gotta keep moving.
Look, if it was ringing,
it has to work.
What? Will you just dial?
It won't let me.
Work, God damn it.
Aah!
Shh, shh, shh!
What? What?
It's my daddy and my brother.
No...
Are you sure
the number is 911?
What else would it be,
dumbass?
Well, how should I know
if it's the cell?
Maybe you have to type in
a different area code.
Oh, God.
What?
Don't move.
I said-
Sorry.
What if it's a person
and they need help?
We'll apologize later.
I think there's
a kid in there.
You're crazy.
If it was that monster,
we'd already be dead.
Screw this.
What is that?
Aw, hell, no.
I'm not walking
over there.
What if someone's hurt?
If they're still alive,
they're doing a lot better
than some people we know.
We just can't leave
someone out here to die.
Look who grew a conscience.
Look, they might need help.
Why me?
Because you have
a flashlight.
Fine. I get it.
I see how it is.
Let the brotha do it, huh?
I'm a man.
I'll walk over here.
I'm the man of the group
anyway, because I whooped you.
All right.
Oh, sh*t! Oh!
Don't touch me, man!
Damn. All right.
See if it's a little
baby in there.
Hey, baby.
You up in here?
Oh, man, it's just a stup-
Ahh!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Give me-
No...
No! Please!
Wait, wait. No.
No, wait, wait, wait-
Die, you motherf***er!
Raahr!
Aah!
No!
Ow! Sh*t! Ow!
Ow! Hold on!
- No-
I can't run!
You have to!
- What are you doing? Come on!
Shut up,
you redneck twat!
Uh!
You... hit me!
Yeah, and if you
don't shut up,
I'm going to kick
your teeth out.
You cruel, stupid, slutty-
Guys, we don't
have time for this!
I just want to make it stop.
Please, I just want
to wake up.
We have to keep moving
away from that house.
It don't matter.
This is his swamp.
He's just going
to kill us all.
There's gotta be something
that we can do.
He is trapped in the night
that he was killed.
He's angry,
and he is scared.
He's gonna mutilate
anyone that comes near him.
What if he's human?
That thing
was never human.
Oh, sh*t.
Guys, battery's not
gonna last much longer.
All right.
Let's go, let's go!
Which way?
- Um...
That way.
- Raahr!
Uhh!
Stop! Stop, guys!
Guys, stop!
This is useless.
He's just going
to keep coming for us
until we're all dead.
We can't stop running.
What else
are we going to do?
We can hurt him,
ghost or not.
Look, you saw
how fast he fell
when I stuck him
back there.
He went down
when you shot him.
How?
Missy, you got
that lighter on you?
Oh, you want to fight
that monster with my lighter?
Look, there were some
gas canisters back at the shed.
Were they full?
I don't know.
Maybe.
Wait, you want to go
back to the shed?
from the house, the safer we get.
If we don't kill him,
he'll kill us all.
You're crazy!
Man, you don't even know
if there's gas in those cans.
I know it's a better
chance than we have
running around in these woods,
getting picked off one by one.
No, you're right.
Everything is soaked.
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"Hatchet" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/hatchet_9675>.
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