Hector and the Search for Happiness Page #7

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What's in it for you?

Nothing.

Good man.

Go f*** yourself.

- (HANGING UP)

- (CHUCKLING)

Are you okay?

Yes, I'm okay.

How did the, uh,

call go with Clara?

Oh, so horrendous.

Terminal.

I'm sorry.

- You want to talk about it?

- Have we met?

Oh, right, you're Hector,

of course, you don't.

What was I thinking?

- Right, Agnes...

- Uh, yeah.

I knew you were going to

ask me about this

- and I thought about it last night.

- Uh-huh.

I have never felt so happy, really.

Or exhausted. I mean, the chaos,

sometimes it's out of control.

But, you know,

I have a job I love

and a husband I love

and two beautiful kids I love.

A home I love.

The only real shadow

on my happiness

is when I tell myself

it's too good to last.

And, Hector, the marriage,

whatever the marriage is,

the marriage itself

is never in question.

And that makes me happy.

What?

I don't know, it's just...

You know...

Thinking about

what might have been.

What?

Agnes.

- What?

- Never mind, forget it.

It's not even worth discussing.

Oh, come on, what?

What might have been?

God!

How about what is right now?

It just suits you, doesn't it,

holding on to a fantasy?

You know when you put someone

on a pedestal or on hold

or to the side or whatever

you want to call it.

Do you think

that's a compliment?

Because it's not.

It's the opposite.

And you know why?

Because I am not that fantasy.

I'm better than that fantasy.

I am real.

I got married.

I had a baby,

and then another one,

and I'm having another one.

And do you think I wanted

it to be Hector there

cutting the umbilical cord?

No, because Hector

would throw up and then faint

because you're squeamish.

You're emotionally squeamish.

You really are some kind

of weird psychiatrist,

- you know that, right?

- I... Where's...

Oh, I'm trying so hard here to

avoid the words "move"and "on",

but, for crying out loud,

I am just,

"Oh, flag that woman for,

I don't know, 12 years.

Yeah, get back to that one

when the time's right."

So, nothing, nothing,

nothing, nothing,

then, "Hi! I'm in Africa.

See you Monday."

I mean, I'm just some kind of

box you had to check, aren't I?

No...

I did love you, Hector.

But I love Alan now.

Guess what?

Whatever it is you think

you're in love with...

it's not me.

I know what you're thinking,

how much do researchers make?

(LAUGHTER)

Everything in this world

is going up...

(CHUCKLING)

yet happiness is going down.

Oh, dear, oh, dear,

oh, dear, oh, dear.

How many of us, I wonder,

can recall

a childhood moment

when we experienced happiness

as a state of being?

That single moment

of untarnished joy.

That moment when everything

in our world inside and out...

was alright.

Everything was alright.

But, now, we become

a colony of adults

and everything is all wrong

all the time.

(CHUCKLING)

It's as if we were on a quest

to get it back,

and yet the more we focus

on our own personal happiness,

the more it eludes us.

In fact, it's only when

we are otherwise engaged,

you know, focused, absorbed,

inspired, communicating,

discovering, learning,

dancing, for heaven's sake,

that we experience happiness

as a by-product, a side effect.

Oh, no.

We should concern ourselves

not so much with the pursuit

of happiness,

but with the happiness

of pursuit.

But how do we

measure happiness?

Emotions are like colors, you know.

Difficult to explain once

but not now, not anymore.

All those who read auras,

step aside,

- this is science.

- (LAUGHTER)

A new frontier in its infancy,

but not for long.

Functional electrical impedance

tomography by evoked response.

Or as I call it,

"Peeping Tom."

(LAUGHTER)

My portal into the mysterious

minutiae of human emotions.

Emotions that

for the very first time,

we can separate, specify

and quantify in actual units.

Now, this male subject

is Japanese.

Look at the abundance

of bright orange

around the happiness area,

verging on ecstasy.

It's as if the brain

was smiling.

Cause, half a liter

of warm sake.

(LAUGHTER)

And here we go again,

same Japanese gentleman,

eleven hours later,

the color of grim despondency,

verging on suicide,

otherwise known

as an excruciating hangover.

Ask yourselves,

is this worth that?

(APPLAUSE)

Oh, thank you!

You first, Agnes.

- Oh, no, no, no.

- Oh, yes, we made a deal.

Off you go into

the isolation booth.

Helmet on.

I want you to imagine yourself

in three situations.

One that makes you

very happy, one very sad,

and one very scared.

Recent memories can be useful.

Do not tell me the order,

I will guess it myself.

They say I'm a mind reader.

It's a bloody lie, I'm not.

I'm just a good diagnostician

with an awesome toy.

COREMAN:
Ready when you are.

Out you come.

As I thought,

you're an open book.

Sad, scared, happy

in that order.

- Final answer.

- Wow, yeah!

- You're good.

- Your turn, Hector.

Um, you know what,

I think I'm gonna...

- Your turn, Hector.

- Okay.

Get over yourself.

You weren't in any of mine.

Oh, right.

Sit, my dear.

By way of identifying

the emotions,

I've assigned a color to each

corresponding part of the brain.

It's pretty obvious, really.

Sunny yellow, happy,

ice blue, sad,

battery-acid green, fear.

It corrodes you, you know.

PROFESSOR COREMAN: Right.

Sad, scared, happy,

don't tell me the order,

and be specific.

It's all about specificity.

(SHOUTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)

- Shut up!

- Stop, please!

That's odd.

It's as if he's filtering,

moderating his feelings.

Something's holding him back,

some kind of barrier.

No, no, no, these are not

the emotions of a grown man.

Tell me about it.

He's going to have

to dig a lot deeper.

There is no deeper.

PROFESSOR COREMAN: I must admit,

I'm a little baffled.

Hi, this is Hector.

I think I can go deeper.

Oh, f***,

we left the mic on.

Oh, well.

I think I know where to go.

Courage, Hector,

we're right there with you.

(PHONE RINGING)

This is Hector,

who the hell is this?

(CLARA SOBBING)

I wanted to be a mother.

Just...

Just not yours.

Clara, um, listen,

don't go anywhere, okay?

Just... just stay there, okay?

Hang on.

Professor, can we stop?

I need to take this call.

Alright.

Please, please.

Uh, Clara, Clara,

are you still there?

- Yes, I'm here, yeah.

- HECTOR:
Thank, God!

Clara, listen.

I'm sorry I didn't give you

any explanation

for this insane journey,

but the truth is,

I didn't really have

any reasons of my own.

I didn't explain it to myself.

(STAMMERING) I have

learned a lot, you know.

I've learned a lot about happiness.

And I've learned about unhappiness.

And the thing

that makes me most unhappy

is the thought that

I might lose you.

And the thing that makes me

happiest is the thought

that I could become the man

that you would want to spend

the rest of your life with.

Oh!

I miss my Hector.

I miss my Clara.

(SOBBING)

Hector, keep going.

AGNES:
You're knocking

it out of the park.

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