Hollywood Ending Page #8

Synopsis: Val Waxman is a film director who was once big in the 1970's and 1980's, but has now has been reduced to directing TV commercials. Finally, he gets an offer to make a big film. But, disaster strikes, when Val goes temporarily blind, due to paranoia. So, he and a few friends, try to cover up his disability, without the studio executives or the producers knowing that he is directing the film blind.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): Woody Allen
Production: DreamWorks SKG
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
6.6
Metacritic:
46
Rotten Tomatoes:
46%
PG-13
Year:
2002
112 min
$4,781,031
Website
391 Views


...even if Galaxie made an exception...

...these actors are not going

to allow it.

Come here. Sit down.

- Why?

- I need your help.

Okay. What can I do for you?

This isthe end of the line for Val

if he doesn't have ahit.

He will. He could do this material

with his eyes closed.

Right. But if for any reason

he strikes out here...

...his last hopes

for a career are over!

Al, let me put your mind at ease.

While the dailies are not

what I expected...

...I'm sure he has a vision.

Don't worry about it.

Look, if aproblem came up...

...alittle problem where he needed

alittle behind-the-scenes support...

...for the last few weeks,

you'd, you'd...

I'm startingto get

that Val Waxman chill.

What's going on?

Can I level with you?

No, I mean, really level.

Pull no punches.

What is it, Al?

It's nothingthat can't be dealt with.

He's just... he's blind.

You want to be serious? Because

we're already behind schedule.

The cameramanthrew his little fit

andthings are going crazy...

He's blind. He can't see at all.

But don't panic.

It's not atumor, or...

...a disease of the optic nerve.

It's not permanent. It's... it's...

What is it?

It's apsychological disorder.

It's psychosomatic. That happens.

This is not happening.

It's not happening.

He's onthe set now faking it,...

but someone hasto help him get

throughthe rest of the picture.

The rest of the picture? What...

How long hasthis been going on?

Since day one.

The Chinese translator...

...was his secret agent till now,

but now he's gone.

We need someone who can stay close

to him and not look suspicious.

Are youtelling me he has directed

everything up to this point blind?!

No one knows. He didn't want

his career destroyed...

...by another disaster story

about his work problems. No one knows...

...andthat's because

of the translator and me.

No one must find out.

I'm serious, Al.

Nobody. Not anybody onthe crew...

...not the drivers, the actors,

not anyone from Galaxie.

I knew you'd understand.

May the day June 19th rot in hell

for all eternity.

- Isthat the day you married Val?

- It'sthe day he was born!

Now don't get upset, please.

No wonder he's been avoiding me

and acting so strange.

He didn't want anybody to know.

That self-destructive...

Psychosomatically blind!

That hypochondriacal neurotic.

And I say that with all due respect!

You campaigned

for himto get this job.

No one must know.

Yes, and what you have to do...

...is be his eyes

for these last couple of weeks.

You've mellowed.

No more impossible neurotic symptoms!

I should have had my head examined!

I thought I had abraintumor!

Be sympathetic!

You couldn't get atumor if youtried.

You're not mature enough.

What can I do? If the picture fails,

I go downthe drain!

- If Hal finds out...

- He won't. It'sthe home stretch.

What is making you blind?

When will it stop?

Did youtalkto your analyst?

What did he say?

He doesn't have a clue.

He just doesn't know.

That's just great.

What are you goingto do?

Edit it blind, too?

Put inthe music blind?

Go to the premier blind? At least

you won't be able to readthe reviews.

What if it doesn't leave me?

What if I stay blind?

I don't know. I'll be in California

at my swimming pool.

You'll probably have to learn Braille,

get a dog, workthe subway.

- Aren't you goingto put me to bed?

- Put youto bed?

I can't do it by myself!

Al always puts me to bed!

Oh, God. Val, isthis project headed

for disaster?

Relax. I can handle it.

Beethoven did his symphonies

while he was deaf.

Are you comparing yourself

to Beethoven?

Can we not get

in amusical discussion?

How could you do this and not think

about anybody else?

I mean, this is my movie, you know?

Everybody's givingtheir life's blood.

Give me abreak. Everyone's getting

paidtop dollar.

You're marrying abillionaire.

Only I go inthe toilet if things fail.

I don't think Hal's going

to see it that way.

Hal won't know, unless

youtell him during pillowtalk.

Youtwo probably

don't have pillowtalk.

He probably has sex with you

while he's onthe phone.

You're fine. I'll see youtomorrow.

Don't go! You have to put me to bed.

Al alwaystucks me in.

He's your agent. There's no limit

to what they do.

Ellie, come on.

You usedto be very maternal

toward me.

You were infantile. You needed it.

Except in bed.

Then you were ahot number.

I was a small-town girl and you were

onthe cutting edge of everything.

How'd I go fromthe cutting edge

to the buttering edge?

How'd I end up inthis mess?

This is not the first time

we've been introuble.

We've been in some pretty

sticky situations.

- Not like this.

- Yes, because I can recallthem.

You know, it wasn't all...

We've had our share of...

...situations, no question about it.

Like losing our car in a crap game?

Absolutely. That was a disaster.

I told youthen... never trust amale

with a fixed nose...

...but you didn't listen.

It was humiliating for us.

Do you remember...

...staying up all night in Paris

listeningto jazz and ending up in jail?

To this day, I can't figure out

how you got us in jail.

Me? As I recall,

it was your shoplifting.

Because you wanted chocolate croissants

and I left my wallet at the hotel.

You were so demanding allthe time.

No, it was your command of the language.

Never use the familiar with apoliceman.

It's funny, because

my unfulfilled life dream...

...wasthat you and I would live

in Paristogether.

I was willing. You were the one

who always lost your nerve.

It's funny... it seems

like so long ago now.

It's amazing howthings change, isn't it?

Yep, they do.

Andthose days are over.

I'll see youtomorrow.

Your agent will come inthe morning

to take youto the bathroom.

The movie is in its last two weeks.

Val Waxman's ex-wife, who was very

hands off when shooting began...

...is now very much involved.

I notice that Val relies alot on her.

They are in constant conference.

They lunchtogether every day and,

I suppose, discussthe work.

She isthe only one besides

the cameraman and newtranslator...

...who Val allowsto see the dailies.

- How were they?

- Really great. Really great.

Great. Great.

Everything's going fine.

The dailies are really great...

...and we're pretty much

on schedule.

I had my doubts, but you proved me

wrong. Maybe he is anew man.

Great. Really. Right.

I'm coming in for the last few days.

I have business.

There'sthe wrap party

and I'm being honored at a dinner...

...and Val and I should have

aprivate talk about...

...post-production and editing.

Have our picture takento dispel

the rumors we didn't get along.

Yeah, that's right. All right.

Take care. Can't wait to see you.

Quick union question... can ahyphenate

marry abelow-the-line person?

That's for legal.

I have to tell you

about my nightmare.

I dreamt last night that...

...Hal found out everything.

That he... somehow...

...just knewthat I was...

...blind andthat I had been blind

Rate this script:2.5 / 2 votes

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, and playwright, whose career spans more than six decades. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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