Home Movie Page #5

- See you in the kitchen.

- Okay!

All right?

Cutest kids in the world.

I'm gonna do

a little recap for the kids.

10 years ago,

Easter, you and I?

Oh, Mr. Romance.

Yes, children,

your father was walking

out of a church,

looked across the quad.

He spotted your mother,

the patented

David Poe charm kicked in and...

You could almost hear it.

We got to talking.

Yeah, you got to talking.

I got to staring,

wondering what you were

doing with a Bible in your hand.

Mm-hmm, and she said

with all requisite sarcasm...

"Are Jehovah's Witnesses

and other religious types

allowed to flirt with co-eds?"

I said, "No, Jehovah's Witnesses

are not required

by law to flirt

with co-eds, however...

Lutherans are."

And I explained...

Yes, with a great deal

of condescension, I might add.

...with a great deal

of condescension

that if she had any doubts

about this fact,

that she might want to present herself

at the divinity school kegger

on Friday night at midnight

because the Theology department

at Harvard is, bar none,

party central on campus.

- That was our first date.

- It was our first date.

And you didn't think the beer

was good enough for me

- so you brought, um...

- Come.

- Um, you brought me...

- A box of wine.

- A box of wine.

- Wine that comes from a box.

- Mr. Romance.

- Johnny Romance.

And I asked you

what could

a psychiatrist and a pastor

- ever have in common and...

- I said, "Faith."

...and you said faith.

- Faith.

That the two of us, more than any other

people, could actually help people.

That's right.

And I do love you,

but I don't believe in Freud.

That's okay.

I don't believe in God.

That's okay. He believes in you.

He believes in this family.

That makes three of us.

Oh.

Hmm.

Is that a carrot in your pocket

or are you just happy to see me?

As a matter of fact...

Oh my God.

...it is a carrot.

That came from

the strangest place.

- Would you like a bite of my carrot?

- You know I would.

- See?

- Why, I oughta...

Junior filmmaker bunny.

Mr. Bunny, Mr. Filmmaker.

Jack, Emily! Come on down,

it's time to hunt for Easter eggs!

That's the TV.

It's so frickin' loud.

"Frickin"'?

Yeah, I said frickin', sorry.

Jack, Emily!

Hey, the TV.

It's so loud...

- Hey, what's up?

- They're not here.

- They're not here? What do you mean?

- I don't know.

Jack?

Emily?

Oh, what's reeking?

Oh, Jack.

No.

No.

Oh God.

Because it's Easter Sunday

and our children are minors...

DCFS, against our better wishes,

has given us custody

of our children

until the court

arraignment tomorrow.

Tonight will be

their last night in this house.

Tomorrow they will be

charged as minors...

with, uh, one count of

unlawful restraint,

one count attempted murder

with a provision llI clause

of juvenile detention

until the age of 18.

Tomorrow morning,

Jack and Emily are...

Gonna go away.

Like Abraham

sacrificed Isaac,

so we must sacrifice

our children.

But even still...

I love my children.

How can I not love my son

and my baby girl?

Come on. Come on.

Honey.

- What?

- We can stop.

No.

- Come on, let's finish.

- No no no.

We're not gonna show this...

to anyone,

so we're not

talking to anyone.

We are talking

to ourselves.

Understand that?

We're talking to ourselves.

I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.

- That's okay.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

DCFS, against our better wishes,

has given us custody

of our children

until the court

arraignment tomorrow.

Hi, and welcome to

"The Jack and Emily Show."

I'm Jack.

I'm Emily.

Let's have some fun.

You're quiet in there.

I can't even hear you,

but I know you're there.

Let's have

a staring contest.

I dare you to stare

until our movie's done.

I bet you

you can't.

- Jack!

- Please stop!

Stop! Oh my God!

Stop it!

Oh, God, please!

Jack, stop!

Jack, what are you doing?

Stop it! Stop!

Please!

And action.

Untie me, untie me.

- I'm gonna call the police!

- Untie me.

Untie me!

They cut... they cut

the phone lines.

Take the baseball bat.

- Get the f***ing bat.

- What?

- Get the bat, Clare.

- Where?

It's upstairs in Jack's room.

I can't go up there.

It's dark up there.

Take the camera.

There's a light on the camera.

There's a switch on the side.

Get the f***ing bat.

Where's the...

where's the light?

- It's on the side!

- How do you turn on the light?

By the handle on the side!

Clare!

Clare!

Clare! Clare!

Go! Go!

Jack! Emily!

Stop this sh*t right now!

You listen to your father.

Untie me.

Un-f***ing-tie me!

Jack! Emily!

Jack.

All right, guys, I can see you

so you don't move, okay?

If you move, I will break every bone

in your f***ing body, do you understand?

David?

David!

- Yeah.

- Do you have everything?

- Just one more bag.

- Okay.

- Are you okay?

- I'm fine.

Are you sure?

- Honey, are you sure you're okay?

- I just have a headache.

- That's awfully bright.

- Sorry sorry.

All right, you guys. This is it.

You are leaving this house.

You are not our children.

I don't know what you are.

You stay right there. David?

David?

Oh my God. David?

Honey? Honey?

Oh my God. David?

Oh my God.

Oh my God!

Oh my God! Oh my God!

What did you do?

Oh my God.

Oh my God,

did they drug us?

Oh my God.

You f***ing drugged us!

No!

Get back!

Get the f***...!

Get back!

Help!

Help! Help!

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