Home On The Range Page #6
And l don't believe what l see.
MRS. CALOWAY:
Oh, it's Buck!MAGGlE:
Stallion of the Cim-moron.
l'm supposed to be here
just in case...
one of the horses get tired.
Cows only.
Look, friend, you don't
understand my situation.
No, you don't understand...
so l'll say it again.
The only critters
that get by me are cows.
Cows only.
Oh, come on!
Look, cut me a break.
[Moo]
Now what?
Aww, what are you doing here?
Ha ha! Sorry we're late.
We got separated from the herd.
Right this way, little lady.
Tell 'em Junior sent you.
Ohhh...
-Howdy, partner!
-Ahem.
-Nice hat, ma'am.
-Oh! Cheeky devil.
Excuse me, reject.
Coming through.
Oh! Hey, what gives?!
How come
they got to go through?
They're cows.
What?!
But what about the rabbit?
Well, obviously,
he was with the cows.
Ha! l'm with the cows, too!
Yeah! Hey! Hey, cows! W-wait up!
You got to tell this guy
you know me!
See, Junior, we're old friends!
Come on, Margie! Uh, Gretchen!
Miss, uh--uh, Hat Cow!
Come on,
it's your old pal Buck, see?
Buck...Buck...
Oh, Buck!
Nah, doesn't ring a bell.
No, no, no, wait!
Hey, come back! No!
Hang on--hang on a second.
Heh heh heh.
They're just kidding.
You see, if you could--
Oh, hey! Hey!
Hey, cows! Cows! Oof!
Don't make me hurt you.
Heh heh.
Rico. [Laughs]
l gotta go, but let's throw on
the old feedbag sometime.
Stay cool.
Ha ha ha! lt's hero time.
LUCKY JACK:
So what's the plan?
Well, let's see...
You two get his attention
while l sneak up behind him...
and then
l'll knock him into the cart...
and then we'll rope him up
and wheel him to justice!
And for extra measure...
how about we conk him
on the noggin with this?
You go, cowgirl!
That's usin' the old hat.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Now, you lost me here, missy.
Look, Jack, it's simple.
Cart, smack, rope, roll,
justice. Come on, Jack, focus.
Now is not the time to get
all scatterbrained and flaky.
[Chuckling]
Oh, good, l'm not too late.
Sorry. Still stakin' out
your quarry, huh?
Yeah, pretty much. Why?
Listen, l came to warn you, one
equine to another, about Rico.
As soon as he nabs
that rustler...
he's gonna be in a big hurry
to collect that reward.
-So?
-So?!
Once he catches his man, that's
when the horsewhip comes out...
and he's not shy
about using it, either!
-Horsewhip?
-Horsewhip!
And not only are you
gonna be carrying Rico...
but that rustler as well.
Have you seen that guy?
He's huge!
What should l do?
-Run!
-OK.
Yeah, run like the wind,
partner, and save yourself!
l'm going!
Go on, take off! Fade!
Ride into the sunset!
-All righty, l'm outta here!
-Aah! Scram!
OK, thanks, buddy!
l owe you one!
Godspeed, my friend!
So long, sucker! Ha ha!
He must be takin' stupid lessons
from that buffalo.
[Snorts]
Uh-oh.
-1,420...
-4,334...
-4,335...
-1 ,435...
-1 ...
-4,336...
-Ohh!
-4,337...
Can't you morons
count to yourselves?
Come on.
Gotta start all over!
-There he is.
-Come on, let's go!
Hold on!
You're both forgetting
Slim's hypnotic control...
over those
with less than perfect pitch.
Jack, l hope you can forgive me.
-For what, missy? Aah!
-For that.
Now, you watch it there, toots!
Grace, how practical!
Done countin'!
-What do we got?
-4,997.
-What?
-Huh? Wait, wait, what?
l thought you said 5,000 even.
Of course l did. Gil must've
just miscounted, that's all.
[Grace moos]
Huh?
PHlL:
There's one up there!The others can't be far behind.
Just you watch.
You're gonna like this.
Yodeling's an art.
Ahem.
[Yodeling Ride of the Valkyries]
Huh?
[Yodeling]
Ha ha ha!
What's the deal, Slimbo?
Maybe she wasn't an art lover.
Philistine!
Shut up, you greenhorns!
A bovine ain't been born
that can resist my charms.
Ahem. [Thump]
[Yodeling 1812 Overture]
[Cart rattling]
Watch your back, Uncle Slim!
Got you!
Where do you think you're going?
[Nervous laugh]
[Moo]
Ooh!
-Now, Jack!
-OK!
What in the rootin'-tootin'
blazes is goin' on here?!
Whoo-ha!
[Clang]
Ohh!
BOTH:
Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
GRACE:
Let's get outta here!-Aah!
-Come back here, dog meat!
-Jackpot!
-We got him now!
-Well done!
-Watch out!
lt's Buck!
Hey, Casey Jones...
grab the bills
and fire up the getaway express!
[Buck screaming]
[Junior snorts]
[Mooing]
l gave up clown college
for this?
BUCK:
Aah! Aah! Ooh! Mama!Ooh.
lt's Slim! l got Slim!
Rico's gonna be so proud of me!
[Squeals] Thank you!
Whoa! Whoa! Ooh! Leave me alone!
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
[Panting] Aah!
[Screaming]
[Screech]
Yaaah-hoo-hoo-hooey!
-Sorry.
-Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
-Quick, girls, in here!
-Ooh!
MAGGlE:
Ooh![Screaming]
Hey!
[Neighs]
Huh?
[Screech]
That was Rico!
[Thump]
[Snorts]
What in blue blazes?
[Crash]
Ohh!
[Crash]
JUNlOR:
l'll knock youinto next Tuesday!
Come back here!
-Whoa! Whoa!
-You're going down!
Junior! Junior!
-Oh! Whoa!
-Junior!
Junio-o-or! Whoo-hah!
-Get this off of me!
-Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
[Thump]
[Gasps] Rico's saddle!
l'm wearing Rico's saddle!
[Neighs]
Aah!
Aaah!
-Uncle Slim! Oof!
-Ohh!
-Surprise!
-Oof!
-Aah! Eee!
-Aah! Dang!
[Screech]
[Clanging]
[Sizzling]
[Screech]
[Screaming]
[Boom]
[Screaming]
Oof! Oof! Oof! Aah! Unh!
MAGGlE:
We made it, girls!We made it!
-Three cheers!
-Hip-hip-hooray!
Ladies, we got company!
Ohh...oh!
[Chugging]
Aaah! Aah!
Whoa! Stop! Stop! Hit the brake!
Look out!
[Crash]
[Clattering]
[Squeak]
[Clang]
[Bird chirping]
[Slim shouting]
Yaah! Dagnabit!
around here myself!
[Grunting]
Call me crazy, but l think
these cows got it in for me.
Maybe they just don't like
your singing.
Shut up! Ahem.
Mr. Weaseley,
my money, if you please.
Heh heh heh. l was just
keeping it safe for you, Slim.
Sure you were.
Protecting my investments
is what l pay this fellow for.
Mr. Weaseley, let me present...
the most traitorous,
double-crossin' gun for hire...
that l've ever had the pleasure
to call partner--Rico.
You're too kind, boss.
No, it can't be.
His reputation as
a bounty hunter is well-known...
but lately he's been doing
a little moonlighting...
and covering my tracks.
Rico's going to see you
to the border...
so that nothing else goes wrong.
Tck-tck.
[Screech]
Now, if you'll all pardon me...
there's
on the auction block
this morning.
[Gasps]
He's going to buy our farm!
Adios! Yee-haw!
l don't know
how you got here, skittish...
but stick with me,
and you may get to like...
the other side of the law.
Get on there! Hyah!
WESLEY:
All right, come on! Come on!
Move it, Bessie! Get in there!
Hurry up!
You don't want to be late...
for that big round-up
in the sky!
[Neighs]
Hah! Skittish, whoa!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Get in there!
Come on, you stupid cows!
[Mooing]
Come on!
Unh!
[Thump]
WESLEY:
Lovely.Now get the engine fired up...
and let's make tracks.
[Buck neighs]
[Humming]
0 fans
Submitted on August 05, 2018
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"Home On The Range" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/home_on_the_range_10098>.
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