Homewrecker Page #3

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No, no... you... no...

you werent weird, Okay?

I'm the weird...

I'm weird.

Um, s...

I'm really happy for you.

And I wish you the best of luck, I do.

thanks.

Okay.

Charles.

Mike.

I'm gonna take that to go now.

How much?

dollars, please.

thank you.

Sir.

Oh. thank you.

I really like your shoes.

thanks.

Mike, come in

Yo, Mike, come in for Jimmy

Yo, Mike,come in, bro!

Yo, Mike, you see that button

fight next to your thumb?

Press it, bro, that's the talk button,

press that mother f***er,

talk to me come in

Alright Mike, come

in come in for Jim...

Just... f*** it.

You see where

it says "Office?"

The blue one? You got the key clip

or you got the other one, the red one.

Great, thank you.

You're welcome.

Mike, What's the matter

with your cricket, man?

You just got to press

and talk, that's it.

Yeah. Hey, Jimmy,

U m...

You got two more jobs here

and Johnny's gotta go to Queens

Johnny, can you take

these two tickets?

they're both Medeco cylinders.

Jimmy...

Yo, can you move, man? Let me see?

What?

can you f***ing

move so I can see?

F***ing move, man!

Jimmy...

What?

I lost the van.

You... you What?

I lost it. I had r Irdy sitting inside

and I just left for a second.

So you're telling me that

the van is stolen, right?

No, I don't... I don't

think she stole it.

So... then...

where is it?

I left her a message.

You left who a message?

The job Irdy.

You left the Irdy a message?

Yeah.

How beautiful is that?

Did you tell her,

man, please, can you return

the 20, 000 dollar van

with the 10, 000 dollar

f***ing won'th of tools?

Mike, What the f***

am I supposed to do?

They could send you back

upstate for this, man.

They're gonna think you stole it.

You know I'm not even supposed

to be sending you out on lockouts.

Your ass is supposed to be here.

You're supposed to be

doing the keys, the shifter.

Guys, what's going on?

Nothing

Jimmy.

You know, this is What I get for hiring

f***-herds off

work-release like you, man.

What the f***, man?

What the f*** was she doing

in the van in the first place?

She was, like, upset

and she was crying,

and then I wanted to do

something good for her...

Mike, What about me?

I'm trying to do something good for you,

and this is

how you repay me?

You fist-f*** me in the

ass? What the f***, man?

Helo Hi

Mike, I'm sorry,I moved the van

because you were gonna get a ticket.

Is this the Irdy with the van?

Yeah.

Let me see them keys, please?

Here.

I'm taking you off the road,

I'm putting Johnny on

You're lucky I don't tell Joe.

Could I just say something?

I'd just like to say something.

I just wanted to let

you know how incredible

Mike was with my lock today.

Really

Absolutelly incredible

And he, was really meticulous,

and, like,really professional,

and quick. He just

totally saved my life.

Quick?

I wasnt that quick.

You were gone for,

like, What, three hours?

Well, I had lost

all of my keys

so every single lock

had to be replaced.

I'm glad we were

able to assist you

Yes, and I'm so sorry

that I inconvenienced you.

My name is Margo.

My name is Jimmy.

Hey, Jimmy.

Nice to meet you too.

Yeah.

Is this your place?

I'm the manger here.

Whoa!

God, it's huge in here,

it's so much bigger than

it looks like outside.

It's like full of stuff.

Every thing's in here.

All, everything.

How many guys are

you in charge of?

Four or five.

What?

Holy sh*t.

that must be exhausting.

It is.

Yeah.

Wow.

Well, I'm glad to meet you and...

thank you. I'm so glad to have met you.

Likewise. Is there anything

else we can do for you today?

Well, I want Mike.

Excuse me?

I just need Mike... to install

the most expensive,

extensive lock system ever.

We could do that.

We have Medeco,

we have the Mult-Locks,

police locks...

Yeah. All,the whole thing.

Yeah, we could do that.

What about this? This

metal thing? How about this?

that'll be 260 plus installation...

Okay, cool.

can Mike do it?

You know, we could

have Johnny do it

because he does

real quick work.

But I really prefer Mike...

You should go with

Johnny, he's the best.

I'd like Mike.

I think you'd...

Johnny's better.

Is there something

going on here?

No, I just think he's a

really amazing locksmith

and I'd like him to

take care of my door.

Mm-mm. Mike is done for the dry. Okay?

I want Mike.

I'm really sorry

I got you in trouble.

I'm so so sorry.

Yeah, Okay.

Are you mad at me?

Listen, I'm really sorry about it.

It's just... There really

was r ticket guy there.

He was just, like, looming over me,

just, like,threatening me.

And... I writed for you,

and I writed and writed,

and then we must've

just missed each other.

Okay.

I'm really sorry.

Let's go.

Ah, f***.

So, did you

talk to him?

yeah.

What did he say?

He said... he had a girlfriend.

And that she was nice

Did he say he just had one girlfriend?

Yeah.

Oh.

Seatbelt, please.

there's only two kinds of

people, as far as I can tell

The terminally il

And the worried well

every time I've tried to

climb out of this wishing well

I've only made it up

Just high enough

To hurt when I fell

So, what advice

did he give you?

He didn't. It was

quick So where we going?

So you didn't actually

find anything out?

Yeah. He said

he had a girlfriend.

Did he name names?

No, I didn't ask.

Oh.

So where are we herded?

Just drive.

Where's your apartment again?

Can you just drive?

No

Why?

cause I pay my own gas.

I pay my own tickets,

so it all cost money.

Okay, so pull over,

I don't care.

We have to install your hardware!

No, I don't need any of that sh*t.

I just wanted to

finish this conversation,

and find out what Charles said.

Okay. Why don't you

just tell me What to do.

You want me to go

from "A" to "B,"

I can do that but I... I

cant do this, Okay?

So just give me an address!

can you do that?

Okay, Okay.

Calm down.

I can, just a minute,

I'm gonna think about it.

No! You know wha... I... I cant, Okay?

I... I really want

to help you out

but this,this is just...

you know, I... I...

I cant lose my job.

Okay? I cant screw things up, Okay?

Okay.

Seriously, this is...

this is burning me down.

Okay, Okay.

I'm sorry.

Listen, just chill

out, just hold on,

every thing's gonna

be fine. I promise.

Listen, I'm sorry, I didn't

mean to burn you down.

Okay, I'm gonna make it up to you.

have you eaten today?

No.

Okay!

See? Every thing's so much

worse when you haven't eaten.

What kind of food

do you feel like?

I'd like a baby Ruth.

What's a baby Ruth?

It's candy. It's like a candy bar.

I'm diabetic. I'm technically

not supposed to eat it.

It spikes my sugar.

They didn't have

any baby Ruths.

What's that song?

What song?

It's, like, about a man

eating ice cream in the park.

I don't think I know it.

No, it's a guy who's eating

ice cream in the park.

Singing Italian songs

I'm sure I don't know it.

No, no, no, no,

you do. It's, like,

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