Hoodwinked

[film reel whirring]

[man] Red Riding Hood,

you probably know the story.

[girl screaming]

But there's more to every tale

than meets the eye.

lt's just like they always say,

you can't judge a book by its cover.

lf you want to know the truth,

you've gotta flip through the pages.

Granny!

lt's me, Red!

ls everything OK?

Oh, yeah, sure thing. Oome on in.

What?

- Who are you?

- l'm your grandma.

Your face looks really weird, Granny.

l've been sick. l...

Your mouth doesn't move when you talk.

Plastic surgery.

Grandma's had a little work done.

Now, come on over here.

Let's have a look at you.

So, what's going on, Grandma?

This and that, doing a lot of quilting.

So you got the loot?

Whoa. What big hands you have.

Oh, all the better

to scratch my back with.

- And what big ears you have!

- All the better to hear your...

...many criticisms!

Old people just have big ears, dear.

And Granny, what big eyes you have!

Are we just gonna sit around here

and talk about how big l'm getting?

You came here for a reason. So tell

old Granny what you got in the basket.

Ah, Granny! What bad breath you have!

- All right!

- Ah!

You again? What do l have to do,

get a restraining order?

Settle down, little girl. l'm on to you.

- Hai-ya!

- Save it, Red Fu.

You been dodging me all day,

but now you might as well give up.

Ahh! [gasping]

Ha!

You crazy wolf!

What have you done with Granny?

l'm taking Granny down, and you're next!

- [Red] Granny!

- lt's you! But you...

- [glass breaks]

- [all screaming]

[sirens blare]

[helicopter blades whir]

[siren wails, tires screech]

[reporters clamoring]

[reporter 1] Ohief Grizzly,

are the suspects

- connected with the Goody Bandit?

- Yeah, uh...

No. Don't print that, Maxine.

We don't know anything yet.

[reporter 2] ls the house

made of gingerbread?

- Don't think so.

- Do bears eat gingerbread?

That's enough with the questions.

Jerry, come on! Get these people back!

All right, back it up!

Let the chief do his job!

Oome on, you, with the feathers,

back behind the snake.

l just want to go home and hibernate.

- Bill!

- Ohief!

- All right, what do we got?

- lt's a domestic disturbance.

Breaking and entering, wielding an ax

without a license, intent to eat.

l get it. Any connection

with the recipe robberies?

You mean the Goody Bandit? Oould be.

The house belongs to Granny Puckett.

- The cookbook lady?

- Yeah, that's the one.

[chief] Hmm.

OK, Paul Bunyan was swinging the ax,

and Wolfie was trying to eat Lil' Bit.

- All right, get a muzzle on that guy.

- l can explain everything.

You can explain it to the judge.

- Shouldn't you be in school?

- Shouldn't l have a lawyer?

Uh... What are you doing?

- Hey. We was just...

- l was just smelling it.

- Don't eat that. That's evidence.

- Right.

[roars]

All right, so this looks

pretty open-and-shut.

Little Miss Rosy Oakes making covert

deliveries to the goody tycoon,

Wolfie tries to eat 'em both,

then Orazy Flannel Pants with the ax

here busts in swinging vigilante-style.

Take 'em downtown, boys.

lt's the woods, chief.

We don't have a downtown.

You know what l mean.

Just book 'em!

[male voice] Not so fast, Grizzly.

That's the problem with you bears,

always growling up the wrong tree.

- Hey, Nicky!

- You on the case, Nick?

No, just stopping by

to have a sarsaparilla.

Say, Tommy, you lose some weight?

- Uh, no.

- Didn't think so.

Nicky Flippers. What are you

doing here? This is my case.

Well, someone hibernated

on the wrong side of the cave.

l saw the lights,

thought the circus was in town.

Now, of course, l see l was right.

You're too late, Nicky.

l got this case all wrapped up.

- ls that right?

- Yeah.

[Red] They got us all wrong,

Mr. Flippers.

Oh, l don't know,

you look pretty dangerous to me.

- What's your name?

- Red.

- And why do they call you that?

- Why do they call you ''Flippers''?

[dance music plays]

Go Flippers

- Jump! Get on!

- Go Flippers

Go Flippers

Go Flippers

- [cheering]

- Uh, no reason.

They call me Red

because of this red hood l wear.

- What about when you're not wearing it?

- l usually wear it.

Recipes have come up missing

all over the forest.

Goody shops have been

going out of business for months,

and the trail ends here.

l got a case to close.

Slow down, chief. We've got four

suspects, and that means four stories,

and if you get people talking long

enough, someone will spill the beans.

- [snorts] Beans?

- Oould l just make a quick phone call?

Aaah!

l'll tell you what happened.

What's with the handcuffs on a girl?

Her wrists could slip right out.

- How about a cage?

- Bring in the cage!

- l was being sarcastic.

- Sarcasm. Strike the cage.

[chief] All right,

get the cuffs off her.

[pencil sharpener whirs]

So, Red, why don't you explain

how this all began?

Well, like any other day.

l was making deliveries

for my Granny's goody shop.

# Ba ba ba-da-ba-da

# Ba ba

# Ba ba ba ba

# Ba ba ba

# Here's a story l hope

# You'll like

# lt's the one about the girl

riding on her bike

- # l know

- Hi, Red!

# lt's a tired old tale

but it still rings true

- Hey, Red.

- # She could never be rude

- # Or unkind

- Hey!

# But a sad song played

at the back of her mind

# Oh

# Oan someone show me a different day

# To take me away

# Take me out of the woods

# Great big world

# You know what l'm wanting for you

# You know what l'm wanting for you

# What l'm wanting for you

# Wanting for you

Ahh!

# Oh ##

Hey, Red!

Oh! Nice outfit. Always red with you.

- You must be in autumn.

- Hey, Boingo.

Aren't you helping the Muffin Man today?

Oh, he closed up shop.

Someone took all his recipes last night,

and now l'm out of a job.

Gee, Boingo, l'm really sorry.

Are you still running the cable car?

Yeah, yeah, l am.

But it's nothing like

making goodies all day.

Would a carrot crumpet

make you feel better?

Oh, boy, oh, boy! Thanks, Red.

l can always count on you to deliver,

you little rascally devil.

Yeah, well, the woods

don't go around by themselves.

[door closes]

Shut it down.

[# Daniel Rogers: Little Boat]

- Oome on, let's go.

- Where are we going now, Mama?

[Red] With the Goody Bandit

on the loose,

recipes were becoming

an endangered species.

l decided to call Granny.

lf anyone would know what to do,

she would.

l don't know what to do.

l'm just a tired old lady.

Your recipes are the most famous

in the whole forest, Granny.

What if they get swiped?

lt could wipe you out.

Maybe l should bring you

the recipe book, for safekeeping.

A trip up the mountain

is too dangerous for a little girl.

l'm not so little anymore.

Please, dear, you just keep the recipes

there, and everything will be fine.

- But...

- l have to go now. My program's on.

- Kisses.

- [sighs]

What you reading, Red?

''Far Away Places''?

- Are you going somewhere far away?

- No. The world is too dangerous.

Oan't see! Danger! Turn into the skid!

Rate this script:4.5 / 2 votes