How High Page #7

Synopsis: Two guys by the name of Silas and Jamal decided to one day smoke something magical, which eventually helps them to ace their college entrance exam. This eventually lands them in Harvard, where they're surrounded by the world of Ivy Leaguers. Although their new lifestyle is much different from back home, they kept on having fun until their supernatural smoke runs out. Now, they are on their own and they have to rely on each other to survive.
Genre: Comedy, Fantasy
Director(s): Jesse Dylan
Production: Universal Pictures
 
IMDB:
6.3
Metacritic:
29
Rotten Tomatoes:
26%
R
Year:
2001
93 min
$31,155,435
Website
3,170 Views


Ow! Oh, God!

Now go to time-out.

Go to your room.

I wonder who this could be.

Oh, my goodness.

Honey, look at this.

I wonder

who these are from.

Dear Carl, saw these

and thought of you.

Love, Mrs. Ray.

It's my old schoolmarm!

I haven't heard from her

in years!

Oh, how sweet.

She knows

I love brownies.

Mmm! A little piece

of heaven.

Better than mine?

Darling, I don't remember

you cooking brownies.

You're right, I don't.

Hurry up, darling,

you're going to make us late,

and you know I hate to be late.

All right.

I'll take these upstairs.

I'll have another one.

They're great.

This is how we do it

Throw me a beer,

you big weenie!

- This is how we do it

- Whoo!

Lovell House!

Life is hell.

What up, fellas?

What's up?

- How was the trip?

- Good. Good.

I see Monks couldn't make it,

so I brought my man

I Need Money.

- Is he any good?

- He don't talk.

He speaks with his hands.

Right, right.

You have a good show.

I'm out.

Hey, hey, hey.

Don't f*** up tonight,

all right?

What the f***

is the plate for, man?

Gonna be a long night.

You know Miss Jenowitz

from the Chemistry Department,

Nice to see you.

and Miss Lovell

from Administration.

And of course

you know my wife Sheila.

I almost didn't recognize you.

I thought you'd brought

a professional model.

You look lovely.

Oh, Philip!

- Yeah, the b*tch is fine, isn't she?

- What?

Dear, can you at least

feign some interest?

You're embarrassing me.

And will you loosen up?

You're so stiff sometimes.

Stiff?

Bart, this party is stiff.

Excuse me, can you hold this?

I'm hot.

Can you put this

back on, actually?

Your butt is sticking out.

- What?

- What a jerk!

Don't spoil your appetite, Dean.

We're about to have

some lobster bisque...

and Indian pudding

that doesn't stop.

I got the munchies

like a motherf***er.

Hold this, baby.

He seems unusual tonight.

He's dehydrated.

Dance!

Yo, baby,

this is boring as hell.

Yo, yo, yo, yo, deejay !

Hit me!

Come here, girl!

Yeah, yeah, yeah

You two stay put.

I'm gonna hurt you!

Hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey.

Yo, J. Yo, T.

See those two

fine ass ho's right there?

Don't you wish

they were really ho's...

and they came over here

and said,

We want to run a dick-sucking

marathon with y'all two?

Oh, yeah. I'd like that.

Me too!

Mm, okay.

You and you.

We wanna run

a dick-suckin' marathon

with y'all.

Okay. I'm not

that good at it.

Oh, baby, I ain't laughin'.

I'm gonna make you mine.

- Smells good.

- Ooh, you pretty boy-lookin'

motherf***er.

Hey, don't be scared.

It's only p*ssy.

Oh!

Don't be scared.

I got two inches of hard dick!

I'll work with you, baby.

Come on.

"Costume party.

Place:
Lovell House,

Time:
Friday. "

It is Friday.

But that's what

she told Cocoa Butter.

These b*tches

better be gettin' my money.

Hella Back is my bottom b*tch.

You know that, right?

Right. Powder.

B*tch better be out here

checkin' my motherfuckin' money.

Don't cuss when I'm tryin'

to listen to the Word.

The Lord don't like that.

- What did I say?

- You said b*tch,

and b*tch ain't in the Bible.

I know, b*tch,

and neither is motherf***er.

So drive this motherfuckin' car.

And you an assistant pimp.

You ain't even a real pimp.

So you supposed to be cosigning

to the sh*t that I say.

You wanna lose your job,

I will pull your motherfuckin'

application.

Now let's practice it.

Where's my b*tches?

Where's my b*tches?

Where's my b*tches?

Where's my b*tches?

You gotta say it together.

It goes in together.

Where's my b*tches?

Okay, check this out.

Where my b*tches?

Can't we just

say employees?

What about your employees?

No, f*** that!

Oh, yeah! Great ass!

# Box up just like bein'

in your chest, thinks she got

away, don't hold your breath #

# Spinnin' on a track

with Red and Meth #

# Open up a fat one and smoke up

the sess, see these, we

the ones with the Wheaties #

# Treadin' on them all

Come on, believe me, look who

it is with the hockey feel #

# Look, an assassin

from Cypress Hill

DJ just resonated #

Go! Go! Go! Go!

Go! Go! Go! Go!

Oh, Silas, hi.

Hey, hey.

Um, let me ask you a question.

Now don't laugh. But, um--

Does my ass look fat?

No.

Put another one

on the front just like it,

I'll slap both

them motherfuckers.

Badow! Badow!

Here. Peer pressure,

peer pressure, peer pressure.

Come on.

Let me holler at you.

Okay.

All right.

Oh, that's my song!

What's this?

Ooh, you got a big sword, baby!

I-I have to go prepare.

Oh, you ain't got to

do sh*t, baby,

except climb out of this costume

and climb into some p*ssy, baby.

You have to appreciate

the colorful use

of English language.

- Oh, yeah!

- Wait, give me

that Chinese egg roll f***!

I love America!

# And sing along

to my hip-hop song, had you

chokin' off of a bong #

# Cypress Hill and we can't

go wrong, people smokin

like Cheech and Chong #

Let it be something

he is involved in, and I better

be the biggest cheerleader.

He is a huge baby.

Yeah, I hear you

with your fine ass.

But pass the blunt, boo.

Damn, you hoggin'

the whole sh*t!

I'm sorry.

Whoa, I must be buzzed.

I'm babbling.

You know, you surprised me

by getting high.

You know, you surprised me

by getting high.

I'm not that much

of a square, Silas.

I did do it once in high school.

Whatever.

What about you?

We all have secrets.

Well, if you act right,

I might just let you

in my head one day.

Whatever.

But I ain't sayin' sh*t

on the first date.

Who said this was a date?

You smoked my weed, didn't you?

And we almost kissed, didn't we?

We did not.

Yes, we did.

We did not.

Here, hit this.

Oh, my bad.

Did I spoil the moment?

I can't help it, girl.

You know what?

Them shits

was talkin' to me.

You know what?

Oh, my God, look at them.

Turn the headlights off.

Stop it!

I'm gonna tell you something.

This pimpin' that I got

came from a family tree.

My granddaddy was a pimp.

My great-great-great-granddaddy

was a pimp.

I'm talkin' about

pimpin' been since pimpin'...

since been pimpin'

since been pimpin'.

It's in your bloodline.

It's in my blood,

and you will never be that.

- W-W-W-Why?

- Because, you was born,

all the people in your family

were assistant pimps.

You's a pimp.

I never deny you that.

I thought you was the one

the Lord chose.

If it had not been for the Lord,

I would not have had

not a b*tch come into my life.

Goddamn, not a--

Not a hell, not a b*tch.

Nobody say that now nothin'

like you say that now nothin'.

Not a now, not a b*tch.

I still don't know

what that sh*t mean,

but it sound good!

Now nothin' mean

don't get a now nothin'.

Now nothin'.

A now nothin' nothin' now.

-

- B*tch, shut up

and drive this f***in' car.

# Y'all gonna make me

lose my mind #

# Up in here, up in here #

# Y'all gonna make me

go all out #

# Up in here, up in here #

# Y'all gonna make me

act the fool #

# Up in here, up in here #

#Y'all gonna make me

Rate this script:2.0 / 1 vote

Dustin Lee Abraham

Dustin Lee Abraham is an American actor, producer and screenwriter. He penned the 2001 cult movie How High for Method Man and Redman. As of 2009, he produces and writes for CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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