How To Rob A Bank Page #5

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really "Jinx" either.

It isn't?

No. It is. It is my name.

Hey that's okay.

Perfectly valid.

Anyway, what can I do for you, Nick?

Jinx, we have a bit

of a situation here.

And I think it's down to you

and me to figure this thing out.

You and me? Okay.

I'm going to put the cards

on the table.

You have something I need.

Information.

Information my associates are

no longer in a position to offer.

I propose we adapt, evolve,

grow some balls.

Walk ourselves out of this quagmire.

I'll cut to the chase. What do you want?

My twenty bucks.

I'm sorry.

Did you say twenty bucks?

I don't want to be rude...

but I think you might want

to revise that number.

You think? Like what?

Like look around you.

I'd add a few zeroes to that

twenty-dollar figure of yours.

And I just walk out with everything.

You don't want any

piece of this money?

All I need is for you to walk

over to the computer terminal...

and generate a PIN number

for me. Easy as pie.

Same arrangement

I had with them.

"If it ain't broke

don't fix it,"right?

"If it ain't broke..."

Right. Yeah.

So, I walk.

And you have no problem selling

out Simon and Jessica.

And whoever else just

for a little info?

This must be a pretty

valuable PIN number.

Things change.

We adapt, right?

- Bullshit.

- What?

I said bullshit.

You had no intention of letting these

guys out of here! Did you, Nick?

What are you talking about?

"If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

Right?

In fact, that reminds me

of something a friend once said.

"Breaking" into a bank

is what screws you...

because "breaking in" takes time

and time is what gets you caught.

So how do you rob a bank

without "breaking in?"

Unlock everything at once?

Fast and efficient?

Use this computer, a few codes,

then grab and go?

I don't think so. If you knew

enough to get these codes...

and what to do with...

then you knew this vault door would

seal up as soon as an alarm was tripped.

You're trapped.

So, while the codes seem like a good

idea, they're nothing more than bait...

just means to some other end for you.

In other words,

the codes are bullshit.

It's really about

that innocent little PIN...

which I'm betting is worth

a lot more than anything else in here.

But the only way to get

that PIN is in this vault.

I don't know, just a working theory.

All right there, Columbo...

you seem to be answering a lot of unasked

questions for an "innocent"bystander.

What the hell are you getting at?

Hey, it's not for nothing...

but I didn't ask to be locked

in this frickin' vault!

All I ever wanted was

my twenty bucks but no!

Some greedy bastard

decided it was a great idea...

to increase his

bank's profit margin...

fire tellers to

lower corporate costs...

close branches, install

endless ATM machines...

surcharging my ass

to kingdom-come...

until I can't afford

my own twenty bucks.

What the hell does that have

to do with anything?

I'm glad you asked.

"Insufficient Funds"

means I had to walk...

my ass into the only Union Federal

I could find to withdraw my money...

but it was already having a large

withdrawal made, i.e. being robbed...

which was perfectly fine by me...

until some jack-ass pointed

a gun at me.

This guy gets all jumpy,

tries to blow my head off...

his gun jams and I run

for cover in this vault...

which proceeds to lock behind me

locking me in this vault...

where I literally run into some super

hot chick whom I'm trapped with...

which sounds great except she

proceeded to punch me in the face...

ruining my otherwise

wonderfully boring day...

and wasting my pedantically

precious time.

Bummer.

So screw it, screw service

fees and screw you!

You and all the corporate

"convenience" criminals...

are equally f***ed

in your high- tech heists.

You can't keep screwing

guys like me...

and then add a surcharge for it.

I'm taking charge of the surcharge.

In short, blow me. I want answers.

You are having a bad day.

Please, go on.

The real question is, how do you get in

this vault without getting trapped in it?

My guess is, you don't do it at all.

You don't care...

if your anonymously

hired guns get trapped...

as long as they are in the vault.

Because as long as

you had someone in the vault...

you had what you wanted, almost.

- So, f*** you, I'm hanging up.

- No. F*** you!

You're not hanging up.

You know why?

Because you don't have your

four precious little numbers.

- What the?

- Jessica. Name's Jessica.

I'm one of the ones you

set up to screw.

- Yeah. It almost hurts, doesn't it?

- What?

I'm glad you asked,

it's called "Exploding Noema."

It's a theory about the moment...

you can't reconcile

the difference...

between your perception

of what should be...

versus the reality of what is

I find, completely screwing someone

with a classic double-cross...

only to find they're

now your only hope...

will pretty much

explode your noema.

But, I'm betting that

moment's past now and...

I'm betting you're more

in the dealing mood.

You want your precious PIN?

There's gonna be a surcharge.

- So, what's it going to be Nick?

- Okay.

Jessica, are you okay?

I'm fine.

I think someone cut

the power in here.

You think?

Who cut the power then,

and why, what's going on...

you know, that sort of thing?

I don't really know,

but it's not good.

Nick, we're gonna have

to call you back.

We have to fix this. I don't have

a handle on this whole thing...

but it's pretty apparent that

our fate and any possible fortune...

is in that computer.

Nobody panic, okay?

Let me make a phone call.

- Oh, hey there.

- Hello?

Hey, what happened?

I don't know, I've been on hold

this whole time with you.

Are you trying to keep me waiting?

I have to admit...

nice negotiation tactic...

you had me going there for a while.

No. I just forgot about you.

How did you forget about me?

I was... busy, that's all.

Busy? You're locked in a vault.

What the f*** could you be doing

to keep you busy?

You worry me now, Jinx.

Oh, I'm sorry

really. Please, don't worry.

Officer DeGepse was just

talking me through this crisis.

It's been very stressful for me.

I didn't let him know anything really.

I figured you'd want me

to keep him waiting while you...

And I make some sort of a deal.

Okay. Okay.

Good thinking Jinxy.

That was good.

All right, it's you and me.

About that deal...

Well, first, what happened?

It's frickin' dark in here.

I think they cut the power.

Don't sweat it. They just do this

to be intimidating.

First order of business

is that we reach an agreement.

Then we'll negotiate with the cops...

free some hostages in exchange

for putting the power back on...

Hold on. Hold on.

Hold on I think my batt...

F***!

F***! F***!

F***! F***! F***!

F***! F***!

Think he's trying

to communicate with us?

Hello?

Officer DeGepse here.

How are you two holding up?

Oh, hey there. Yeah, we're okay.

Any change of status in there?

It's pretty dark in here.

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