I Declare War Page #4

Please...

Please, let me go.

No.

You f***ed up my life,

so you're going to pay for it.

I... I've... never even... talked...

Then you and P.K. did.

What did we do?

Before, I was normal.

I... I wasn't cool,

but I wasn't a loser.

Now, I am a loser.

I'm a joke,

and my life is basically over.

I'm gonna be a loser in high school,

a loser in university,

and a loser for the rest of my life.

Even the retards

are more popular than me.

I might as well be a retard.

Or have a big scar on my face.

Can you imagine how terrible

it would be to have a big scar

right in the middle of your face?

Or blind.

Or your tongue cut out?

That would suck, eh?

Please let me go.

I'm... I'm sorry for...

for whatever we did.

Not yet.

Not until you feel the same way I do.

Then you'll be sorry.

- Gotcha!

- Did not!

Did too!

Hey, Sikorski! You hear me?

How about your girlfriend, Frost?

You tell Quinn I'm comin' for him!

You take my best friend prisoner,

and you're asking for trouble.

That's not how you win a war!

Yeah? Well, there's

no rule against it.

Tell him that's not his style!

He's better than that!

Well, maybe Quinn's

not our general anymore!

Yeah? So, who is?

- You, Frost?

- No, it's Quinn. It's Quinn.

Really? Cause it sounds

like someone over there

is a big, fat liar!

Time out, P.K.!

Quinn had to go home.

We'll tell you what happened,

but you have to give us two minutes.

Okay! Two minutes. That's it!

Okay, come on out!

Okay. I'm coming out now...

Ha!

Oh, man, that was sweet!

Did you see?

Nice one, Frost!

No!

P.K.! give me cover!

Aah!

Out! Get out, get out! One...

Come on! Move, now!

- Nine steamboats...

- Get up!

Four...

Frost!

Let him go, or you'll regret it.

Bullshit. Take him, Frost.

Ten.

Last chance.

Let him go, or he's gonna get it.

He's bluffing. He's got nothing.

- Do so.

- Do not.

- Do so.

- Do not!

Do... so.

Run!

He loves me.

He loves me not.

He loves me.

Oof!

Aah!

So, I heard you and your bum-buddy

kicked Kenney's face in.

- Is that true?

- No, I swear.

Skinner told us to.

Kenney told me you stomped on him,

and he asked me to stomp back,

so we're gonna.

Ready to get your nose broken, b*tch?

Then you go cry to Sikorski

and tell him he's next.

No!

Altar boy, get in here

and help me hold him.

Altar boy, ge...

Aah! Oh!

- Ha!

- Aah!

Barn! Barn!

- One...

- Sikorski!

I need a grenade!

Are you there?

Sikorski!

- Five...

- Sikorski!

I need grenades!

- Seven...

- Ugh!

Eight... nine...

B*tch.

And you! What the f*** was that?

I'm sorry. I was scared.

You were scared?

It was two against one.

You were scared

he'd beat us both up?

God, you little chicken-sh*t geek.

I'm sorry.

Joker?

Ow!

You still here?

Good.

H... hey.

You say something?

Is that story about you and Jenny...

...and Karen true?

No.

What story?

The one where they invited

you over to go swimming.

Who told you that?

Three different people.

Well, they're lying.

I heard that after school one day...

Karen invited you over to go swimming

at 888 Spence Street.

Spence only goes up to 880, right?

How long did you spend

even looking for 882?

An hour?

Did you ring any doorbells

to ask where...

...888 was?

That's how you must

have found out, right?

Some neighbor must have told you.

Then they were like, "Looks like

somebody played a trick on you, kid."

Right?

Shut up!

Ow! Oww!

God!

Don't.

Aah! Ah!

F***!

Sikorski.

Smoke?

Yeah.

Where's Frost?

There was a battle. With wasps.

He ran away.

You got a light?

No.

Where you going?

Back to base.

Mind if I walk with you?

Whatever.

I just love smoking. Don't you?

I don't know. I guess.

Can you do me a favor?

I don't know.

Could you grab me that leaf up there?

Why?

I just think it's beautiful.

Don't you?

It's a leaf.

Don't you ever appreciate something

just because it's beautiful?

Please?

For me.

Thank you. I love it.

I'll keep it forever.

Okay.

So, tell me about yourself.

- What's your first name?

- Trevor.

Trevor. That's a nice name.

Hey, Trevor, could you

do me another small favor?

I don't know.

Could you carry my crossbow?

And you just didn't give a crap

that we would get stung too?

- I had no choice.

- Yeah, right!

We won the battle.

End of story.

And now we know for sure

that Quinn is gone.

If Quinn's gone, why are we

still playing anymore?

Because a coup doesn't end a war.

But when an incompetent

general commits the coup,

it makes it easier to win.

Skinner's a spaz.

We'll just run a classic offensive

on him, and it'll be over.

Right.

Look, he can't move

if he's holding Paul.

He can't defend on all sides.

Maybe... you get taken out. Or you.

But someone will

punch through and get his flag.

We win.

But one of us gets killed?

This is war, man,

not f***ing hopscotch!

You want to win?

You gotta have casualties.

Whatever, P.K., but Frost is mine.

It seems easy.

Because it is easy.

As long as Paul stays prisoner,

the balance of power is in our favor.

The secret to success

lies in simple maneuvers.

Napoleon said that.

Yeah? Didn't Napoleon

ever lose a war?

No.

Hey! P.K.!

P.K.!

Oh, my God, you're

not going to believe this.

Skinner is mental.

He killed Quinn, and then

he put this board on me.

Aw, man, that thing with Kevin

was awesome, though!

When he came into the base

and started telling everyone what to do,

that was one of your best ever!

Skinner was berserk, though.

He wouldn't fall for it.

And then he starts torturing me!

But then I burned him

and got out, so it's okay.

Hey, I saw Kevin take

a couple rocks to the head.

Is he all right?

What?

I have some bad news.

What is it?

I need you to go back.

Go back where?

To Skinner.

Yeah, right.

Look, I've got it all worked out.

In fact, now that you're here to tell us

where his base is,

it's even more perfect.

He won't leave as long as

you're at his base.

I'll run a ring offensive

on him and it'll be over.

Did you hear what I said?

He tortured me.

He was gonna cut me.

It'll all be over before he even

gets the chance to touch you.

No. No way.

Come on.

Fits the plan perfectly.

Make a new plan!

L-I can't. I'm sorry.

I'm scared.

Okay.

We'll start from scratch.

This is bullshit!

It's too hot to be out here all day.

Why don't you go back there?

Really would be faster.

Say hi to Frost for me.

P.K.'s got a really good plan.

It won't work.

It's not going to work.

Oh, awesome. Thanks.

Can you be there in 15 minutes?

Yeah.

Uh, wait, Paul.

Where's his base?

The dead woods.

Great. Thanks.

Fifteen minutes.

Where have you been?

We...

there was a battle.

- Where's Paul?

- He escaped.

- How did he...

- He escaped, all right? He escaped!

Where's Frost?

I'm here.

- Where's Paul?

- He's gone.

He's gone, and now

there's no hope of winning!

None!

So, are you going to give us

orders there, general, or what?

I need to get Paul back.

Go find Paul.

Okay. We'll go together.

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