Idle Hands Page #4

Well, you must have

the wrong number.

No, it's 8-4-6-8.

That's good.

I think you've been a bad girl...

...and I want to spank you

with my ruler.

Oh, yes, that's nice.

That is nice.

Now I'm hot.

I'm hot.

You got me so hot, it's like

I can feel you touching me.

I can feel you touching me.

Bingo!

Come on! We got to find Anton!

And kick his ass!

Are you Anton?

If you're a teacher,

we'll discuss my attendance later...

I found you!

My name is Debi LeCure.

I know what's happening.

I could stop it.

Really, how?

Die!

Yeah, f*** him up, Debi!

The host of evil must die!

Isn't that knife

a little extreme, kitten?

You're not going anywhere, evil-hosting

f***-stick. Nobody touches my Ford!

Come on, Debi.

Give him what for.

Wait, wait! I'm not a host.

Okay, look.

The evil was in my hand, all right?

I cut it off. Okay?

Oh, sh*t!

You let it loose?

That was probably a mistake.

No kidding. And now it's

after my girlfriend.

- You got a girlfriend?

- I gotta stop it.

- It's out for blood.

- That ain't all it's out for.

If your girl's the one it's after,

then at midnight...

...it's taking her to hell.

Hell?

It's not even 9:
00 yet.

We got some time.

It's actually...

...six minutes till midnight,

druid time.

Druid time.

Right.

Let's go!

Oh, God!

That's disgusting.

Come on, man. You're dead.

You know, think about it.

It's illegal.

Move! Look out!

Everybody, go home!

There's a psycho killer here!

I cut off my hand,

and it'll kill you all.

Get off the stage!

It's true.

His hand killed us yesterday.

Yeah, it sliced me up real good.

- Molly, you out there?

- Get out of here, kid!

You had your fun!

Now it's time...

Sh*t!

- God! Did you see that thing?

- I have to get Anton!

No, screw him!

I mean, he'll be fine!

Come on!

In there?

You want to stay out here and

get killed as you're trampled?

I was going to get some.

I really doubt it.

Pnub's a lot more creative

than I thought.

I mean, he's actually kind of cool.

- He had that costume...

- Maybe we should go faster.

I don't know if he did it or...

- Wait, wait!

- What, what...?

Go!

Oh, sh*t! We're trapped in here!

- It's going to get me!

- It's not going to get you!

It's not going to get you!

We can't go through the blade!

We'll be pulverized!

Give me your shoe!

What are you going to do?

No, no.

Oh, God, it's too far!

I can't drop that far!

We'll die in this vent!

- We won't die.

- We'll die here.

The rats are gonna eat us,

and nobody's gonna find us.

Okay, we're good.

- Be careful.

- All right, let's go!

This would be more comfortable

if your ass wasn't so wide.

- This is dumb.

- Anton needs our help.

The best thing about being dead

is zero responsibility.

That's Tanya. Let's save her.

Come on!

- Hurry up. She needs me.

- She needs you like a fish needs...

Okay, this sucks.

Grab the cord and come down!

I can't. I can't. I'm scared!

Do it, Tanya! Come on!

I can't. It's here.

It's in here. I know it.

Why'd you pull the rope up?

I didn't pull the rope up.

Tanya, where are you?

I can't see you!

Tanya, talk to me, please!

Just jump! Just jump!

Tanya, grab the rope!

Get it off!

I'm not going through all this Tanya.

Go back that way.

- Now you really won't get any.

- It's unfair.

You can go back if you want

to get a piece.

F***ing hand, I got you now!

Who's your daddy now, b*tch?

Who's your f***ing...

We're here for you.

Don't worry.

- I made that ashtray!

- Really?

You let it go again!

F*** you, then.

Fine, then! You know what?

You aren't crashing at my house.

Did you guys hear that?

Help! Help!

Help me!

Bet she wins Best Costume.

Help me!

The hand's raising the car!

Help me!

Don't worry. We got it under control!

The f***er's got a grip.

Hurry, please!

Those auto-shop boys

are true artistes.

It's Mighty Joe Bong!

I needs me spinach.

I made that.

The ashtray, I'd almost believe.

But this? No way.

Molly's about to get squished,

you bastards!

This is important. For strength.

There you go.

Now you're taking Anton-time.

You're getting stoned with

your friends? Unbelievable!

That's some one-hit sh*t there!

Don't worry.

I'll get you down.

That's it?

That's it?

No explosions, no hellfire, no...?

I'm glad everyone's all right.

But that was weak.

Well, my work here is done.

Time for the ritualistic sex.

You coming?

You are a pistol.

Hello? I'm still up here.

Thanks, Mick.

You're a bud.

Come here.

As usual...

...marijuana saves

an otherwise disastrous day.

I never got a hit. Light me.

Sweet Jesus!

That wasn't my fault!

That thing should've come down

a lot slower!

What the hell.

Don't forget my bong.

You did not make that bong.

I arc welded it.

You don't take auto shop.

F*** you!

You coming, Anton?

I can't even believe it.

You blew off heaven

to kick it with me.

You are the coolest.

You taking care of me

beats the sh*t out of heaven.

Really?

Time for your meds.

Guys! You blew off heaven too?

No, we're your guardian angels.

Poor thing has delirium.

Visiting hours are over.

I'll see you tomorrow, okay?

So the deal is,

we're supposed to monitor you...

...and make sure you don't revert

to your evil ways.

But you seem fine now.

Let's hit the Snack Master in the hall.

You want anything?

Get me Crunch Nuggets.

They're awesome.

Thanks, you guys.

Hit the light.

Mick! Pnub!

Come guardian me!

You're right.

Anton screams like a girl.

Think we should tell him

we painted that?

F*** it.

Let's go walk through a nurse.

Watch it! Some of them are guys.

GELULA & CO., INC.

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