Igor Page #2
the respect he gets!
Respect? Respect
isn't gonna keep me
in baby-seal boots.
(SEAL WHIMPERING)
You just need to
keep on winning
Well, that is spoken
like a true worthless
leech,
who, by the way still has
not helped me steal this
year's winning invention.
You know,
maybe if you were
a real scientist,
you wouldn't need
me to help you
cheat every year.
(MACHINERY WHINING)
(SNICKERS)
Your whole
lab is fake,
just like you.
And maybe I should
throw you back in the
You're one to talk,
Dr. Schadenfraude!
You don't have
the guts.
(GASPS)
(GROANING)
(EXCLAIMS)
(GASPS)
(LAUGHING)
Is Daddy still
mad at me?
No.
But you and
your friend
Heidi
still have a litt e
job to do.
Oh, we're trying.
Well, try a little
bit harder!
Because this year,
I won't stop at
just winning the
Evil Science Fair.
(JACLYN LAUGHING)
I'm gonna unleash
my winnlng invention
on the King's
smug little face,
and then he'll be
the one groveling
at my feet!
(YODELING)
Hi there!
Look, it's your
little girlfriend,
Heidi.
You take a cocoa break,
and I'll guard
your plans for
your new invention.
No, wait! You'll
spill on my plans.
Heidi, you re not
careful enough!
You're so sloppy
sometimes.
Oh, poopshkin.
I went to the evil
bookstore and got you
an inspirational poster.
It's a little kitten!
To remind you to always
take time in your day
for a little torture
My transducer!
Time to go
I have no time for
cocoa or kittens!
I have to work on
my plans alone
and in secret.
(EXCLAIMING)
In otherwords,
bon voyage.
Who doesn't like
tortured kittens?
I...
I like kittens.
I don't like dirty
little hunchpeople.
Great, Schadenfreude's
gonna kill me.
(SIGHS)
And why are there
two transducers?
Master, the 21- gigawatt
might be somewhat safer,
I think.
Think? Igors
don't think.
I m using the
you fool!
Now get over there
and pull the switch!
What are you
waiting for?
Yes, Master!
Yes! Yes!
Yes!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
I told you the
you Igor
Behold my rocket ship
(CACKLES)
Born to stream
through the world,
un eashing pain and
misery on everyone.
I named her after
you, Mother.
(CACKLING)
(ALARM BLARING)
Now to take the old
cow for a test drive.
No, Master!
The rocket
is going to...
(GLASS SHATTERING)
Uh... Yeah that.
SCAMPER:
Finally.Now I can throw out
that rug in the foyer
That thing is hideous.
We were all thinking
it. I just said it.
(BANGING ON DOOR)
Oh, no, who's that?
What am I gonna do?
Relax, this is
Glickenstein's
castle.
And he doesn't have
to open that door
for anyone.
ROYAL GUARD:
Open for the King!
Except for the King.
Oh, my God
Oh, my God
He's here to
see Glickenstein!
What do I tell him?
Tell him the truth.
And if he kills us,
I'll come back
and give you a
beautiful funeral.
Right, right. The truth,
that's a good option.
Right, right.
Glicky!
Glicky, my boy
Where's Glicky?
Your Highness,
he's gone.
Curse it I need to
see his invention.
Schadenfreude is
getting too popular.
The people might
make him king.
Someone has
to beat him
this year,
with an invention
more evil than his.
Someone who can snatch
Schadenfreude's number
one position
and rub his face
In number two!
BOTH:
Ew!Your Highness,
Dr. Glickenstein is
creating life!
Did you say "life"?
Yes.
Think ng, breathing
life that can destroy
freely all on its own.
No Evil Scientist
has ever been able
to create life!
(WHIMPERING)
Oh, sure they've
mutated life.
They've ended life.
They've blasted ife
into a million gooey
pieces.
But created life?
A weapon like that would
be the greatest Evil
Invention of all time.
And its inventor
the greatest Evil
Scientist of all time?
Of course!
This is what I've
been waiting for.
And it's your job
to make sure nothing
happens to Glickenstein,
or I'll throw
you down the
recycling chute
and use your hunch
as a speed bump!
(GULPS)
Oh, this is big.
Schadenfreude'is
winning streak is over.
Come on boys!
Let's go kick
some old people.
(LAUGHS)
Ow! What is wrong
with you?
That's for having
a death wish.
That's my thing.
I am not gonna
die, Scamper.
For the first time ever,
I'm gonna live!
(SCREAMS)
I sometimes come
down here to think.
Wow, how interesting.
What' s next?
You're gonna
pull out a guitar
and play us a song you
wrote in college about
being misunderstood?
(BOTH SCREAMING)
I know, right?
And she's not
even done yet.
(SCREAMING)
(JUMP, JIVE 'N' WAIL PLAYING)
Baby, baby, It looks
like it's gonna hail
Baby, baby, It looks
like it's gonna hail
You better come inside
Let me teech you
how to jive and wail
(BRAIN SCREAMING)
Come on, bigger.
Do it. Come on,
make it bigger.
Bigger!
(SCREAMS)
Okay to the left.
Very good. Now
back to the right.
No, no, no!
To the left, now back
to the right. To the
right. To the right.
Is that even
herhand?
(GROANS)
(EXCLAIMS)
And now to
make her skin
indestructible.
You gotta jump, jive,
and then you wail
You gotta jump, jive,
and then you wail
You gotta jump, jive,
and then you wail
(SCREAMS)
(LAUGHING)
Did you see that?
Shoot him again.
And now,
the crucial
last piece,
the source of all
the Monster's power,
the Evil Bone.
I have to hurry.
It loses its power
in the light.
That's it.
Only one thing
left to do.
(CHUCKLES)
He said "do."
Pull the switch!
(ECHOING)
Do not yell at me.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I was just...
Pull the switch.
Please pull the switch.
That's better.
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
Why does he get to
pull the switch?
(SIGHS)
Because I'm not
an idiot, Brian.
My name is not Brian!
Then you must
have his jar.
Stop! You can both
pull the switch.
On the count
of three. One.
Hey! No fair!
You said we could
both pull the...
(SCREAMS)
(SHUDDERING)
Rise!
Rise!
(ALARM BLARING)
(POWERING DOWN)
I...
I don't believe it.
I'm a failure.
I'm a...
I'm an Igor.
Get rid of
that thing.
I never want to
see it again.
Funny you should
say that.
Uh... Igor? Yeah.
Where did the
monster go?
I don't know, Brain.
May I suggest
looking behind
you?
(SCREAMS)
It was just a suggestion.
(BRAIN SQUEAKING)
Maybe it just
spontaneously
combusted?
Oh, yeah sure.
I've read about
that in...
Who am I kidding?
I can't read!
(CLANGING)
(METALLIC CREAKING)
(ALL GASP)
(SHUDDERS)
(EXCLAIMS IN ALARM)
(ROARING)
And just like that
she was out of
their lives.
I did it. I...
I created life.
Has that
hole alwayss
been there?
Come on!
SCAMPER:
Let meget this straight
We are chasing after
the bloodthirsty
monster?
"Home For
Blind Orphans."
(SCREAMING)
Oh God,
she's killing
blind orphans!
That's so evil!
I mean, which
is great, but...
(SCREAMING CONTINUES)
Blind orphans!
(KIDS LAUGHING)
(SQUEALING)
I wanna go next
(WHOOPING)
Me, me, pick me!
I wonder what
diabolical deed
she has planned next.
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"Igor" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/igor_10627>.
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