Ill Manors Page #8

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Oi! What the f***!

What the f***in' hell are you up to?

- What you talkin' about, you mug?

- Who are you calling a mug?

- Are You pluggin' drugs in my pub?

- Drugs?

Come on! Don't take me for

a f***in' idiot!

I had one in here the other night

tellin' me he's not servin' up in my pub!

What am I, some prize f***in' idiot?

I ain't havin' it, pal. It ain't on.

What the f*** are you talkin' about?

Aaron and that other idiot, Ed.

Think I don't know what they're up to?

It ain't on, pal!

Cool, bro.

Get the f*** out of my way!

What? What did you say about my mum?

What did you say about my mum, bruv?

Now come... Come here and say...

(Tuts)

What you say about my mum, bruv?

F***ing come here and say that, bruv!

(Gunshot)

(Train stops)

(Doors beep)

What the f***! Oi!

Give me your number!

Oi! Give me your...

Give me your number!

I'll bell you at the next station, yeah?

What the f***! Oi!

Oi!

Oi! It's your f***ing baby!

Give me your number!

(Plan B) This story's dark

Like the place where this story starts

Full of fiends and gangsters

With gory hearts

Drugged-up girls

Dressed up like naughty tarts

Performing sex

And perverted forms of art

On anybody with a fantasy

That needs fulfilling

Even the filth, cops that lock up man

For stealin' frequent there

Bent sweat drippin' off the ceiling

Sadomasochists that need

To quench their thirst for beatings

Anything goes when you've got the

riches but only the sexually depraved

Pay for pregnant b*tches

Her name's Katya

Yours to do what you wish with

If you're into chicks that wake up

With morning sickness

And have to make their way

Past people f***in'

Punters hooked on hookers

Hooked on smack cluckin'

Spent her days getting touched up

And f***ed, f***in'

Wishing she could wake up

From the nightmare she was stuck in

But she weren't wakin' up from nothin'

This was her reality

A place where dreams come true

For those who lack morality

She had to get out

Not for her child, for her sanity

Cos the only difference

Between this place and hell was gravity

Yeah

It was a weird twist of fate

The way that she escaped

She knew her chance would come

She just had to wait

Till one of her abductors

Made a mistake

Mixing vodka with heart pills

And smoking a straight

With the door unlocked

Ain't the smartest idea

When your runnings are illegal

And your cargo live in fear

Her path was now clear

But only for her exit

Cos although ahead was long

And full of unexpected twists and turns

She learned inadvertently how to cope

With life's little moments of uncertainty

Feelin' safe on the street

However absurd it seems

The mother and baby unit

Where she had disturbing dreams

Was the place she didn't feel was safe

And had to leave

It would only be a matter of time before

she had police asking her questions

J' Finding out the truth

About her underworld connections

Sending her back to the brothel

Either that or simply just deporting her

She's met corrupted law before

She can't see them supporting her

So she goes along a road

That slowly starts destroying her

Not knowing where she's going

Or why God just keeps ignoring her

(Baby cries)

(Spits)

How much?

F***in' 50?

(scoffs)

F***in' brassin' with a baby?

Here you are. 40 notes.

Why don't you buy the little f***er

a dummy or something? Shut it up!

F***in' disgusting!

Who the f*** are you?

You're one of them illegal immigrants,

ain't ya?

(Baby coos)

(Sighs)

(Baby cries)

(sobs)

It's OK. Oh!

Come here. It's OK.

(Baby stops crying)

Yeah. It's OK.

(Grunts)

What's the baby's name?

No name.

Poor kid. She ain't got a hope in hell.

(Sighs)

(Baby cries)

What the f*** are you doin'?

Oh, God!

Were my eyes open?

Are you going somewhere?

Paddington.

I'll take ya.

(Beatboxes)

I've got the tickets, all right?

Look, I just need you to wait here

for two minutes. I'll be right back, OK?

(Sighs)

It's her!

(Doors beep)

I'm still waiting for the sign

And you're the only one...

(Coughs)

What the f***! Oi!

(Bangs on the door)

Give me your number!

Still I sing the same old song

I'm still waiting for the sun

(indistinct chatting)

Oi!

Stop!

Oi, mister! Follow that car!

- I can't, love.

- I'll sort you out!

Just wait here!

What the f***!

F***ing madness!

Oh...

(indistinct chatting)

Oh, f***!

F***ing baby!

- You got a ticket there, mate? Ticket?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No problem, mate.

(Shouting and sobbing)

(Screaming)

Get those f***ing b*tches out of here!

Come here, you f***ing...

(Groans)

You're f***ing history!

(Grunts)

Quickly! Go! Go, go!

Hurry! Quickly! Faster!

Come on!

Go!

Ed!

What the f*** is that?

- It's a baby, innit?

- What, you stole someone's baby?

Bruv, some woman left it on a train.

And you're bringin' it here to me?

Look, bruv, it's more complicated

than that, yeah?

Where the f*** did you get that? Hm?

- Well, I found it, innit?

- Where?

I just found it.

Just like that, yeah?

So why you bringin' it to me then?

I'm on the f***in' train with the piece.

I got the reload on me, like.

About 20 feds with sniffer dogs

pop out of nowhere.

I f***in' had to dash it somewhere.

I hid it in the pram with the baby, innit?

- What, you hid it with the baby?

- Yeah, innit?

That's the smartest thing you've done

in your d*ckhead life! What now?

What you gonna do with this?

Give it to the feds?

- I can't give it to the feds.

- Why not?

I popped past the feds with it once.

Am I gonna go back

like I f***in' changed my mind?

I'll look like a paedo.

Well, call social services then.

What? Hm?

Nah, if we do that,

they're gonna put it in a home, innit?

- So what?

- Nah, that's not the one, bruv.

- We grew up in homes, man.

- Exactly.

Exactly what, bruv?

Some woman's just abandoned

her yoot on a train!

And she obviously don't want it, man.

Bruv... what the f*** is that smell?

Hm? What the f*** is that smell, bruv?

It's disgusting, man!

I'll have to change

its f***in' nappies now!

(Sighs)

Give me the gun while you do that.

Let me look after it for you, innit?

Is it? You gonna help me find its mum?

Nah. I've got better things to do

with my time than run around like that.

But you carryin' that, bruv...

Just give me the gun

and I'll hide it somewhere for you, innit?

Nah, it's all right. I'm gonna hold it.

You don't want no help?

You're a prick, bruv.

Come. Give me the tings.

H S 7 h O...

- Don't tell me you put it in there!

- I had to hide it somewhere!

What you puttin' it in there for, man?

Take it then!

You'd better clean that.

(Laughs)

You're a prick, bruv.

When you're done f***in' about, yeah...

Nah, when you're done f***in' about, yeah,

you call me, yeah?

Cos we've got f***in' things to do,

you prick, yeah?

- All right!

- F***in' daddy boy!

- D*ckhead!

- F*** off, man!

(Laughs)

Oh, for...

You take the piss. You know that? Oh!

You laughin' at?

Oh, man! Allow it.

- I'm not even on it.

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