In the Loop Page #10

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Polite laughter. Toby comes in.

TOBY:

Hi I’m sorry I’m so late.

KAREN:

(re Toby)

And this is your guy?

SIMON:

Yes. He’s, you know, among my guys.

Toby shoots Simon a look.

KAREN:

(turning to Toby)

I’m Karen. And I believe you already

know Liza.

TOBY:

(she can’t know?)

Yes. From college, in England.

KAREN:

Pulled an all-nighter?

Toby looks to Liza for guidance. She’s not giving any.

TOBY:

Yes, I, uh, got led astray.

KAREN:

Oh who by?

TOBY:

Uh, well I ran into - people. There’s

some people from - the MoD over and

...

KAREN:

Not Penny Grayling?

TOBY:

Er - no, another - gang?

KAREN:

Right. Wow. I didn’t know you had so

many delegations in town.

TOBY:

(weakly)

The British are coming!

KAREN:

Well, I need to just check out a

couple of things ... this seems like a

good point to break things up.

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SIMON:

Er - no problem.

They start to get up, not quite sure what’s going on.

LIZA:

It’s been great.

SIMON:

Terrific.

KAREN:

I really appreciate this.

TOBY:

Brilliant.

55 INT. STATE DEPARTMENT - DAY 55

Simon and Toby walk out into a larger office. They find

a couple of seats left out for people waiting and sit

down. Various staffers come and go, picking up papers

and files, saying hi, looking knackered, all drinking

either diet cokes or coffees.

TOBY:

Was that...?

SIMON:

Toby -- I don’t want to read you the

riot act here but I am going to have

to read some extracts from the riot

act. Like Section 1 paragraph 1 clause

1. Don’t leave your boss twisting in

the wind and then burst in late

smelling like a pissed seaside donkey.

(special needs)

‘The British are coming’?

TOBY:

Look, chief, I am really sorry okay.

But to be fair I did swing the meeting

in the first place. And I got us on

the committee.

SIMON:

Yes well, you might have just got us

taken off the committee.

TOBY:

(feels he’s taken enough

now)

So I turned up late to the meeting

Simon. I’m sorry. But it’s not like I

threw up in there.

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SIMON:

No you’re right. I should be thanking

you for not throwing up. Well done.

You’re a star. You didn’t wet

yourself, you’re in the right city,

you didn’t say anything overtly

racist, you didn’t pull your dick out

and start plucking it and shouting

'willy banjo'. No I’m being unfair,

you got so much right. Without

actually being there for the beginning

of one of the biggest meetings of my

career. You’re a legend.

An uncomfortable beat.

TOBY:

That was just - the first bit was it?

We’re going back in do you ...think?

SIMON:

We’d barely said hello. I’ve had

muggings that have lasted longer than

that. We really only spoke about

flammable cheese.

TOBY:

Maybe there's some Washington

etiquette where they take a short

break before they start the meeting

proper?

SIMON:

Maybe. They show the opening credits

of a TV show then they have an ad

break.

Liza comes out, passes by. Toby mouths ‘sh*t’ to

himself.

LIZA:

(looking at a list on her

desk, then to a staffer)

Are these all requests to get on the

committee? What’s going on? Did

someone post an invite on Facebook?

I’m drowning in Senators. It’s Senator

soup here.

TOBY:

Hi Liza.

They’re uncomfy with each other.

LIZA:

Hey Toby.

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Toby gets up for a private word.

TOBY:

(re last night)

You feeling okay?

LIZA:

Yes, I’m feeling fine. Why were you

late?

TOBY:

Because...you know...you didn’t wake

me up.

LIZA:

You looked so sweet. I thought you

knew what you were doing.

TOBY:

I was asleep, of course I didn’t.

That’s how people walk out of windows.

Chad is passing. As Liza turns away Toby’s face does a

spasm of regret at his brazen lying.

CHAD:

Everyone is so hot for your paper. I’m

running off another ten copies. It’s

spreading like a virus, Liza. You’re

in hot water. You’re lobsterising.

LIZA:

I don’t feel that.

CHAD:

It’s by degrees. One by one, then -

you’re dead. You’re dinner.

LIZA:

(to Toby)

You know the only reason he comes over

here is he can see in Linton’s office

from my desk.

CHAD:

Yeah, well, I’ll have your desk soon,

now your anti-war paper has declared

war on your career. I smell lobster.

Can you smell lobster, Toby?

Simon calls Toby back over.

SIMON (O.S.)

Mate!

TOBY:

I need to...

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LIZA:

Sure.

Toby goes back to Simon

LIZA (CONT’D)

So, how far would you go with Linton,

you freaky little stalker? Downtown?

Or all the way up Brokeback Mountain?

56 INT. WHITE HOUSE. SMALLISH ROOM - DAY 56

Malcolm is arriving into a meeting room set up with

water etc with a young man who looks like an intern,

A.J.

A.J.

How are you today? Beat the traffic?

Malcolm looking around, as if things aren't right.

MALCOLM:

Yeah yeah. Hunky dory. Can I get a

coffee?

He gives AJ his coat.

A.J.

(doesn’t take coat then

eventually does and just

puts it on a chair, not

the coat stand)

Sure, sure, if we get started, I’ll

get my assistant to bring us some

refreshments.

MALCOLM:

(realising)

Your assistant?

A.J.

(sitting, picking up a

file in the room)

Yeah. So, Item. We need to have a

conversation about the mood of the

British Parliament. Any bumps in the

road ahead.

MALCOLM:

I’m sorry son, am I - is this it? No

offence, but shouldn't you be at

school with your head down a toilet?

A.J.

Your first point there, the offence.

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to take it.

(MORE)

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Your second point. I'm 22. But - item -

It's my birthday in nine days, so if

it would be more comfortable we

could... wait...?

A.J. (CONT'D)

MALCOLM:

Don’t get sarcastic with me son.

(starts dialling)

We burnt this tight-arsed city to the

ground in 1814 and I'm all for doing

it again. Starting with you, you frat

f***. You get sarcastic with me again

and I will stuff so much cotton wool

dowm your f***ing throat it'll come

out of your arse like the wee tail on

a playboy bunny. Okay? I thought...I

was led to believe I was attending

the war committee.

A.J.

Yes, Assistant Secretary of State

Linton Barwick wanted me to brief you

on the work of the Future Planning

Committee.

MALCOLM:

I don’t want the bullshit son, I want

the bull. No one sidelines me. I'm

away.

Malcolm gets up, grabs his coat. An even younger guy

wheels in a coffee trolley.

MALCOLM (CONT'D)

And here we go - the f***ing Vice

President has also graced us with his

presence!

Malcolm runs out, on the phone.

57 INT. STATE DEPARTMENT - DAY 57

Toby and Simon are still waiting.

TOBY:

(re. meeting)

What if it has finished? And Karen

comes and sees us still here that’s

going to be embarrassing. We’ll look

like groupies.

SIMON:

But what if the meeting hasn’t

finished and she comes out and we’ve

done a runner?

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