In the Navy Page #8

Yeah. Who?

You.

I didn't dope nobody. Are

you crazy? Somebody did.

We'd better call the police.

Call somebody! What do you mean?

Don't get excited.

Call somebody!

Take it easy. Calling the

police. Calling all cars.

The captain's been doped.

That thing's out of order.

This thing's out of order.

No use talking to you.

Put that down. That's what

Dynamite sent me down here to fix.

I know, but the captain.

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

I've got an idea.

I've just made you the captain. Good.

I'm the captain.

Could you tell us

where we could find...

Girls.

Pardon us, please.

Hello, Smokey.

How are you, girls?

I've got orders to take you

to the captain's quarters.

The captain's quarters?

Well!

The captain?

Yep. Come on.

We don't know the captain.

Is he expecting us?

Oh, uh, these are guests

of the captain.

All right.

Go right in.

Welcome, girls.

Captain Pomeroy Watson

at your service, miladies.

Is this on the level?

Won't you be seated?

Thank you. It's very

comfortable here.

You must enjoy your quarters.

Money means nothing to me.

Be seated, please.

I have duties to arrange.

Ahem.

Running a ship

is very, very hard.

Captain Pomeroy Watson

speaking.

I don't want to be disturbed for

an hour... maybe two. Aye, aye, sir.

And in the meantime, batten down all

the hatches and furl the mainsails...

and gudgeon the pintles.

Aye, aye, sir.

That's nautical terms.

You gotta talk all that

nautical stuff on a boat.

Everything is shipshape.

Make yourself at home.

Captain Watson?

Call me Pomeroy, Patty.

Pomeroy,

I owe you an apology.

Tush, tush.

That's all...

Somebody's knocking

at the door.

I'll go answer it.

Excuse me.

Yes?

Message for the captain.

That's me.

Message for the captain.

Messages, messages, messages!

That's all I get all day long.

It's enough

to drive you crazy!

Aren't you gonna read it?

It might be important.

Sure, Pomey.

Sure, Pomey.

I'll find out who it's from

and see what it's all about.

Don't be afraid.

That's the only thing this is

good for, opening up letters.

It might be

very important.

Uh-oh.

The admiral.

It's important, all right. May I read it?

I've always wanted to read

official messages. Thanks, Pomey.

Oh, how exciting!

What does it say?

It's from the admiral

in command, Pacific fleet,

to Captain Richards,

commanding U. S...

Captain Richards?

That's code.

Richards,

that's my code name.

Every time they send something,

it's in code.

Oh, of course.

"Committee aboard flagship question

maneuverability of battleships of Alabama class.

Please provide a demonstration

at your earliest possible convenience. "

How thrilling! Can we watch

you commanding your ship?

Please, Pomey.

Come on.

It would be wonderful. We've always

wanted to see something like that. Please.

Sure, okay.

Captain Watson speaking.

Order the engine room to

get up steam. Aye, aye, sir.

And stand by your post.

Standing by, sir.

Adams, didn't I tell you to fix

the captain's communicator?

I'm working on it.

Fix it later.

I've got something

more important for you to do.

Come on.

Get this heliograph together

quick as you can.

There's something

we can fix.

Give me a hand and we'll

splice this up. Swell.

Hey, you kids,

get away from there.!

Never mind the kids.

Just keep working.

You don't understand.

Keep working.

That's fixed. Let's go find something else.

Here's the glass.

Thanks, Pomeroy.

Thank you.

Courtesy of the captain.

I guess the steam's up by now.

Let's go out on deck and see.

Wait a minute.

What's the matter with you? You

can't go out there. It ain't safe.

But the other visitors...

the deck is full of them.

Yeah?

I'll fix that up.

I'll show you

a thing or two.

- I'm the captain. Attention, the bridge!

- Aye, aye, sir.

Send all guests below

and clear the decks for action.

Aye, aye, sir.

The guy must be

a ventriloquist, and clever!

Pass the word.

All visitors below decks.

All hands stand by to get underway.

Clear ship for action.

All visitors below decks. All

hands stand by to get underway.

Clear ship for action.

Weigh the anchors.

Full speed ahead.

Captain Richards certainly got

his ship underway fast, Admiral.

Thank you, Senator.

Duty calls.

How's the longitude?

Take course, north.

Northeast by northeast.

Hey, fellows, look out!

- Attention, the bridge. Port the helm.

- Port the helm.

Starboard the helm.

Aye, aye, sir.

Starboard the helm.

Do something.

Port the helm.

Aye, sir.

Port the helm.

Well, sir? I never saw anything

like it in my life, Admiral.

How would like to see us

go into some real action?

We'd love to, Pomeroy!

Sure.

Attention, the bridge. Man

battle stations. Launch aircraft.

Prepare torpedoes.

All guns, load.

Proceed under forced draft.

Course, due south.

Did you notice the way Richards

launched his planes? Incredible!

Looks like he's heading

straight for us.

Don't worry. Richards is one

of our most able officers.

- Bridge calling the captain.

- What do you want?

My respects for the captain, but we're heading

directly for the flagship at full speed.

Who's running this boat?

You are, sir.

I'll run it. You obey orders.

Do as you're told. Aye, aye, sir.

Attention, the bridge.

Full speed astern.

- We're going full speed ahead.

- Don't argue! Full speed astern.

Aye, aye, sir. Full speed

astern. Aye, aye, sir.

Full speed... Full speed astern!

Full speed astern!

Look out! Look out! We're

gonna get hit. Pomeroy.

Turn the boat! Turn the boat! Pomeroy.

Man overboard! Man overboard! Pomeroy.

All right.

Pull yourself together.

Man overboard. Szzz!

What happened?

Oh, boy! All right. Come out of it.

It's Smokey.

Yes, I'm here.

Did you see it? Torpedo. Szzz. What?

Airplane!

Everything's all right.

Come here.

Don't worry.

Come here. Pull yourself together. Smokey!

What's wrong with you?

The boat's sinking!

Here, here. Come on.

I'm gonna hit the flagship.

Here, here.

What's the matter? Why, you

dope. You doped yourself.

Sure! Who?

You did.

Ah, come on.

Get it together.

Fix yourself up. Get ready

for the entertainment tonight.

I've just had enough

entertainment for a lifetime.

Lifeboats, boats,

airplanes, torpedoes...

For the hundredth time,

Mr. Russ Raymond, I...

The name is Tommy Halstead. Whatever it is!

My boss promised to

destroy the negative.

He double-crossed you,

not me. Yes, of course.

Very well, don't believe me.

I don't and I won't.

All I know is, that due to

your clever camera work,

I'm back in the spot I joined

the navy to get away from.

If I got you out of that spot,

would you forgive me?

Sure.

All right.

Those women are only

running after you because...

they think there's one chance

in a million to land you.

Cut the odds down to nothing.

What do you mean?

They won't run after

a married man, Mr. Stupid!

Oh, I see.

Do you?

Where do you think

you're going... Mrs. Stupid?

Next time, take a picture

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