InAPPropriate Comedy Page #2

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- Is that right?

- Yeah.

Yeah.

What team do you play for?

[LAUGHS]

Ma'am, are you sure?

What?

I like this, the race mixing.

It's a good thing.

It's not enough

to steal our money,

You got to steal

our white women, too.

I like you anyway, though, man.

You're one of those, like,

You're one of those like

white blacks.

It's really quite refreshing.

You're really fun,

man, I tell you what.

You're really funny.

If they were all like you, man.

Is that right?

If they were all like you,

it wouldn't be a problem.

Gotcha. Never would

have had the sixties.

I gotcha, I gotcha.

You know, I don't have a problem

with the back of the bus.

It's cooler there.

But some people got uppity,

and then it's like,

I want to sit in the front,

but I guess not.

Get a load of this idiot right here.

Yeah.

You're just going

to drive away?

Yeah, yeah, I think so, buddy.

All right. I hope you don't

go to jail tonight.

That's your final solution,

then, just drive away.

In your... your German

engineered car.

All right.

[WIND CHIMES CHIMING]

Bro, you want a job?

You looking for work?

I'm waiting for my wife.

She's coming to pick me up.

But in the meantime,

do you want a job?

I got like full-Time job work.

You looking for anything?

Not really. I'm just

waiting for my wife.

All right.

Where'd you get that water?

In there.

Did you pay for it?

Of course.

With food stamps?

[SCOFFS]

My government's supporting you,

bro. It's all right.

Oh, hey, hey.

You looking for work?

Trabajo?

Oh, si.

Trabajo. Do you speak Spanish?

Do you speak English?

Oh, si.

Yo soy bueno.

Bueno.

Yo bueno. Trabajo. All right,

come on, let's do this.

Yo bueno.

Yeah, trabajo, come on.

We got you lots

of American jobs,

Where you can eat

that corn on a stick.

And you save up money,

dinero, and buy a low rider.

And just f***ing ruin

the neighborhoods,

Bring property values

down for everybody.

Si. Dinero, gracias.

Yeah, that's the dream, man.

We'll trabajo the f***

out of your sh*t, bro.

Trabajo?

Yes, yes,

That's what

I'm talking about, Jose.

That's what I'm talking about. You're welcome.

Gracias. Enjoy yourself.

[LAUGHING]

[SPEAKING SPANISH] please!

Ipor favor! Landale!

Isenor, senor, no, no, no!

[YELLING IN SPANISH]

Hey! Hey!

[YELLING IN SPANISH]

I got one for you, bro.

Where's my bounty?

Sir, don't get out of the car.

I f***ing got one.

Find a black, got to park that.

Whoo! Better luck

next time, Paco.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

Sir, hands on the...

hands on the ramp.

Put your hands on the...

put your hands on the bars.

Hands up, on the bars.

Hands on the bars. Ok.

Please explain to this

guy to get off me,

That I'm an American.

Jew S.A.

What?

A Jew S.A.

No, U.S.A.!

Sir...

no, not Jew S.A.!

U.S.A.!

Why is there a man

in the back of your truck?

Yes, exactly. Why do I

have to catch Mexicans.

On our side

of the f***ing border?

That's exactly

the right question.

Jew crazy, man.

Did you call me a Jew?

Yeah, Jew.

Do you know this man?

Jew.

Why is he...

why is in the cage?

And f***ing stay there! Don't

you ever f***ing call me a Jew!

Put him down, put him

down, put him down.

Put him down.

No, no!

I'm swade with "blackass,".

And we like to call

this one the Johnson joust.

Whatever, open your mouth wide.

Get ready for it,

we coming for you.

[INDISTINCT] You ready?

Go for his face because

he used to kissin' 'em.

We got you.

Ohh!

It stayed that hard

when he was with a man.

Ohh!

Shut the f*** up!

That's right.

F*** you, n*gger. N*gger,

check out my King Kong sh*t.

My King Kong sh*t, b*tch.

Yeah, your sh*t little.

All this dick and no

balls, shut the f*** up.

[ALL YELLING]

Oh, sh...

Ohh!

Ohh! To the face!

To the face!

You all right, baby?

You all right?

Watch that thing.

Watch that thing.

Ok, turn around, man.

You're touching my dick, n*gger!

[INDISTINCT CHATTER

AND LAUGHTER]

Boom, n*gger.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Oh, sh*t.

[HUMMING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Welcome to "the porno

review" podcast. I'm JD.

And I'm Harriet

with your female perspective.

Well, like most guys, Harriet,

I hope we go straight

to the titties.

Not a lot of "talking."

No need to worry.

Today's film

is an international one.

Ah, great, a foreign film.

You know what that means.

Relax! He's a seasoned director.

He would never screw up good

Well, I will believe

that when I see it.

[PROJECTOR STARTING]

Oh, honey, please take off that

tacky hat, it make you look gay.

Oh, sorry, honey,

I take it off.

I want to make love to you,

sushi mama.

I give you foreplay.

Lick tongue.

Oh, I feel so good.

Oh, I want you to suck.

[GAGGING]

Oh, I hit a nut.

Good move.

Oh, all right, stand up,

I want to see you naked now.

Taking clothes off.

That's nice. I like it a lot.

Motorboat.

You love the motorboat.

Motorboat. Do the motorboat.

Tonight we make love

on sacred table.

We never make love

on sacred table.

I set you down softly,

my little flower.

Oh, thank you.

Aaah!

You broke sacred table! Ayyy!

I kill you!

Aah!

Ohh! I so sorry.

I got to control my temper.

Oww!

B*tch, I kill you.

I really am sorry

this time, I swear.

Anger management. Ahh.

That is wrong.

That is wrong.

It's foreplay time now.

I give you compilation,

Hong Kong hustle.

And the doggy.

We do the doggy.

You like the doggy?

I do the doggy.

In your face with the doggy.

You can do the doggy, too.

Ha ha ha!

How you like that

right there? Huh?

Look at my nipples!

This is starting

to resemble gay porn.

Hoo-Rah!

Ok. I want

a little number 69,

And I don't mean Mongolian

beef with snow peas.

Give it to me!

Good morning, everybody.

Good news!

You all get a raise...

one cent a week.

Congrats.

That's fantastic,

sir, thank you.

Come on, this is ridiculous.

[CHUCKLES]

All right, fellas,

hurry up on the shoes.

We've got shamwows to make.

Sir, I thought those

were made in Germany.

Ha ha! No.

Oh, yeah, f*** me,

Mr. Miyagi.

Put it in me, Bruce lee.

Oh, yeah, iron sheik

that booty.

What is this

silhouette bullshit?

I call your p*ssy Rhianna,

'Cause my dick's

going to beat it.

Like it's Chris brown.

Oh! Oh, yeah.

Tell me I'm good at math.

You so good at math.

I love the sex.

You are a virgin.

No, I'm not virgin.

I've had more wieners than

eating champ kobayashi.

Oh, you b*tch,

I thought you were a virgin!

My penis burning!

Sushi mama!

[YELLING AND GROANING]

Well, I don't like it.

Relax! Doesn't be

so pessimistic.

I want to see

a chick get naked.

A silhouette scene like this

leaves room for interpretation.

Is he punching her

in the stomach?

Is he fisting her

in the vajoosh?

We decide.

You are one sick

lady. You know?

I just think I heard

my dick gasp.

Wait a minute.

Why is the guy dancing

and wearing a diaper?

I don't get that.

In Japanese culture, foreplay

is an intricate ceremony.

Japanese men are more

sensitive to the clit.

I guess because their penis

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