Inserts Page #4

It's no great shakes, believe me.

Ten minutes and you'll wish

they put some clothes on.

I'm not complaining. I want to see it all.

- Is that him?

- Yeah.

Oh, gee, Mac, I'm so glad to see you.

Did you bring me my little something?

Gonna play guess? You tell me now,

am I hot or cold?

Nix, honey. I'm gone on this kid.

Gee, I guess so.

How about mine? I mean,

God knows I earned it, you know.

- You earned it? Put your pants on first.

- Hey, come on.

Suit yourself. You get used to it.

10 minutes, you'll wish he put his pants on.

I'll put my pants on for you.

I just want my dough.

Here.

Anybody would think you need it worse

than she needs that hooch.

I'm surprised I don't need that stuff,

working in this insane asylum.

- Pipes still on the fritz?

- What do you think? Use the pool.

My God.

Geez.

Hey, how about going

a little slow on that stuff?

I'm getting all goofy inside, it'll be okay.

We got a whole finish, you know.

A lot of inserts to do.

Hey, what are inserts?

Does that mean, you know what?

Yeah, I guess. Ask him.

- We haven't been introduced.

- Introduced?

This is the Boy Wonder. This is Miss Cake.

My fiance maybe.

She wants to know what are inserts.

Inserts are what we're not going

to get done...

as long as you're hanging around here.

- Careful there, bub.

- Oh, well, for God's sake.

You just handed her enough of that dust

to make a rhino do a Rip van Winkle.

And you know damn well that Rex

is all downhill from his pay packet.

I wouldn't be surprised

if he took a powder altogether...

now that he's got that lettuce

in his hot little hand.

So let him! You can get new.

What the hell do you mean get new?

How about the kid we just saw leaving?

- This new kid or whatever?

- Path, Clark Gable.

That's the goof. Ain't she cute?

She wants to be in the movies.

Know anyone that don't?

Listen. I've got half this sperm-jerker

in the can, you know?

If he takes a powder,

I've got to start from scratch.

If what we just seen you doing

is what you got in the can...

then maybe starting from scratch

ain't such a bad idea.

What's the idea of taking the camera

off the stand?

It's a tripod, isn't it?

Yeah, that's it. The tripod. What's the idea

of that? How's that gonna look?

It is not going to look,

it is going to be looked at.

Don't tell me how to make movies.

And don't you tell me not to

tell you how to spend my money.

What's that gonna look like?

Who's gonna pay two bits to look at

something that makes his eyeballs bounce?

Listen, my friend, the syphilitic

perverts that are going...

to spend money to see this film

don't even know they have eyeballs.

Yeah, how come you're always pulling this

stuff with taking the camera off the stand...

and writing these bone-ass scripts,

and taking pictures from the ceiling...

and from under the bed,

and from between people's legs?

And all that other fancy crap

that nobody else does?

I swear you do it just to rile me,

pure and simple.

Nothing pure, old sport, is ever simple.

- Loaded up and ready to go.

- Harlene, you don't need that.

I mean you don't need that much.

Come on now, honey. You better turn out

them lights. The bulbs are gonna burn out.

- You seen my lucky necktie?

- Hey.

Don't you just jab that stuff

in front of Miss Cake here.

- Oh, really, Mac.

- No soap! It's degenerate.

I don't want her to look at it.

- You gave her the stuff.

- What do you mean, "gave"? She earned it.

Now come on, honey,

elsewhere with that stuff.

Yeah, well, I'm trying to find

my lucky necktie.

Mac, I told you, I want to see it all.

Well, this ain't part of it,

this ain't part of nothing. Come on.

Come here.

We were doing okay, weren't we?

Okay? We were doing swell.

What the hell do you need all that stuff for?

Now don't start this stuff.

I ain't got your imagination.

- Harlene, when are you going to learn?

- You're the one that's got to learn.

You got to learn not to start this stuff.

I ain't got your imagination.

I just get kind of tired, need a shot.

That's all.

I'll be back with you in a minute.

I just need a shot, that's all.

Hell, I ain't gonna find that lucky necktie.

Harlene, wait a second.

Look, I can get rid of them.

Don't do that. I need an audience...

- lots of times.

- No, you don't.

Sure I do.

You don't.

That's how come you don't know

how bad I need a shot.

- Harlene.

- Hey.

You better turn off them lights.

The bulbs are gonna burn out.

Smart cookie.

I like a dame who saves me dough.

You know...

I ought to take her

out of that owl wagon she slings in.

Stick her in one of my joints.

If only she wasn't a hophead.

Gee, she's a lot smaller than

she looks in the movies.

What's this? Where'd you see her

in the movies?

Back in Chicago, same as everybody.

The real movies, silly. When

she used to be in the real movies, not-

You mean the real movies?

Can you beat that? I thought you meant

you'd seen... Can you beat that?

What would be so terrible

if I had seen what you thought I meant?

Listen, if I ever catch you

hanging around the chip houses...

- where they put this load of junk-

- You treat me like a child.

You're the one that calls me Daddy.

Is this kid a sketch or what?

Come on, honey. I only kid you

'cause I go for you so.

- Here's a thought, Mac.

- What's that?

You going and take her with you.

You watch your step, there, bub.

I don't care what this whosits

from Path says...

you're skating on thin ice with me.

What who said?

Don't your neighbors ever say anything

about that swimming pool back there?

What neighbors?

He's the only one left on this block.

Ain't you heard?

They're gonna run a whatsits through here.

- A road. A fast-way.

- Freeways, they call them.

Yeah, that's it. Freeways.

Smart Boy could've been into

some of the big bucks...

if he had scribbled his chits right.

Anybody with a yolk in his egg

has his dough tied up in these freeways.

I'm good for about $50,000.

Land? Buy cheap and sell big?

You're pretty smart, Big Mac.

Land's strictly small-time.

The real dough's in hamburgers.

Hamburgers?

Say, he's okay. What can he do about it?

This is a million-dollar idea

and he ain't got jack-sh*t.

Pardon my French.

Now here's the deal, you got a lot of these...

whatsits, these freeways.

You got a lot of cars on them, right?

You got a lot of cars,

you got a lot of hungry rubes in them.

Yeah, sure.

Well, there you go, kiddo.

It's as simple as that.

I'm gonna build me a mess of hamburger

stands and a mess of gas stations.

But here's your angle,

I'm gonna build them exactly alike.

I'll run them up one side of the road

and down the other...

and they're all gonna look exactly alike.

So your cruising rube don't know what

he's getting when he pulls in, see?

He don't know from gas,

he don't know from hamburgers...

he don't gotta think about nothing.

He's just got to eat.

Yeah, but what if he pulls into a gas station,

you know?

That's what I'm talking about, here, buster.

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