Invader Zim Enter The Florpus

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I used to look up at space

with hope and wonder

in my eyes.

Until space looked back.

Invader Zim,

evil,

alien soldier of the Irken Empire

sent by his diabolical masters,

the Almighty Tallest,

to infiltrate Earth

and prepare it for

the coming invasion.

Disguised as one of us,

he moved into my neighborhood,

he went to my school,

and with the help

of his vile mechanical servants,

plotted to destroy

everything we have,

everything we are.

And then...

he vanished.

My name is Dib Membrane.

I'm 12 years old.

And I'm all that stands

between Zim

and the annihilation

of our world.

Prepare your starving,

gurgling child-bellies

for the awesome eventuality

of dinner!

Foodio 3000 hopes you love

what I have made.

Also, what is love?

Looks great, Dad.

I'm gonna eat that food.

Hold up now, daughter!

Isn't it time your brother joined us?

Oh, man, no.

Since Zim vanished,

Dib's been in his room for,

like, a million years.

I hardly recognize him anymore.

He just sits there in that chair

getting grosser...

smellier.

He sure does,

but try to be

more understanding.

Dib's finally letting go

of his silly obsession

with aliens and ghosts

and all his other

non-scientific nonsense.

And it's not easy for him.

Imagine if you stopped believing in,

oh, video games.

Don't even joke about that, Dad.

Honey, letting go of silly ideas

is just part of growing up.

Why, as a child,

I thought sharks were my friends.

I know better now.

So, try to be more supportive.

He's your brother, after all.

Okay, Dad.

Hey, Dib!

Dad says come to dinner!

You know

I can't leave my post, Gaz.

Just shove the food in here.

Where's the shoving stick?

I can't shove without

the shoving stick.

Zim's still out there, Gaz,

so I have to wait

and watch.

No one else will.

They could never see the truth.

Why, though? Brainwashing?

Mind control?

Brain-erasing ghosts?

Nobody believes me now,

but I'll make them see.

I'll expose Zim to the world,

and open humanity's eyes

to the danger they were in all along.

Even Dad, world-famous

man of science will say,

"I believe you, Dib.

I'm sorry I ever doubted you."

That's the worst

Dad impression ever,

but, Dib, let it go.

Zim's been gone a long time,

and as far as you know,

he might just be gone for good.

I'd be willing to bet

that Zim will never, ever...

Oh, wait, there he is.

It's Zim!

He's back!

And he's doing stretches!

Nobody stretches like that

unless they're warming up for evil!

This is it! The...

moment I've been...

waiting for!

What are you doing?

Gotta get to Zim!

Dib, no. Look at you.

The world's not ready to see

what you've become.

You're hideous!

The smell!

The world...

needs me!

Take a bath first!

Take...

Take a bath!

No!

Zim!

Yes, it is I, and... Hmm?

Oh, wait, sorry.

You'll have to move along,

hideous goblin.

I'm posing dramatically

for when the Dib shows up.

- I am Dib.

- What?

- Ugh, ugh, ugh! Ugh!

- But...

- Give me a sec here.

- We know each other.

I've been expecting you, Dib!

I can tell.

You set up sprinklers

and everything.

You can't prove anything!

- Anyhow, I...

- Where have you been, Zim?

I've been monitoring

your house, the school,

that taco place

you love so much.

No, no.

GIR loves that place.

I think it's dirty.

- I ate a baby there.

- He did.

What have you been up to, Zim?

Phase one

of my evil plan, human.

Phase one.

Computer! Laugh with me!

I don't want to.

You've been in your house

sitting in the toilet all this time?

- Yes.

- Like, the whole time?

That's right.

Did you have to sit in the toilet?

Do not try to understand

the ways of my people, Dib!

From the moment

my mission began

on this horrible planet,

you've been there,

haunting my every move

like a squak

in my shmoopsquizz.

- A what in your huh?

- Uh-huh!

And while the rest of your kind

were easily fooled,

you were able to see through

my brilliant disguise.

Martha!

- Eh?

- The neighbor boy's an alien!

Never mind, Martha.

- He's normal.

- Okay.

I knew if I vanished

for long enough,

you'd just watch and wait,

your neglected body

growing smelly

and useless.

But that was only Phase One

of my evil plan.

Well, keep watching, Dookie-Dib.

Watch helplessly as I begin...

Phase Two!

- Hah!

- No!

I'm switching people's mail around.

That's illegal. No!

I'm reading

someone's newspaper.

I don't pay for a subscription.

Nobody reads newspapers anymore,

but, no, stop!

Minimoose, get in on this mayhem!

That's my mom's pizza sticker.

She is crazy for pizza.

Hey, what... what are you...

Hey, that... that's...

Hey, don't... Wait.

Don't! Don't!

Don't!

Excellent.

Me! Me!

Let me do one.

I launched that pug into space.

I thought you liked that pig.

- Why I do that?

- What's the matter, human?

Why aren't you stopping me?

Can't fight back.

Sat too long.

Chair fused to butt.

More chair than man now.

Humans are such fragile, goopy things.

No Irken would ever

become a chair.

Wait! Was that Phase Two?

Of course it was!

Probably. Uh...

You know what?

Now I'm not sure.

Either way,

you're helpless to stop me,

Chair-Dib.

So long!

Welcome home, son.

Zim!

Excellent work, me.

All is going according to plan,

but there's still much to do, GIR.

Yes, sir!

I bloop you, Schmoopsy!

Floopsy...

Aww.

Computer?

What?

Open a connection with

the Almighty Tallest,

my leaders and biggest fans.

Preparing to call The Tallest.

You see, GIR, The Tallest...

Now calling The Tallest!

The Tallest

haven't heard from me,

their greatest

and most incredible invader,

in a very long time.

They'll be sick with worry.

Hey, remember Invader Zim?

- Who?

- Zim.

Tiny?

Screamed a lot?

The guy that sends us the donuts?

No, that's Invader Jim.

He's great.

Oh, wait. Zim.

- We hate him!

- Yeah, that's him.

Remember the time

we lied and told him

we were sending him on

a secret mission to Earth,

but really we were just getting

rid of him because he's awful?

Yeah. We're hilarious.

My Tallest,

there's an incoming transmission.

Yep, life's been pretty great

ever since

Zim vanished for good.

Anyhow, send that transmission through.

I wonder who it could ever be.

It is I, Zim!

My Tallest, you will be overjoyed to know

Phase One of my most ingenious plan

to prepare Earth

for your arrival was a success.

Zim, we thought you were dead.

Could a dead Zim do this?

Sirs,

my Earthly arch-nemesis

is now a sad chair,

leaving me free to complete

the most diabolical phase of my plan,

Phase Two,

wherein I, uh...

Uh, uh, uh...

Computer, put them on hold.

Oh, no.

I really can't remember

what Phase Two is.

I must have sat in that toilet too long.

Think, Zim. Think.

We don't care, Zim.

Why didn't I write it down?

Wait! Computer,

play back any recordings

of me discussing Phase Two.

One recording found.

Would you like me to record any

and all mention of Phase Two?

No, thank you.

Zim forgets nothing.

Hmm, besides reminding me

how cool I look and sound,

that was of no help.

He knows we can still see

and hear him, right?

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