It Takes Two Page #3

Before we sit down to dinner.

my future stepdaughter...

...whom I absolutely adore...

...has consented to play

one of the pieces...

...that won her first prize

at the Windsor Academy youth recital.

Hold it! Time-out.

I can't play the piano.

I just told them you would.

Then do me a grand favor

and untell them!

If you embarrass me

in front of all these people...

...I'll make sure that

you never play anything...

...ever again.

Have I made myself clear?

Clear as glass.

In fact, I can see right through you.

Ladies and gentlemen.

Normally, I'd be tickled

to play a selection...

...from...

...Chopin.

But in honor of my new stepmother...

...whom I absolutely adore...

...I decided to play

a little something of my own.

Do you think my daughter's

asking for attention?

I'd say she's demanding it.

Finn!

Huckleberry Finn!

You got it!

The guys are ahead of us

by eight seconds.

-Amanda, it's your turn. Go, girl!

-Me?

You're the best.

Show them what you got.

Look at her. She's nervous!

Yeah, so?

The old Amanda wasn't

scared of nothing.

What am I supposed to do?

Ready.

Set.

Go!

Song!

What happened?

''London Bridge is Falling Down'' !

That's it!

You may enter.

Mind if we talk?

Whatever about?

Clarice.

None of that.

She was upset with your performance.

Shouldn't you give her a chance?

I did, and she's a big phoney-baloney.

if you ask me.

I've never heard you this outspoken.

It'd be nice to have a mother.

Yeah, and it'd be nice

to have a father too. I mean--

No, no. Sweetheart. I think the

person you're really angry at...

...is me.

You?

What'd you do?

I haven't been much of a father lately.

I haven't seen you.

But all that's going to change.

Clarice is going back to the city.

Gee, I hope it was nothing I did.

No, she's got a wedding to plan, but

we'll get to spend some time together.

Get to know each other again.

Is that okay?

Let's tuck you in.

you little snuggler.

See you tomorrow.

Good night, honey.

I like having a father.

I like having a daughter.

Good night, sweetie.

Lights out!

Lights out, cabin three!

-Come on, come on.

-This I got to see!

We're going to get caught.

I just know it!

Come on, Frankie. It's a full moon!

Shut up, stupid!

lombies hear better than dogs.

It's a frog!

Amanda? Scared of a frog?

She's changed, all right!

Now do you believe me?

Yeah, she's one of them pod people.

Let's get out of here!

A frog?

You know what?

You should have kissed it.

He might've turned out

to be Prince Charming.

Grose!

Not for you. For me!

You'd kiss a frog?

No.

Toads are my specialty.

Big, old, ugly suckers

with tongues like this.

-It is not.

-It is too!

-How else am I going to catch a guy?

-I don't know.

There's that smile!

And that time. I think it went

all the way up to your eyes.

You remind me of someone.

I do? Who?

Someone I've never met.

How, if you've never met her?

Sometimes when I dream.

I think I see her.

You know, you've been acting

just a little bit weirder today.

I think maybe it's all this fresh air.

Don't make fun.

Sorry.

Usually you're such a tough guy.

Don't tell anyone, okay?

Scout's honor.

I mean, after all, I wouldn't

want to spoil my reputation none.

None.

I've got an idea.

Let's go spy on the boys.

Safe trip, honey.

Oh, my God!

How was the party?

Well, the good news is

Clarice is gone.

You did it!

The bad news is

she'll be back in a week.

Oh, you didn't.

What's a cool guy like your dad

doing with a witch like her?

It's too bad he didn't

meet Diane first.

Now, she's awesome.

Yeah, they'd be perfect

for each other.

You're not thinking what

I hope you're not thinking.

Want to bet?

But he's getting married!

They got to meet once.

Then they'll fall in love for sure.

How do you know?

Because Diane says, when it happens.

it happens like that.

Okay, so look.

You go back to Diane

and I'll go back to your dad.

Wait! Why not the other way around?

You know what he likes.

and I know what she likes.

They need all the help they can get.

But how will we get them together?

I can't believe I let you

talk me into this.

You're too tense. Relax.

I got 1.000 pounds of animal

under my butt, and she says, "Relax."

Move with the horse

and you'll be fine.

When did you become an expert

all of a sudden?

Ain't you never seen a Western?

Honey, the last Western I saw

was an omelet.

What happened to those

equestrian classes you took?

Are you asking me a question?

Come on.

I'll race you to the lake.

No, no. Slow is good.

I like to enjoy the scenery.

I got spurs that jingle jingle jangle

As I ride merrily along

We're doing a good job, aren't we?

I'm finally getting the hang of this.

I'm getting the hang of this!

Oh, come on, Amanda.

My voice isn't that bad!

I been in the desert

On a horse with no name

It's good to get out of the rain

Not only is she an excellent rider.

she's a gourmet cook...

...she paints...

...she speaks four languages....

You know, honey.

you could learn a lot from Clarice.

Alyssa, there's a....

Honey!

Come here! Come here!

Where is that girl?

Did you bring it?

Whoa, bud!

Someone turn this thing off!

Stop this right now!

I'm telling you! Stop!

Step on it!

Oh, dear! Oh, my!

Help me!

Somebody help me!

Hang on!

Call 911 !

Slow down.

Don't talk to me!

Talk to the horse!

I was talking to the horse!

Okay, it's okay.

I'm on a killer!

They gave me the killer horse!

Relax.

You okay?

I about dropped

my transmission back there.

If it's any consolation, I used to

look like a real jerk on a horse.

How many fingers, cowboy?

Six.

Close enough.

Can you stand?

Which is more bruised.

my butt or my ego?

Have someone take a look at that.

-My butt?

-No.

That cut. Right there.

Oh, great.

We have first aid at the camp.

Oh, thanks.

I just live over here.

Are you Roger Callaway?

-I think so.

-The Roger Callaway?

From the Callaway Foundation?

Yeah, that's me.

I'm Diane Barrows. I always wanted

to meet you. My kids love your camp.

You have kids?

They're not mine. I work for

the East Side Children's Center.

Of course.

It was nice to meet you, Mr. Callaway.

Roger, please.

And thank you for saving my life.

And you really should put

some iodine on your butt.

Cut.

Miss Barrows....

b.

I was wondering if

I could offer you iced tea.

I'd love to hear more about

the camp and how it's going.

Only if we walk.

You took the words out of my mouth.

Come on.

Now hold still.

You certainly are an angel of mercy.

-I see worse cuts than this every day.

-Thanks.

My gang always invents

new ways to get hurt.

-You must really love children.

-What's not to love?

-No, really.

-You big baby! Come here.

ls that better?

I can't hear anything!

We've got to get closer!

You know, you're not at all

what I expected.

Really?

What were you expecting?

Blue blood, for one thing.

I thought you'd be some rich, big.

old, fat geezer who smokes cigars.

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