It Takes Two Page #6

You got her.

I want her back.

What are you talking about?

I don't have her.

I don't even know her.

Yes, you do.

This is Alyssa Callaway.

No, you'd better get

your eyes checked because...

...this is a little girl

named Amanda.

This is your Amanda.

Oh, my God!

Look, they're identical.

This is amazing.

Yeah. And it's weird too.

I understand...

...that through some simple mix-up...

...that Alyssa is in the care

of Child Services.

I've been authorized to tell you...

...that if I get her back.

there'll be no legal entanglements.

She's not exactly with me here.

She's been....

Well, she was adopted.

Then you better un-adopt her quick.

Mr. Callaway's getting married

in 90 minutes.

He's expecting

his real daughter there.

Ninety minutes?

I can't get to Staten Island

and back in 90 minutes.

Well, could I suggest that

you go really, really fast?

Here.

If you get into any trouble...

...call this number.

Ask for Lou.

Lou who?

Well, hey.

Look at this mess.

Clean it up.

You clean it.

Put a cork in it, okay?

He's management.

My father's Roger Callaway...

...and when he finds out

what you're doing here...

...he's going to buy this whole town

and kick you out of it.

Roger Callaway? Then how come

you ain't at his wedding?

Come on, Diane. You can do it.

We might have to stall a bit.

How?

How should I know?

You're the brains of this operation.

I must be crazy.

But I am not going in that church.

No matter what happens.

I am not going in that church.

It's only natural to be nervous.

-I was thinking about the World Series.

-Baseball?

Did you ever hit a home run?

Not recently.

You know when it's

bottom of the ninth...

...the bases are loaded...

...and you know the next one's

coming right down the middle?

And then...

...you just connect.

And for an instant...

...you know that it's going

over the fence and out of the park...

...further than

you could ever imagine.

Yeah, that's a great feeling.

Clarice hates baseball.

Come on, Sea Biscuit.

Don't fail me now.

Hello! Hello!

You looking for a Butkis?

You looking for a Butkis?

Yes, I am.

Do you know where he is?

At the salvage yard, where else?

Harry works those kids to the bone.

What?

Why do you think he's got so many?

Can I use your phone?

Yeah, sure. No charge.

We've been looking for you...

...Your Highness.

Leave me alone!

But Your Majesty...

...we brought you something.

Yeah, something to make you feel...

...more at home.

I knew somebody in this church

would have a Prozac.

What is taking so long?

Relax. Enjoy the moment.

This is the happiest day

of your life.

I'm happy.

Don't I look happy?

This is me happy! See?

Happy, happy, happy!

Let's get the show on the road!

Here's your royal throne...

...Alyssa Callaway.

Hail, Betty.

Oueen of the scrap heap.

Hail, Betty!

My name's Alyssa Callaway!

Yeah, right. And I'm Princess Di.

Attention, Harry Butkis.

We're here to pick up

Alyssa Callaway.

All you kids in the yard.

Stand clear.

We're coming in.

Told you!

Alyssa Callaway?

I've got to get you to that church.

That is my kid!

Out of my way, piece of junk!

I would love to kill you...

...before I turn you over

to Social Services.

Alyssa, go ahead. Hurry!

Oh, God!

Hi. How you doing?

Good to see you.

Hi, Granny. Nice hat.

Thanks for coming.

Get moving!

Any slower and she'd be

walking backwards.

She's just not herself today.

We'll never make it.

We only have 10 minutes.

So Lou, how close can you land

this thing to the church?

Central Park close enough?

Central Park? The Central Park?

That'll do.

Who would've thought my first girl

would be the last to get married?

Shut up!

Enough of this.

I'm here. Let's do it.

We are gathered here

in the sight of God...

...to join in holy matrimony...

...Clarice and Roger.

I'm not going in the church.

I'm not going in the church.

Oh, no.

Not another horse.

Come on!

Fine!

Where is the driver?

Hey, buddy!

Take us to St. Bart's.

It's an emergency.

Yeah? So's this.

I'm on my break!

Thank you for all your help, bud.

That's my horse!

Faster, horsey, faster!

To have and to hold.

for richer or poorer...

...in sickness and health.

as long as you live?

I do. I really do. Now him.

Hit the brakes! Hit the brakes!

-Hang on!

-I'm hanging on!

What street's it on again?

54th and Park.

Are we there yet?

Almost!

Signal!

And do you, Roger...

...take this woman, Clarice...

...to be your lawful wedded wife?

To have and to hold...

...for richer, for poorer...

...and in sickness and in health...

...as long as you both shall live?

Oh, God! We made it.

Aren't you coming?

No, I think I'll just wait

for Amanda out here.

Diane Barrows!

Get your butt up here...

...this instant!

I'll stand in the back...

...and take a little look-see.

I....

I can't.

Excuse me? What did you say?

I'm so sorry. I can't.

I should've said something earlier.

I'm in love with someone else.

I guess I deserve that.

This is all your fault!

Lady...

...if you touch that child...

...I'll pop you one, so help me God.

Oh, my God!

There's two of them!

It's a conspiracy!

Well, at least I'll get to

hit one of you.

Back off, Barbie!

And by the way...

...you have a little bit

of something on your teeth.

I have never been more

humiliated in my life!

Want to bet?

Daddy!

Oh my God!

About time you showed up.

We got here soon as we could.

Hi, Daddy.

Impossible.

Nothing's impossible.

Right. Alyssa?

You got that right.

Wait, if you're...

...my....

Who are you?

Name's Amanda. Put her there.

I'm with her.

Well, I guess we're even.

What do you mean?

You saved my life.

Sorry, I didn't want

the wrong girl to go down the aisle.

I mean, the wrong flower girl.

You had it right the first time.

Told you.

Third time's a charm.

Wait a minute.

All of this was your doing?

It was, was it?

Well, ladies, what do you have

to say for yourselves?

So kiss already!

-Put her there.

-Sister.

And it's a high flyball...

...over the left field wall.

Excuse me.

This gentleman claims...

...that the ladies stole his buggy.

He's right. We did!

You did go out of your way.

It was her idea.

I'd like you to ask

that nice gentleman if he'd sell.

I don't care how much. That horse

deserves a house in the country.

I trust we can make

some kind of arrangement.

Girls, what do you say

we do a little sightseeing?

And then you girls

can tell us the whole story.

Driver, once around the park.

if you please.

It'll be my pleasure, boss.

Walk on. Duke!

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