Jeff Dunham: Spark of Insanity

Synopsis: Jeff Dunham and his socially reckless "suitcase posse" are back in this highly anticipated follow-up to Arguing with Myself, his breakthrough television special! What's next? An ALL NEW show that is Bigger... Better... and Funnier than ever! This time, Dunham welcomes two never-before-seen partners "Achmed the Dead Terrorist," and "Melvin the Superhero." Long-time favorites "Peanut," "Walter" and Jose Jalapeno...On a STEEK! are back in an entirely original show for everyone!
Director(s): Michael Simon
 
IMDB:
8.1
NOT RATED
Year:
2007
80 min
3,127 Views


Walter:
All those kids and their hipping and their hopping.

Pull up your damn pants, you morons!

Jeff:
Second Comedy Central special, it's gonna be great!

No, Mommy. I don't want to wear the pink bow.

Peanut:
He even does this in his sleep. What a freak!

"Would you idiots give it a rest?"

Jose:
Would you like to see my stick?

JEFF DUNHAM:

SPARK OF INSANITY

Jeff:
Thank you! Thank you. Are you doing alright? Thank you. Thank you so much. Alright. Thank you. Thank you so much. Well you can't fool me. I know every bit of that it's all for the little guys in the suitcase. Thank you so much for coming out tonight. This is such a pleasure. Before we start, I must say it is a true honor to be in this theater with you people, in the capital of the greatest country in the world the United States of America.

And driving around the city the last couple of days I couldn't help but realize that here in D.C., just like everywhere else in the country gas prices suck! My wife and I live in L.A., and not long ago we were the proud owners of 2 big giant SUVs. We decided to do the economically and ecologically right thing. We got rid of one of the big, giant SUVs and got a Prius. I don't know why you're laughing, it's a great vehicle. You jump on the freeway and punch it, it goes: When you can drive

underneath an 18- wheeler and go: "That's really dirty",

and drive back out... That is just too damned small.

It's cool at the gas pump. On one tank you've driven 2 or 3000 miles. You fill up and go: "Oh, all done! I'll be damned." "10 cents? That's amazing!" I'm not used to a vehicle like this. I've had big trucks and SUVs. The one vehicle I refuse to get rid of, I've had it for 10 years.

I love this thing. I've taken good care of it. It's not politically correct to drive it. I don't care. H-1 Hummer. The real one, the big one, the military version.

I love this thing. It has a 38- gallon tank.

Gets 7 miles to the gallon.

Diesel, where I live, at its peak was $3.84 per gallon.

Yeah. I went to fill it up that week, it wasn't even empty.

It cost me a hundred forty-eight dollars. I pushed the vehicle home. As I rolled it into the driveway, I told my kids: "Girls, look at our new front yard ornament."

"Get in the Prius."

"You suck, Dad!"

I used to pick Priuses out of the grill of my Hummer.

During the holidays last year, we took the Hummer in for maintenance. Then we were driving home and my wife is behind me in the Hummer. I'm in front driving the Prius.

I was tricked somehow. I don't know how that happened.

She calls me on the cellphone, and she's laughing. Let me explain why. Our Prius is not a black Prius. It's not a red Prius, it's a blue Prius. But not really blue. It's more of a... blue... Prius. It's pretty. Sparkly! I did that a little too well, didn't I? While I'm driving, I'm holding in my

arm, my wife's 3- pound Chihuahua. You have to hold it while you drive or it'll fall down between the seats.

"Where the hell is this dog? Oh, there you are!"

"Let me put down the parking brake, that'll hold you, you bastard." "I've got to shift... Oh!" "That was your head? I'm sorry. I thought it was the shifty thingy."

"Same size. Leather, fur, I don't know the difference."

"I thought I was grinding the gears." Thanks for laughing at that. That's the stupidest joke I tell all night. That morning, I don't know why I didn't see it, my children had taken vinyl window holiday decorations, and put them all over the back window of the Prius. Christmas trees, Santa Claus. Snowflakes. It was so pretty. My wife calls me, laughing hysterically. "What's so funny?"

"Can you see yourself?" "You're driving a powder blue Prius, holding a 3- pound Chihuahua." "There's pretty Christmas decorations all over your car."

"And you make a living with dolls. You're gay!" - Click.

And I'm like, "B*tch!" - click.

And a Chihuahua. That's my wife's idea of a family pet.

The dog I picked out is Bill, our Golden Retriever. He's 80 pounds. Now that is a dog, ladies and gentlemen.

I named him Bill because I got him when Clinton was in office, and as a puppy, he was humping everything.

When it comes to dogs. I have criteria for what is and is not a dog. Here is what is not a dog: anything that bounces when it barks. Not a dog: anything I can easily

drop kick over my back fence. Not a dog: anything that is regularly terrified by a running leaf. That's not a dog, that's a yapping Beanie Baby, that's what that is. It's the Richard Simmons of canines, that's all I'm saying.

"Honey, what was that?" "I don't know!", Bill's sitting next to me: "I don't know either!" "You're a genius, do it again!"

Size does matter in the canine brain. Bill, Golden Retriever, very smart animal. If he pooped on the living room carpet, I stuck his nose in it. Three times later, he figured out: "I'm not supposed to crap here." Next two dogs, same thing. Now the brain dead Chihuahua comes along. She poops on the carpet, I stick her nose in it, three times later she thinks, "I'm not supposed to crap, ever." And that's why they shake. Another way Chihuahuas prove their lack of intelligence: Most dogs know when you find a stick in the yard and you run with it, you put the stick in your mouth sideways. I am not kidding. This little idiot dog found a stick as long as she was, and she stuck it in her mouth straight out the front.

This is all true. We're on the couch watching TV. She runs through the house, as fast as she can, stick straight out.

As she runs across the carpet she decides to quickly look down. Oh yeah. Stick in the carpet, crammed down her throat. With momentum, she actually pole vaulted over the stick.

Of course my wife and my girls are all... I couldn't breathe, I was laughing so hard. I thought, "Damn, if she'd been going a little faster, I'd have a new puppet.

A Chihuahua on a stick!" My wife started going nuts

with the Chihuahua thing. She named her Chihuahua Darby. After a year and a half my wife decided it was time to breed the dog. My wife got on the internet and

found the 3- pound... stud... Chihuahua. I don't know how you call anything that's 3 pounds 'a stud'.

We picked up little Jake. The owner wanted to get rid of him. So Jake came to live at our house. He was full grown, ready to go. Then Darby came in heat. Not long after that we had three tiny little Chihuahua puppies.

The two larger ones my wife gave away. The runt of the litter... The runt from two 3- pound dogs we decided to keep. Rusty is now full- grown, at a whopping 1.8 pounds. The cool part is he and 80- pound Bill are best friends. I don't know how you can be best friends, with someone who is the same size as your poop.

My kids question whether I'm funny or not. I pointed that out in the backyard to them. I'm a comedy genius now! The cool part is little Rusty picked me over everyone else to bond with. He likes me best,

we don't know why. I kinda like it. I come home, he runs

to the front door, I pick him up, take him to my office. I have a stuffed car, he sits in that car. If he sits just right, it looks like he's driving around my desk. People walk in my office, "It's a rat! Oh, it's your dog." The bond between Rusty and me has gone beyond just companionship. There's an emotional bond. This has happened 5 times. It can't be coincidence. The three Chihuahuas sleep in the bed with my wife and me.

My wife and I will get into an argument, go to bed angry.

You're not supposed to do that, but we're tired.

Rusty hears the argument, knows we're not happy with each other. But he takes my side. At 3 or 4 in the morning, he will wake up, and pee on my wife.

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Jeff Dunham

Jeffrey "Jeff" Dunham (born April 18, 1962) is an American ventriloquist and comedian who has also appeared on numerous television shows, including Late Show with David Letterman, Comedy Central Presents, The Tonight Show and Sonny With a Chance. He has six specials that run on Comedy Central: Jeff Dunham: Arguing with Myself, Jeff Dunham: Spark of Insanity, Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas Special, Jeff Dunham: Controlled Chaos, Jeff Dunham: Minding the Monsters, and Jeff Dunham: All Over the Map. Dunham also starred in The Jeff Dunham Show, a series on the network in 2009.His style has been described as "a dressed-down, more digestible version of Don Rickles with multiple personality disorder". Describing his characters, Time magazine said, "All of them are politically incorrect, gratuitously insulting and ill tempered." Dunham has been credited with reviving ventriloquism, and doing more to promote the art form than anyone since Edgar Bergen.Dunham has been called "America's favorite comedian" by Slate.com, and according to the concert industry publication Pollstar, he is the top-grossing standup act in North America, and is among the most successful acts in Europe as well. As of November 2009, he has sold over four million DVDs, an additional $7 million in merchandise sales, and received more than 350 million hits on YouTube as of October 2009 (his introduction of Achmed the Dead Terrorist in Spark of Insanity was ranked as the ninth most watched YouTube video at the time). A Very Special Christmas Special was the most-watched telecast in Comedy Central history, with its DVD selling over 400,000 in its first two weeks. Forbes.com ranked Dunham as the third highest-paid comedian in the United States behind Jerry Seinfeld and Chris Rock, and reported that he was one of the highest-earning comics from June 2008 to June 2009, earning approximately $30 million during that period. Dunham also does occasional acting roles. He achieved the Guinness Book of World Records record for "Most tickets sold for a stand-up comedy tour" for his Spark of Insanity tour, performing in 386 venues worldwide. more…

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