Joshua
(drumroll)
(rousing orchestral
fanfare playing)
(fanfare ends)
(children laughing and playing)
(people cheering)
You're playing like
You're playing like a little girl!
Good, good hustle.
Good hustle!
Hustle!
What? Okay, I'm coming!
Sorry! Sorry! I'm sorry.
Excuse me!
We got to go.
Sorry.
We've got to go!
It's an emergency!
Come on, come on, buddy.
Hey!
Joshua, let's go!
Let's go, buddy.
Josh!
Oh...
Ah...
(horn blaring)
(baby crying)
(babies fussing and crying)
(woman speaking indistinctly
over P.A.)
Oh, my little worm.
Oh, God, I love her so much.
Hello, sweetie.
She looks like...
She...
(laughing)
(laughter continues)
Look at this little...
(laughing)
Hey.
Did it hurt, Mommy?
Oh, yeah, it did, but not anymore.
(piano playing gentle melody)
(piano continues playing)
Oh,you did?
- (speaking gibberish)
- (barks)
Oh, not you, Buster.
Oh, Buster!
Baby, I thought we were
keeping him locked up.
Okay, okay.
You been listening to Bartok?
(playing gentle melody)
I'll see your Bartok
and raise you one
Rodgers and Hammerstein.
You hammer any
of these nails yourself?
Uh, no, Dad, we had a contractor.
I can't imagine what that cost you.
Shame, nothing like putting
your own sweat into a home.
Oh, there's sweat in here,
believe me.
HAZEL:
By the way it's not rareto have a grandmother
stay and help with the newborn.
- Oh, no...
- It would be my pleasure.
- No, Hazel.
- (baby fussing)
We're fine.
Are you sure, Abby?
Yes, Mom, we'll be fine.
- Because, you should have help.
- (fussing)
No.
HAZEL:
At least have a nanny.I mean, isn't that what
rich people do in New York?
- Mom, we're fine, really.
- We're also not crazy
about this idea of
Well, you would hardly notice me.
(playing stops)
These ten little Indians
are all out of arrows.
Well, I hope you won't
make me sing, Ned.
A glorious light
should shine, Hazel.
(Hazel laughing)
You flatterer.
NED:
You know, I don't know
if you were interested
in seeing a show.
I can get you tickets.
HAZEL:
I only want to seeone of your shows, Ned.
Well, you're three years
too late on that one.
Aw, but what a success.
(begins playing classical piece)
Mmm, I suppose.
Oh, this is the piece that he's
playing for the school recital.
Uh-huh. Can he play, like,
"Jesus is my Savior" or...
BRAD:
I don't think so, Mom.
Oh, that's a shame.
(continues playing)
Abby, do you think
you could part with that
bundle of joy for just a second?
I need some cuddle time.
Oh!
Oh, precious little lady.
Look at you!
Oh, well, she sure has that
solid-as-a-rock Cairn chin,
doesn't she?
JOE:
You can tell she's salt of the earth.
You can just tell.
So, sis... how is everything?
Fine, how are you?
I'm fine, how are you feeling?
I'm feeling fine.
I'm good... I am.
Neddy, I'm good, I'm great even.
No blues? No blahs?
Nope.
'Cause I have some exquisite
medication I can get you.
(laughs):
No, it's nothing like last time.
Nothing.
Good.
(playing grows louder)
ABBY:
Joshua.
a little intermission?
Hmm?
I wonder how many rats
live in this building?
Joshua.
I'm guessing at least a hundred.
Joshua!
Do you think we can keep
it quiet for the baby?
(muffled hammering)
HAZEL:
What's that?
That's, uh...
that's gut renovation
on the penthouse.
JOE:
How charming.
You baptizing this one?
Oh, well, you know, since we
didn't baptize Joshua, we're...
ABBY:
Yeah, I think it's time for Lily's nap.
So that's a no to baptism?
BRAD:
Uh, I think, you know, we're going to let
our kids make up their
own minds about religion.
Hey, why don't we all
ABBY:
Good idea.
NED:
Come on, everybody.
- Come on.
- All right.
BRAD:
It's going to be okay.
It's okay, Ma.
- (single note plays on piano)
- (baby fussing)
- (playing piano)
- # Twinkle, twinkle, little star #
# How I wonder what you are #
# Up above the world so high #
# Like a diamond in the sky #
# Twinkle, twinkle...#
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my Lord.
Sorry. I'm sorry.
(Joshua retching)
BRAD:
You feeling better?
What's going on over here?
Did you feed Nero today?
Yeah?
Dad?
Yeah.
I don't like soccer.
I-I thought I did,
and I wanted to...
but I don't.
Oh...
Well, you know, that's...
that's okay, you know?
I don't like baseball either.
Well, that's all right.
You ch... you do something else.
You can do whatever you want.
You know?
Do you ever feel weird, Dad?
Weird?
Yeah, yeah, sometimes.
Like if I don't exercise
for a while
or wake up in the middle
of a dream...
or have too much
coffee or something.
Do you ever feel weird about me?
(laughs softly)
Your weird son?
No.
No, no, no, no, not at all.
Not at all.
You know that magic trick
where the magician puts
the person in the box
and spins the box
and makes the person disappear?
Yeah?
I know how that trick is done.
If you look carefully, you can tell.
Well, you know, hey,
maybe magic is your thing.
We could take you to a magic store.
Get you some tricks.
You know, you don't have to love me.
That's not like a rule or something.
But I do love you.
You're my son. You're my boy.
I'll always love you,
no matter what.
Okay?
(static clicking softly)
(low breathy sound over monitor)
Brad.
BRAD:
Mm?
Brad.
Hmm?
Do you hear that?
Hmm? What?
I think there's someone
in the baby's room.
(static clicking softly)
No, that's static, sweetie.
No, there's someone in Lily's room.
Abby, wait a second.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Sweetie?
Abby.
Damn it.
She's breathing, right?
She's fine, sweetie.
She's fine.
I thought she was choking
or something.
It's amazing how tiny they are.
ABBY:
It's almost heartbreaking.
(piano music begins playing
classical piece)
(piano continues playing)
(baby cooing)
Hey, did you walk the dog?
Okay, let's roll, little man.
(mumbles)
(baby fussing)
Oh.
Oh, don't cry.
(piano continues playing)
Um, yeah, put it on the...
put it on the desk.
All right, thanks a lot.
Listen, hey, I'm running late.
I got to... Okay.
Hey, buddy.
How you doing?
High five. Down low.
Two. Hey, hey, come on.
You all right?
Okay.
I'll see you later.
Hey!
(continues playing
classical piece)
Did you solve them all already?
(piano continues playing)
And ten million's the minimum
for this particular fund.
Of course... of course
we would love your support,
but ten is the number.
It's not six.
(mumbles)
(whispers)
Yeah.
(piano continues playing)
(slide projector clicks)
WOMAN:
Okay, now let's
take a moment talking
about how and why
these ancient people
embalmed their dead.
BOY:
Mummies?
Yes, mummies.
(laughs)
Oh, you're like a bird
trapped in a garage.
Yeah. That's...
Come on.
Serve.
(whistle blows)
(piano continues playing)
(piano continues playing)
(door opening)
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"Joshua" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/joshua_11399>.
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