Joy Ride: Dead Ahead

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Will that be all for you?

There you go.

Have a good night.

Where are you going?

Come on. Party time, huh?

Hey!

Hey, wait up!

Looking for company?

It's pretty shitty

out there, huh?

Hoo.

I like the rain.

Keeps everybody inside...

and washes everything clean.

Yeah, sure. Whatever.

So, anyway,

it's 75 for a straight f***...

And 25 for a pump and run.

Show me what you got.

Where you haulin'?

Heading home.

- Lucky you.

- The wig too.

So we gonna get started

here or what?

Get it wet for me.

- Are you kiddin'?

- Do it.

Now!

You know what?

Screw this.

What the f***!

You want out?

There's your exit.

You're a f***ing freak.

Somebody help me!

Oh, my God, Kaylal

Oh, my God, look outl

- Oh, my God!

-

- Oh, my God.

- Oh! Why? Why?

- Are you kidding? Not funny.

- I don't wanna die.

-

- Oh, my God.

I'm sorry, baby.

She made me.

Mel, I did not make you.

That was totally your idea.

That's the quality time you guys want to

spend together? To kill me in my sleep?

You should wait and see

what we have in store for Vegas.

- You know what I'm gonna do?

- What?

I'm gonna go into a dark corner,

and I'm gonna gamble by myself...

while you guys go do the

whole bachelor/bachelorette thing.

Don't be such a baby.

We agreed to do the parties together...

so everyone would have

an equal opportunity to torture us.

Hey, chill. Chill!

I don't want you staining

the fine Corinthian leather.

What a waste

of fine Corinthian.

You dare mock the '83 Chevy

Caprice wagon?

Yes, I do. Question:

Why did we not fly to Vegas?

Because Kay and I haven't seen

each other since Christmas...

and I miss my little sister.

I miss you too, Sis.

Congratulations, Kay.

- You've found a genuine ghost town.

-

Okay, is this place even open?

- Fill her up, ma'am?

- Sure.

He's kind of cute. No?

No. No.

You know, ma'am, here

at Inbred Jed's, we require

that you pay in advance.

- Really?

- Really.

- Uh-

- Okay.

What the-

Uh-

- Psych.

-

Okay.

-

- Hey, whoa. Hey, whoa!

Hey, hey, hey.

What the hell is going on?

Nik, this is my sister, Mel,

and her fiance, Bobby.

You are way hotter

in person.

Wait a minute. Is this

the guy you've been talking

to on MySpace?

33, 628 friends and counting...

and Kayla is number one.

- You're my number one.

- Okay. All right. What's happening?

What's going on?

Nik's gonna be my date

in Vegas.

- He took a bus all the way

from Salt Lake City to meet me.

- Okay.

C-Could you please

join me in the bathroom?

Okay.

- Are you kidding me?

- Look, I know Brad's gonna be there tomorrow.

And I haven't seen him since we broke up.

I just wanted to show up with somebody.

But you barely know this guy.

I barely know you since

you moved away to be with Bobby.

Which one's yours again?

I jest.

I don't understand anything you said.

You have two things right here.

Nik and I have been talking on the phone

every day for the past five months.

- Yeah, online.

- Online, on the phone, over webcam.

He's not a serial killer. Trust me,

I googled his name and everything.

Do you need the change?

- Come on. Come on.

- There you go.

Check this out.

This road would be a lot faster.

No traffic, no cops.

Free at last.

No hassle from the man.

Look, I didn't tell you because I knew

you'd try to talk me out of it.

Yeah, exactly. Why do I always have to

be the voice of reason with you?

Come on, Sis.

Please? Pretty please?

I just want

to have some fun.

Fine, but you have to promise

to feed him, water him...

- and clean up after him.

- I will, I promise.

Uh, I'm not really a back roads

type of guy, buddy.

Uh, they built the highways

for a reason. Stick to 'em.

Yeah, to slow sh*t down, man.

Think about it. The faster we get to Vegas,

the faster we start cashing in...

- the faster we start having fun.

- Come on, Bobby.

- Come on.

- Let's go.

We're going to Vegas!

We've been driving over an hour and

we haven't even seen the main highway yet.

That's because we're running exactly

parallel to it, sweetheart.

It's simple physics. Relax.

We're fine as long

as we keep heading west.

Oh, would you look at this.

A dirt road.

Yeah, this has to mean

civilization is close, right?

Or is this the main entrance to Vegas, Nik?

'Cause I don't know. I've never been.

Quit busting my balls, man.

It was your map.

What the f*** is that smell?

- Oh, no.

- Oh, sh*t!

- Pull the car over.

- What's wrong with it?

- Anywhere, pull over. Pull it over.

- I am.

Okay.

Geez, just stop the car. Stop the car.

- Thank you.

- What are we gonna do?

What is it?

- The engine seized.

-

Did you ever think- Did you ever think

maybe you should put some oil in there?

I don't know about that stuff.

She had a good run. Isn't this Grammy's car?

- Yeah.

- Well, I'll miss her.

Aw, that's sad. I feel like

we should bury it or something.

Can you hear me?

Can you hear me now?

Can you hear me now?

No sh*t.

Which way do you think?

Well, we know nothing's down

there for a hundred miles, so-

I say we keep going down

this way.

- Straight to Vegas, right, Nik?

- Right, Nik.

- Right, Bobby.

- A**hole.

Okay, guys.

- We're in hell.

- At least that means

we're not completely lost.

You may want to surrender your Goth pride,

Nik, and lose the black jacket.

I'm not Goth, jock. Third-wave emo punk,

if you insist on using labels.

Well, it's first-wave jackass

to wear black in the desert.

- Tell that to the bedouins.

- I will.

Wait a minute. What's that?

Sweet.

What are we gonna do?

Bust right in, or what?

Looks like our luck's changing.

See you're good for something, jock.

Holy sh*t!

This mail's over a month old.

Anyone home?

- Hello!

- Hello!

Hello! Anyone home?

Hello.

-

- Still got nothing.

Nik?

Nik!

-

- Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

What is it?

What?

Oh, I'm sorry.

These are a b*tch to open sometimes.

- You think they'd fix that.

- We just busted down a door and broke a window.

What do you want to do next?

Set this place on fire?

Where are you going?

This place is empty.

Whoever lived here before hasn't lived here

for a long time. Bobby? Bobby?

- You scared the sh*t out of us.

- I'm sorry, baby.

Oh, gross.

These expired, like, a year ago.

Scooby snack?

Like Scooby Doo?

I thought you said therapy

helped your sister's control issues.

I told you that because I thought

you'd never meet her.

I don't see what the big deal

is. I think it's kind of sexy.

I'll show you sexy... later.

Later, later, later.

- Later, later, later.

- Creepy.

- All the phones are dead.

- Everything's dead here.

You know, this place has got to be one of those

weekend retreat slash meth-lab combo deals...

or something,

because this is pathetic.

- We should get out ofhere before sunset.

- I think we should go.

Check this out.

Wow, talk about valley of death.

Nice piece of real estate.

You know what they say.

Location, location, location.

Bobby, don't go any closer.

Don't worry.

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