Juno Page #22

JUNO:

Forget it, Bleek. Take Katrina the

Douche Packer to the prom. I'm sure

you guys will have a really bitchin'

time!

BLEEKER:

(searching for a

comeback)

Yeah, well... I still have your

underwear.

JUNO:

I still have your virginity!

BLEEKER:

(looking around,

panicked)

Oh my God, SHUT UP!

JUNO:

What? Are you ashamed that we did

it?

BLEEKER:

No...

JUNO:

Well at least you don't have to walk

around with the evidence under your

sweater. I'm a planet!

Juno picks up her BACKPACK dejectedly and slides it over her

shoulder. She's about to walk away, when...

BLEEKER:

Wait, let me take that.

JUNO:

Huh?

BLEEKER:

You shouldn't be carrying that heavy

bag. I'll take it.

JUNO:

Oh. It's fine. What's another ten

pounds?

She turns around, wipes TEARS off her cheek (making sure no

one sees) and continues down the hallway.

EXT. MACGUFF HOUSE - PREVIA - DAY

Juno climbs ungracefully into the van. She starts the engine,

then pauses to dig through her backpack for something. She

produces a brush and begins brushing her hair in the rearview

mirror, examining herself self-consciously. She puts on some

Dr. Pepper Lip Smacker and backs out of the driveway.

INT. LORING HOUSE - MARK'S SPECIAL ROOM - DAY

Mark is seated at the computer, surfing a horror movie

website. He has the blank expression of a bored obsessive.

The doorbell rings.

INT. LORING HOUSE - ENTRY - DAY

Mark opens the door. Juno stands there, looking radiantly

knocked-up. She holds a stack of CDs. Mark breaks into a

grin.

MARK:

Wow. That shirt is working hard.

JUNO:

(furtive)

Is Vanessa here?

MARK:

Nope. We're safe.

He and Juno smile conspiratorially.

JUNO:

Cool.

MARK:

Come on, I have something for you.

He gestures for Juno to follow him into the house.

INT. LORING HOUSE - BASEMENT - AFTERNOON

The Lorings' basement is dank, cluttered unfinished and

unattractive, much like Paulie Bleeker's. Mark pulls a chain

to illuminate a bare bulb.

JUNO:

Oh, Mark! Is this the baby's room?

It's beautiful!

MARK:

Hilarious. No, I just keep all of my

old comics down here, and I want to

show you one of them.

JUNO:

Oh God, you're one of those guys...

MARK:

You're gonna like this, I promise.

Mark RUMMAGES through a cardboard box in the corner.

MARK:

(extracting a bagged

COMIC from the box)

Here it is.

He shows the COMIC to Juno. It's called "Most Fruitful Yuki."

It depicts a pregnant JAPANESE GIRL kicking ass and taking

names.

JUNO:

"Most Fruitful Yuki"? What is... Oh

my god, she's a pregnant superhero!

MARK:

Isn't that great? I got it when I

was in Japan with my band. She reminds

me of you.

Juno examines the comic. "Most Fruitful Yuki" does resemble

her.

JUNO:

Wow, I actually feel like less of a

fat dork now.

MARK:

Most Fruitful Yuki is bad ass, man.

You should be proud to be the same

condition.

She throws a KARATE KICK in Mark's direction with a KEE-YA!

Juno is sincerely pleased.

JUNO:

Okay, how about some tunes?

There's a battered portable CD player in the corner. Juno

kneels down and pops in one of the discs.

JUNO:

Now this first one is kinda slow.

But it's Mott the Hoople so it's

still totally rad and hardcore.

Juno puts in the CD and "All The Young Dudes" fills the room.

Mark Laughs.

JUNO:

What?

MARK:

I actually know this one.

JUNO:

You do?

MARK:

Yeah, this song's older than me, if

you can believe that. I danced to it

at my senior prom.

JUNO:

That's almost interesting, Mark. Who

did you dance with?

Rate this script:3.8 / 6 votes