Jury Duty Page #2

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Bob, is that you?

Who's this?

I don't know who he is.

Bobby Trenton?

You know the defendant?

Know him?

We cheated our way through

high school together,

didn't we, Bobby?

Remember we had that thing

with the hands, right here.

Then when we put

the thing on the...

And you slammed...

It hurt your right there.

Excused.

This trial should

move quite swiftly.

Dr. Maurice Gaines,

an orthopedic surgeon

has been accused

of malpractice.

Murderer!

I don't know.

I mean, call me crazy,

but I believe

a man has the right

to protect his family.

Say hello to Manson for me.

Ee-eee-eee!

You're out of order!

No, you're out of order!

This whole court

is out of order!

BAILIFF:

Bring him in.

(SNARLING)

JUDGE:

Order! Order!

The defendant,

Carl Wayne Bishop

is accused of

multiple counts of murder.

This trial will be a very long

and involved one.

If you are selected

as a juror,

you will be

sequestered in a hotel.

Unfortunately,

your lives will be disrupted.

Your relationships and jobs

will have to be put on hold.

It will be a true test

of your commitment

to our judicial system.

Mr. Collins,

do you have any

preconceived notions

about the Drive-Thru Killer?

Drive-Thru who?

Don't tell me

you've never heard

of Carl Wayne Bishop?

No, I can't say I have.

I'm not one for television.

Poisons the mind.

It's too biased.

Nobody tells the truth.

And quite frankly,

the truth,

well, that's all

I'm interested in.

They picked a jury!

They picked a jury!

They're serving

tuna salad for lunch!

Tuna salad for lunch!

(REPORTER TALKING IN FRENCH)

(REPORTER TALKING IN JAPANESE)

(REPORTER TALKING IN SPANISH)

The jury for

this highly-charged

and sensitive murder trial

has been chosen.

Presently, the jurors

are departing the courthouse

for an undisclosed location.

REPORTER 1:

Sir, over here! Do you know

where they are taking you?

REPORTER 2:

Will you be allowed

to see your families?

REPORTER 3:

Did you try the tuna salad?

Fear not, citizens.

Justice will be served.

You're in good hands! Aah!

Ow!

What? I had the exact change.

Sit down.

Okay.

(CLUCKS)

Breaker, 1-2.

Breaker, 1-2.

Good afternoon,

ladies and gentlemen,

and welcome to Justice Tours!

(LAUGHS)

I'm Juror Number 6.

Number 6, sit down!

Do we have any jurors

from out of town?

Great. Would you like

to tell us something

about yourself?

My name is Jorge,

and I received

my citizenship here

in this great country,

one month ago!

I am so proud to be here.

And you can even

drink our water.

(LAUGHS)

Number 6, sit down!

Shh!

You guys, everybody stay calm.

I've just been informed

there's a bomb on the bus.

It's set to go off

if we exceed the speed

of 10 miles an hour.

Sit down!

(LAUGHS)

(BRAKES SCREECHING)

Aah! Ow.

(SQUEAKING)

(THUDDING)

All right,

ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to your hotel.

When you're not here,

you'll be in the courtroom.

When not in the courtroom,

you'll be here.

Please do not

discuss any aspect

of the trial with each other

or anyone else.

That means friends,

family, the media.

TOMMY:
What about

Ricki Lake? (LAUGHS)

Welcome to

the Holiday Suites Hotel,

where every day is a holiday.

Eh, pretty nice joint

you got here.

JORGE:

Beautiful, beautiful.

Actually, you'll be staying

in the historic wing.

(MACHINES WHIRRING)

The emergency exits

are at the end

of the hallways.

And the ice machine is located

just across the street

at the gas station.

You'll be staying

two to a vintage suite.

Jurors 7 and 12,

in suite 503.

I'm 12.

I'm 7.

And, let's see,

we have jurors 2 and 9

in suite 504.

What are you doing?

We're bunkies, see?

9?

Move it, pervert.

Good night.

Wait, wait. No, no, no.

Don't shut it. Don't shut it.

Ahh!

(DRILL BUZZING)

Peanut, look. Huh?

We just died

and went to heaven.

Oh, my.

Oh, look.

Oh!

Peanut-size shampoos.

All these fun things

for me in here.

Two-ply.

(MAN CLEARING THROAT)

Oh, my God!

Something wrong, son?

Principal Beasely.

Good grief.

Mr. Collins?

In a suit and tie?

I didn't do it!

I didn't do it!

Still hanging out

in the boys' room, I see.

Sit down, Collins!

If this isn't one of

life's supreme ironies.

Didn't I expel you?

Twice.

I thought so.

What is it, son?

May I be excused?

Very well.

Oh, pleasant dreams,

Mr. Collins.

I know that's

what you majored in.

(CLEARING THROAT)

(SNORING)

MAN ON TAPE:

I can accomplish my goals.

I have a winner inside me.

Wait here, Peanut.

I am no one's doormat.

If I believe,

others will believe.

I will accomplish my goals.

I have a winner inside me.

I am no one's...

TOMMY:
Principal Beasely,

open up!

I can't sleep with

that self-help crap tape!

I...

Quick, sir! Jamie Cooly's

smoking in the boys' room.

Lundy's playing

with his boner in

the back of the class.

I am no one's doormat.

If I believe,

others will believe.

I can accomplish my goals.

(DOG WHIMPERING)

Oh, every day

isn't a holiday.

Every day's detention.

Ahh!

I can't sleep.

I'm gonna have

bags under my eyes.

...others will believe.

I can accomplish...

If I believe,

others will believe.

I am no one's doormat.

All rise.

Department Number 52

of the Superior Court

is now in session.

The Honorable Judge

Edward J. Powell

presiding.

Ladies and

gentlemen of the jury,

here are the facts.

Seven innocent men dead.

Seven families destroyed.

Seven lives wasted.

All courtesy of

Mr. Carl Wayne Bishop

and a stun gun, Model 350-X.

As the case unfolds,

we will show

Carl Wayne Bishop

to be in possession

not only of a stun gun,

but also a lethal

red-hot temper.

We will show that because

of his employment record,

getting a job

became as difficult

as holding a job.

And as a consequence,

Mr. Bishop ended up

on the streets.

And finally,

we will show

that Carl Wayne Bishop

was found living

in a boarded-up,

condemned shack,

with a stun gun

and the bodies of

seven fast-food managers

buried in the floorboards.

(WHIMPERING)

The Defense will contend

that Mr. Bishop was set up.

That he was merely

a harmless drifter

who happened to be

in the wrong place

at the wrong time.

Who never actually lived

in the condemned house

but was there for

a job interview.

At 9:
30 at night?

In the worst neighborhood

in town?

Please.

The Defense can

contend all it wants,

but the evidence will show

Mr. Bishop to be

a calculating,

cold,

killing machine,

who knew

exactly where he was

and what he was doing.

(PEOPLE GASPING)

All rise!

Moron.

(SIGHING)

Thanks for

saving me a seat.

(SIGHING)

So, what do you think?

About what?

Your sleeping

or your drooling?

We all have our own ways

of concentrating.

Honestly,

do you think

the guy did it?

I don't think

we're allowed to discuss that.

Then what can we discuss?

Us?

Uh-huh.

Nothing.

Whoa, boy, ease up.

You're like

a fly swimming in

a barrel of pickles.

You got to

cut wood before

you can shave its bark.

Think about it.

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