Just Go With It Page #2

So, you fell down the stairs, huh?

Yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

Did you trip over something?

Was there a skateboard there, or...

No, I was distracted by something.

What distracted you?

A girl.

A girl, okay. Was it your mother?

No!

'Cause she just looks good.

That's your stepmom. I can talk like that.

All right. This is lidocaine. Don't think about it.

Ow!

Don't think about it. Think about your face.

Good, good.

Blonde, brunette, redhead?

Blonde, tan, tall, rocking body.

Nipples.

Want me to numb something else for you?

You're getting a little nutty over there.

No! No, I'm good. I'm good.

I'm alive! I'm alive, everybody!

Good job, Doctor. That was really nice.

The distraction, I'm guessing.

The what?

The boy was distracted. That's why he fell.

So, I'm taking the rap for this.

Yes. Your hotness basically pushed

him down the stairs.

Good luck proving that in court, Wisengruber.

Wisengruber? Is that what they're saying

on the Gossip Girl nowadays?

I knew you two would eventually find each other!

But be careful, Palmer, these plastic surgeons,

they really know how to operate.

Yeah, all right, Adon. All right.

I just don't know about plastic surgery.

I mean, doesn't it always look so fake?

Depends who's doing it. I'm pretty

good at it. I'm telling you.

Some of my patients are here tonight. Oh, really?

Really, really. Look around,

see if you can find someone decent-looking.

How 'bout her?

The lady from Saw?

Fine. Who did you do?

All right. I hate to rat the guy out,

but see that guy over there?

You mean Sexy Ass?

Before I met him, he was No Buns Bobby.

Really?

His back went straight to his legs. No kidding.

He'd go to the bathroom,

he'd slide right in the toilet.

I know, I know, that's really romantic, isn't it?

So, North Carolina, how long

have you lived here in LA?

I've been here almost two years.

Uh-huh. That's a lot of auditioning for you.

You think I'm an actress?

I guarantee you're an actress.

Well, guess again, Doc. I teach sixth grade math.

They got no schools in North Carolina to teach at?

My parents divorced.

Had a pretty nasty one, actually,

when I was in the eighth grade. Mmm-hmm.

And... I don't know. I got tired of picking sides, so...

Okay. I thought I'd make a change

and, yeah, move out to LA.

You came to the right place.

No one gets divorced in LA.

Mmm-hmm.

I've never hung out with a girl your age. This is nice.

Oh, no. Your first lie to me.

You're good. All right.

I've never hung out with a girl your age and

connected the way we are right now.

Actually, I've never connected with,

I don't think any girl at any age.

See? I can tell when you're lying

and when you're telling the truth. Oh.

Yeah. The second thing I said was the truth.

I know.

Oh, my God. That was the greatest night of my life.

Yeah. This feels like it could be...

I don't know, a real thing.

It's a thing all right, Palmer.

Well, I have to get to work,

but how 'bout I take your number

and then you can take me out

on a proper date next time?

I got a business card in my pocket

if you wanna get that.

You better call.

You better not just, just leave me hanging.

I'd get it for you myself,

but I don't want you to see me naked in the daylight.

It could be a deal breaker.

What's this?

A circle?

A wedding ring? You're married?

No, no, no, I'm not, I'm not married.

That is a... That is... That's not mine.

Whose wedding ring is in your pants, Danny?

All right, listen, just give me a minute to explain this.

Please.

It's gonna take more than a minute.

I am such an idiot!

No, no, no, no, no.

Don't call me!

No, Palmer!

I told you that this whole fake marriage thing

was just gonna come and bite you in the ass.

Why don't you just tell her the truth?

You think I can tell her the truth?

Let me practice. You be her right now.

Oh, good. Okay, hold on.

Okay. She's not like that, but anyways.

Um, I wear this fake wedding ring sometimes...

You're a pig.

Sorry. You're a pig.

What's wrong? You're walking really weird.

My back. I slept on the beach last night.

God Almighty.

When are you gonna strengthen your spine?

Seriously, Flomax.

You gotta work out more than once a month.

I can't, I don't have time to work out.

You do. You can't say that, Danny.

My mother always said Cary Grant

never went to the gym.

Only took the stairs, every day, never an elevator.

You wanna hear my impression

of Cary Grant's butler? Nuh-uh.

Watch. What?

Hello? No, he's dead.

Okay, bye-bye.

That's good. That's funny.

Mom, give me some money.

Hi. How are you?

Nice to see you, kids.

Please be polite and say hello to Dr. Maccabee.

'Ello, Dr. Danny.

'Ow is you today?

Is that my associate, Dr. Doolittle?

Why is she talking like that?

She's been working on some accents.

I am takin' an acting class this summer, I is.

Gonna be the next Miley Cyrus, I am.

How 'bout you, young man? Do

you like Hannah Montana?

No. I like Californication.

When do you ever watch Californication?

Rosa lets us watch Showtime

when she calls her boyfriend.

Eat the mushroom! Eat the mushroom! Yes!

Mmm. You run a tight ship at home, huh?

Dr. Danny?

Yeah?

Will you take me to Hawaii so

I can swim with the dolphins?

Take you to Hawaii? No.

I saw a show on the Discovery Channel.

They say in Hawaii they have dolphins

that you can swim with if you pay money.

Okay.

But I don't have any money. And

my mom says you're rich.

Michael! No, it's fine.

Maybe you should make your own money.

Maybe a paper route or something like that?

'Cause rich people don't give other people trips.

That's why they remain rich. You understand?

But my mom says you do charity for kids all the time.

I do charity work like I fix a cleft

lip or a child's deformity.

I don't take them to Hawaii.

I could get arrested for that.

What if I was deformed? Then

would you take me to Hawaii?

If you were deformed, I'd bring you to Hawaii,

but I'd leave you there, 'cause

I wouldn't want to look at you.

Okay. Here's the money, and I want change.

And I wanna hear back

that you actually ate the food that I am paying for.

Mom, before we go, can I make a Devlin?

Sure. Down the hall. Will you please go with him?

We open in five minutes and I am

not having him sit there forever.

Bloody hell right, I will, Mumsy!

All right, Winston Churchill.

He said, "I gotta make a Devlin."

What does that mean? Uh...

It's just a friend of mine who

was in my sorority in college

named Devlin Adams, and...

Well, I wouldn't say friend. I'd say more my nemesis.

Oh, so she was a frenemy? Yes.

You'd probably like her. She's really, really fake.

Ah.

Always had to have the coolest clothes

and the hottest boys and, you know...

She bothers you. A lot.

So, one night, I was just having a glass of wine.

A bottle. A bottle.

And, uh...

And I just got so tired of the kids saying things like,

"I gotta take a crap.

"I gotta take a dump."

So, I told them that it was called "making a Devlin,"

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