Killer Klowns from Outer Space Page #2

European circus fantastique.

Hurry, hurry.

Step rig ht UP

See the circus bizarro.

Come one, come all.

Step right up, little lady.

Don't be shy. Don't be stupid.

Come see the incredible

Miss 50-50--

half man, half woman--

the perfect double date.

Oh, yeah.

That's right, little lady.

Step right up here

and see Gumbo,

the toothless elephant.

Or right over here,

we've got Belinda,

the bulimic wonder.

Watch her binge and purge

before your very eyes. Ha!

Mike, keep it down.

Somebody will catch us.

God, is this place great or what?

I mean, it looks like

it was decorated

by Clowns "R" Us.

I don't know.

So, how much further

you want to go?

Well...

Well, let's just go down

to the end of this hall

where those doors are.

Come on.

This is no funhouse.

No circus, either.

What?

I can't believe it.

What is it,

a nuclear power plant?

No.

A missile silo?

No.

A military base?

No! No!

The shooting star.

What are you talking about?

The shooting star

we went to go look for--

we are in it.

What was that?

I don't know...

...but it's coming this way.

Here. Come on.

Look at this place.

It smells like candy.

You know, I don't know

what we saw out there before, but...

this looks like

a cotton candy factory to me.

Yeah.

This must be where

they hang it up to dry

before they ship the stuff out.

No, it's not.

I've never seen anything

like this before, have you?

No.

Well, that's because nobody has.

I don't believe in UFOs,

but if they do exist,

then-- then we're trapped

in one right now.

Debbie, will you just calm down?

There's got to be a logical

explanation for this.

This isn't what you think it is.

Nobody stores

cotton candy like this.

What are you talking about?

Of course it is.

Look.

Joe Lombardo.

Down this way.

Are you OK?

I think so.

Come on.

Popcorn? Why popcorn?

Because they're clowns,

that's why.

Mike, get me out of here!

Hurry, they're coming!

We have to tell the police.

We're going to run to the police

and tell them there's

a bunch of clowns

running around killing

people with cotton candy?

I have a friend there.

I know he'll believe us.

I don't know, Debbie.

I wouldn't even believe us.

What the heck?

Dave!

Oh, my God!

Something horrible has happened!

Somebody's been killed!

Wait a second, Debbie.

What happened?

You got to help us!

We got to do something!

There are two people dead!

- Who, Debbie? Who's dead?

- Joe Lombardo. He's dead.

And-- and some old man, too.

Wait a second, guys.

Are you sure about this?

Yes! it-- they were hanging there

wrapped up

in these cotton candy things--

these... cocoons.

Cocoons?

Yes, cocoons.

You know, cocoons.

All right, everybody calm down.

Look, Debbie, come inside

and explain this to me.

I'd like to help you,

but before I can,

I've got to understand

what's going on here myself.

I really need

to get some mascara, OK?

OK, why don't

we just go to the drugstore?

OK? And then we'll go on.

Look.

Cute.

All right, sit down.

Let's start from the beginning,

all right?

OK, OK.

We were up

at the Top of the World,

and-- and we saw

this shooting star,

and we decided to go look for it.

But instead of finding

the shooting star,

we saw this-- this circus tent.

And that's when we went inside,

and that's when

we saw all those people

in those-- those pink

cotton candy cocoons.

Dave, it was not a circus tent.

It was something else.

- What? What?

- It was a spaceship,

and there was these things,

these... killer clowns,

and they shot popcorn at us.

We barely got away.

Killer clowns from outer space?

Holy sh*t.

Dave, we are telling you the truth.

You've got to believe us.

Let me tell you something, honey.

I was just over there.

There's nothing going on.

Excuse me, please,

but we're talking to Dave.

Now, just hold on a second, Mooney.

They say some people are dead.

Let's hear them out.

All right, Dave.

OK.

Clowns, cotton candy,

flying popcorn.

Go ahead. Let them make fools out

of the police department.

I told you,

I was just over there!

You going to believe

this little tramp?

Come on, Mooney!

I'm handling this, all right?

All right, all right, Debbie,

who's your friend?

Mike. We go to school together.

You two were up

at Top of the World together?

Yeah.

I know you, you little fart.

You hang out

with the Terenzi brothers.

Clowns? I get it.

Another one of their stupid stunts

to sell ice cream

from that goddamn truck

those hoodlums run around in.

Well, now I really believe this.

Well, you better go now, Dave,

before the clowns take over, huh?

And when you get back

from saving the world,

I want a full written report

so I can give it to the chief

when he gets back on Monday.

Look, everything happened

just the way we said.

We are telling you the truth.

All right, all right.

You two come with me.

Come on.

Hurry up, Dave.

Don't let them get away.

Go ahead, Dave...

...make a dummy out of yourself.

But you're not going

to make a dummy out of me.

You, in the back.

Uh... Oh... Um...

Whoa! Oh...

Excuse me.

Oh. Oh, my.

Ma)' I help you?

Oh, no!

Oh, no.

All right, we're going up there

to check this out.

First, I'm taking you home, Debbie.

No way.

I'm going back up there with you.

You can't tell me what to do.

Debbie, just listen to me, would you?

I don't have to listen to you.

You are not my boyfriend

anymore, all right?

Yeah, that's right.

I'm not your boyfriend anymore.

That doesn't change the way

I feel about you, though.

Dave, please.

Don't do this to me.

All right, Debbie,

you got a choice.

Either go home,

or I'm going to take you

back to the station and lock you up

for safekeeping. How's that?

Oh.

Pizza.

Uh-huh.

Oh! For me?

Oh!

Oh, Jim... is this from you?

- On!

Look, Debbie...

May I please speak

to Mike outside?

Fine. Sure.

Thank you.

Your old boyfriend?

This is great.

Will you come here?

He's probably going

to take me up on top of the hill

and shoot me.

Look, don't worry about Dave.

It's those clowns

you got to worry about.

Listen, as soon as you guys leave here,

I'm going to follow

you guys up there.

You're going

to follow us up there?

Debbie, I don't even

want to go up there.

Listen, you stay

inside the house

and keep the door locked.

I'll be back here in a little bit

to check on you.

OK?

You better.

That's good timing.

Ooh!

Oh!

Wait a minute.

Where is it?

Yeah, that's what

I'd like to know, pal.

It was right there

where that hole is.

So are you saying that hole

is where the tent was?

The tent made that hole--

is that what you're telling me?

Yes! It was there.

Look, we saw it.

That's a fact.

I'll tell you what

the facts are, mister.

You said people are being killed.

Now, where are the bodies?

I don't know.

I saw Joe Lombardo dead.

I can only tell you

what I think I saw.

Oh, so now you just

think you saw?

No! I know what I saw.

I just can't prove it.

My proof is gone.

Yeah, right.

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