Last Days Here Page #6

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It would be really cool

to go into the studio with Bobby

and do a real album

for the first time

rerecord some old stuff

write some new stuff

'Cause I'm proud of that stuff

And if 30 years later

people are finally discovering

that music

and you know posting things

online about

"Oh this band is so amazing

This drummer kicks ass"

and stuff like that

When I read stuff like that

it's like "Wow really?

Thank you"

On the other hand everyone who

tries to do this with Bobby

winds up getting crapped on

It winds up being a disaster

of mega proportions

because Bobby will do something

to screw it up

I don't want to go do something

that's a high publicity thing

and have it fall apart

and be a laughingstock

I don't want to do it

- She hasn't called me

You know

got 1 7 minutes left

I can't==

my phone's gonna run out

I got

- Your call cannot be

completed

- My call can't be completed

as dialed

Come on please answer

honey

The thing that people

don't realize

is that Mr Evil==

whoo!

Pentagram dih-dih-dih-dih

yadda yadda yadda

Man under this shell

and this put-on

all I want to do is eat

take care of my loving

other half

in a bed that's comfortable

next to a warm soul

that I can give my soul to

because I'm not a bad guy

I'm really not a bad guy

underneath

I don't mean to do the things

I do wrong

You know I pray every night

to God

to forgive me for the things

I've done wrong

Hallie why are you

calling me an a**hole

and saying that I hurt you?

- Because you did

- All I called to==

Listen all I said==

Can I say anything?

Can I say anything ever?

- It was just overkill

Hallie Hallie

Hallie Hallie

And you know it's great to be

in a relationship

but you just need

a f***ing break

He was talking about marriage

I mean from the get-go

the first thing Bobby told me

was

"I have a new girlfriend

and I'm gonna marry her"

And it's just all these things

like compounded

on this poor girl

and she's just bound to break

- Yeah well not dealing==

You said it

I didn't

She hung up on me again

[somber music]

It's over

There's nothing to live for

[phone line trilling]

- I can come over

and can listen to music dude

Music's a powerful drug

- What do you say?

- What Hallie said?

- Yeah

- No candy-coating

This isn't easy for me dude

And I don't==but I'll tell ya

I mean

Last night he didn't want

to see me

Today

he didn't want to see me

He doesn't want to see anybody

He's just really affected

He's f***ing crushed

- Now that this Hallie thing's

coming down man

I could just sense Bobby

just trying to find

any excuse to f***ing relapse

and go back and start

smoking crack

I can start feeling it happen

Bobby listen to me

It seemed like last time

we hung out

I just got a feeling that you

might have smoked crack

Did you smoke crack

since you've been here?

- No

- Philip's playing here in a

couple weeks with his band Down

He's got to be clean for that

Their hesitation

the business side of it

is giving money to

a drug addict man you know?

And he's got

to be f***ing clean

to back up me telling them

that he's clean

and is gonna be able to do it

you know?

If he shows up f***ed up

it's gonna f*** it up

[bluesy rock music]

- Being a person that has dealt

with his own demons and won

- That's the truth

- I just hope that one day

maybe he can do the same thing

you know?

It would be a beautiful thing

man

- Appreciate that

From the heart

- Wow

Can I eat anything I want?

Can I taste a piece

of pineapple?

- You sure?

- Get some

- Mmm

Well they got it all

The way it's supposed to be

- Man I got like so many

Pentagram t-shirts

It's an honor having you here

man

There's just so much respect

Personally I'm sick of hearing

people say it's too late

- Nah

- It's never too late

- Never never never

- You know there's a lot

of people you know

"Dude there's no way

he can come back"

- How many times have we been

written off?

- No I know man

- If we're gonna get straight

to the bone and sh*t

There is this wave

that I'm sure you're aware of==

young musicians that are

discovering Pentagram

That's a gift my brother

- Sure it is

- It's a f***ing gift

- Sure it is

- And it's enough of a gift

for you to give yourself

a f***ing break man

You've got your f***ing health

- I'm giving myself a break

I kicked $300 of rock

six Xanax bars

and a 1 0-pack of dope==

cold turkey

- How's that throat feel?

- Fine

- You can sing

- Oh I can sing my ass off

- Really?

Are you ready?

- Yeah well you're the man

with the money

- Well you're the man with

the f***ing record

that needs to kick f***ing ass

too

- Believe me if you've heard

all my records

I ain't done no record in my

opinion that hadn't kicked ass

- You know what?

Robert I'd be proud

to f***ing do this

I really would man

- We're coming now Phil

- Stand up

- They're on stage

- All right man

- I love you baby

- Me too buddy

- It's great great to meet you

man

- Yep I hope we can do

something brother

- Philip!

We got to go!

- Let's go brother

- Come on!

We're on the way

Have a good show bro

[cheers and applause]

[somber music]

- You know I take him up

to meet Phil Anselmo

and everything's pretty much

all set up

On the f***ing way home

instead of focusing

on the positive

he's still focusing on Hallie

So as soon as we drop him off

he literally got out of the car

thanked me all of a sudden

his eyes start to tear up

and he says he doesn't want

to go home

to an empty apartment

He's just

he's at the end

Again

- I'm in the shower!

Five minutes!

- Can we come in?

- Uh yeah you can come in

You can step over this sh*t

Just stay out of here

I'm on record

at Jefferson Hospital

of being epidemically covered

in scabies

so is everything in

the whole goddamn place

You think I'm lying?

I can prove every bit of it

- Well let's talk

You don't have to prove it

to me

Just please get ready==

- No I have to prove it

to everybody

'cause it's cocaine cocaine

cocaine cocaine!

Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh!

- [sighs]

The only thing I see here

is a f***ing syringe

- Yeah there is a syringe

There's a syringe crack pipes

all kinds of sh*t around here

I quit

A mega dose of methadone

Mega heroin

piggybacking it

Cocaine 75% or more

dropped in the course

of less than a month okay?

- I give you huge credit

for that

but there's still a 25% that's

keeping you from making music

- No it's not

- And keeping you from making

real friends that care

- Look I gave up 99 out of 1 00

I'm not Superman

What do you want me to do?

Conquer the world overnight?

You're asking too much of me

now

I'm on the verge

of a nervous breakdown

over all this drug sh*t

- You have so much talent

and you're smoking crack

on your couch

It's heartbreaking

- How much life do you think

I have left?

I think the damage is done

Far and above

[scoffs]

- New message

[phone beeps]

- Hi, Demian

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