Last Holiday Page #6

savvy people such as yourself...

operate the market.

Did you think that rates

were going up, or were you...

pessimistic about the future?

- Well, Congressman...

- Bob, please. Bob.

Well, Bob, I find that the future

is too depressing to think about.

Oh, come on, Georgia.

Miss Byrd,

what are you doing tomorrow?

I would very much like to continue this...

Well, hold on, hold on, hold on.

You see, tomorrow I've arranged

for our group to go to Moser.

Moser? What's that?

Moser! Glass. Factory.

All of us. Special tour.

That's what we're doing tomorrow.

To answer your question,

I'm going BASE-jumping, Bob.

Really, BASE-jumping?

You're kidding! Well, why?

Well, I hear it's a completely

liberating experience.

Well, at least that's what

the brochure says.

Oh, that is amazing.

Oh, come on, Matthew,

why don't we all go along and watch?

It sounds like fun! Let's do that.

That is a great idea.

Better than some glass factory.

Fine, fine, fine.

But I'm not going there to watch.

So, because it's a dam

and not a straight jump...

Yes.

...when you don't do it right,

you will catch the current...

and it will slam you

in the side of the dam.

So, we don't want that, okay?

- So, are you ready?

- Yes, I am.

- Go get them, Matthew!

- Come on!

Damn.

Okay, now we're gonna do this.

I don't know what the hell makes people

want to do something like this.

I try to avoid any plummeting sports.

Matthew's only doing it

because Georgia's doing it.

He's the most competitive person

in the world.

He may have met his match in Georgia.

Camcorder!

Oh. Bob, Bob, the camera.

You got the camera going?

- We're rolling! Go ahead!

- Okay!

Oh, oh. He's gonna... There we go.

He's going over the rail.

- Oh, my God.

- Oh, wow.

Oh, my God.

Oh, come on.

All right, here we go.

Okay. Look.

I have told you before...

we have lost a couple of people

doing this.

- What, like people died?

- Yeah.

- Sugar.

- Which one first?

Ladies first.

Ladies first. Okay.

Ready?

- Three...

- Wait, wait, wait, wait!

- Okay. All right.

- Three, two, one, go!

Perfect.

Whoa, baby!

Okay.

Three, two, one, go!

Is there a problem?

Yeah, I'd say there's a problem, Klaus.

I know a thing or two

about BASE-jumping.

I know that the canopy is supposed to

be connected to the rigging and it's not.

And that's how people get killed.

No wonder you've lost a few people.

Here I come. Watch it now!

Oh, hold it now!

I can't jump!

Canopy not connected to rigging!

- Mechanical difficulties!

- It's all right.

- I don't know why this happens!

- It's all right.

- What are you doing?

- Klaus, just shut up!

Oh, man.

- It's so...

- Disappointing.

Really?

She's the most amazing person

who ever came to this hotel.

Oh, yeah.

She lives on the edge.

She say what she wants.

She does what she wants.

True existentialist.

Hero worship, bought with a kiss

and an extravagant tip.

She's a fraud, I tell you.

Look what eating sauerkraut has done

to your heart, Frulein Gunther.

- Mr. Kragen.

- How are you?

Good.

Do me a favor. Georgia Byrd...

just find out where she's from,

what she does.

- Quietly.

- Of course, Mr. Kragen.

Prince Dominic comes tonight.

He's insisted on my venison roast.

A prince? A real prince?

They have a charity dinner in town...

where everybody gets to feel generous.

I tell you, these people are all alike.

Yes, you know, I tell you,

they are all alike.

Oh, people are not as bad as you think.

No, you're wrong, Georgia,

you're wrong. They are.

Like Kragen at the hotel

who looks for life everlasting...

in a tablespoon of extra-virgin olive oil,

you know.

You know...

you and I, we know the secret of life.

Well, what is that?

The secret of life is butter.

Butter? Don't tell nobody.

- Butter, huh?

- Butter, yes!

Three cases of crevisses.

Hotel.

- Georgia, there you are.

- We were worried you checked out.

- No, not quite yet.

- Are you gonna join us for Smokey?

- Kragen's got it all arranged.

- No, I don't think so.

I'm a little lightheaded

from all that rich food.

Come on, Georgia, you have to join us

for some gambling.

Look, I just think I want to...

Yeah, well, you look exhausted

from all the heroics.

You probably just wanna take it easy.

Oh, no, come on, Georgia.

It won't be half as much fun without you.

I don't know how much fun

it's gonna be. It's a charity event.

Oh, it'll be a great time and Georgia

can help us liven up the evening.

- It's gonna be great.

- Great time. Great time.

Great time had by all.

- Fine, fine.

- Good, it's settled then.

Smokey Robinson.

You can't miss Smokey.

Just take a little nap.

If you're reading this letter,

my disease has run its course.

Enclosed is some money for my burial.

I would like to be cremated.

Spent my whole life in a box.

I don't want to be buried in one.

Ladies and gentlemen,

because of turbulence...

the captain has turned on

the "fasten seat belt" sign.

Excuse me.

Please return to your seats

and remain seated...

with your seat belt fastened

while the sign is illuminated.

Scared of flying?

- Do I look scared to you?

- I used to be scared, too.

It helps if you color.

Georgia, whatever you got,

give me some.

Believe me, you don't want it.

Place your bets.

Don't know where to go.

I'm following you wherever you go.

That's a lunatic bet.

That's just a lunatic bet right there.

Georgia, that's a lot of money.

I know, huh?

- You always bet on black, baby.

- Yeah?

- Yes.

- All right. I'll give that a try.

- No more bets.

- Matthew, Matthew...

doing it your own way.

Georgia's our Lady Luck tonight.

Come on, 17.

Come on, 17.

- Here we go.

- There it goes.

- 17 black.

- Yeah!

- That's the ball over there.

- Where to next, lucky?

- What was that number I just played?

- 17.

Seventeen. Sounds good to me.

Isn't it a bit reckless

to bet on the same number twice?

I guess that's why they call it gambling

and not crocheting.

Gambling it is.

- Well, the house is loving you guys.

- I'm in.

- Place your bets.

- Me, too.

Here we go, here we go,

here we go. Red.

No more bets.

- Come on, show me something.

- Come on, 17.

- Come on.

- Big money, big money!

- Come on, come on, come on.

- Red, come on.

17 black!

- What?

- Yes!

Oh, my Lord!

Give me a little kickback over here.

- Thank you.

- Wow.

Mesdames et messieurs,

place your bets.

Place it, place it.

What are we doin' here?

I'm going with 17.

Georgia, you can't go there a third time.

A third time? Come on!

Come over here

and get some of this luck.

Maybe I am pushing it a little bit.

I was born on the 13th.

Thirteen, thirteen.

Put this on the thirteen.

You sure about that?

But then again,

I lost my mama when I was 11.

Good idea.

Double me up. Double me up.

Eleven. Yeah. Thank you. Eleven.

- I love my mama.

- Could you please just place the bet?

But my mama was born on the 17th.

What am I doing?

- Oh, come on, bet!

- Wherever you're going, I'm following.

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