Laura Lansing Slept Here Page #7

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I, I can't, no, no Al.

My card, in case you change your mind.

I'll be waiting.

I can't get over it.

[Melody] What.

The way you look.

Tandaleo.

We had quite an amusing afternoon.

An actor came to lunch,

quite smitten with Melody

and her women ways.

[Walter] What actor?

Uh I believe Melody calls

him the sexiest man in soaps.

Back to the dungeon.

Good night Walter Junior.

Can I ask you a question?

What is it?

Should I go up for track?

[Laura] Well, why not?

Because I'm slow.

[Laura] Get faster.

How?

Well, Walter Junior, when

I wanted to be a writer,

I wrote and I wrote and I wrote.

Your best work is habit, run, run, run.

[Walter Junior] You can

only do what you can do.

Oh that's not true, you

can do more than you can do.

That's the way it goes, the more you do,

the more you can do.

Okay.

Can you blame me?

Entertaining men at lunch.

A friend of Ms. Lansing's.

Are you jealous.

Why should I be jealous, what do I care?

You're not the only one

attractive to the opposite sex

you know.

I know.

(foreboding music)

Walter, when I was doing

the laundry the other day,

I noticed quite a smudge

of lipstick on your collar

and I scrubbed really

hard trying to get it out

because I want you to look

nice when you go to the office.

But I would like an explanation.

The train I guess.

The train?

Yes honey, the train, it's crowded,

people brush up against you.

Oh.

(calming music)

Oh Walter I forgot to tell you,

I'll need the car tomorrow,

I have to go to the periodontist.

Okay, here we go.

Now Malcom's lunch is

laid out on the table,

I won't be too long, I don't think.

You're awfully dressed

up for the periodontist.

Well I never get into

Manhattan so I thought,

oh now look, be good

and mind Auntie Laura.

Good boy, good boy, thank you.

Oh oh, no, no, no!

(baby crying)

Is it good, hmm?

(calming music)

Shall I tell you a story, Malcolm?

Once there was a little girl.

She was very bright but

she was very pretty,

but she was all alone.

And she said, when I grow up

I'm never gonna be alone again.

But she did grow up, and

she was in a dark forest,

And she was alone.

But then she met a little boy

and his name was Malcolm.

She never was alone again, was she?

Never was alone again.

Hello Laura, it's Conway Reid.

[Laura] Oh, hello Conway.

I just wanted to thank

you for a delightful lunch.

[Laura] Well I'm so glad you could come.

Me too, and thanks for Melody.

Melody.

I've never met anyone like

her, she's so different.

By the way, is Melody there,

I'd like to say hello.

I'm sorry Conway, she's

gone into Manhattan.

Oh great, I've gotta hustle,

thanks again for everything,

bye dear.

(anticipatory music)

[Woman] Service.

Hello honey it's 264,

take all my calls will you

I won't be picking up this afternoon.

Conway Reid, Conway Reid.

Ah.

(romantic music)

Melody, how exciting, come in.

I just happened to

be in the neighborhood.

Of course.

Conway Reid please.

[Woman] I'm sorry, he's not picking up.

He what?

[Woman] He's not picking up.

Are you sure?

(phone ringing)

Gomphers speaking.

Thank goodness.

I've been trying to reach

you, it's Doris Whimms,

Ms. Lansing's secretary.

I've been in a meeting.

I don't quite understand the message,

but Ms. Lansing called in some agitation

and asked me to tell you

that the periodontist

is the sexiest man in

soaps, and his address is...

Hey Francie, come, take him.

What's the matter.

[Laura] Hurry, no time for talk.

(baby crying)

(anticipatory music)

That was delicious, thank you.

There's something about smoked salmon.

Isn't there?

I wish you'd have some wine.

Oh no, I'm driving.

I can't tell you how glad I am you came.

I don't know why I did.

[Conway] Don't you?

Oh Walter, can I talk to you for a...

Excuse me.

Listen I have to go out for

a minute, and if anybody

wants me, I'll...

Ah there you, Gomphers,

you know I've just read

this proposal of yours, it

comes highly recommended

by a client, let's talk.

Come out to my office.

Mr. Baumgartner, I...

Do you know what I think?

What?

I think we should get

a little more comfortable.

Look, there's something

I want to you say.

What?

I guess I'm like every

other woman in America.

The thought of Al Lamont.

[Conway] Yes.

Lunch, alone together.

Yes.

Nothing personal Conway

but I just wish you won't...

You're saying no?

Yes.

It was wonderful meeting you.

(upbeat music)

Conway Reid?

15C.

15C, thank you.

[Melody] Ah, no.

Hah.

(door knocking)

Coming.

Laura?

Where is she?

She left.

Melody, that's her bag!

Her bag.

(tires squeaking)

Uh, uh, uh, the sexiest man in soaps?

15C.

You've been plying her with liquor!

No, no, she's driving.

What's that door?

That's the bathroom.

What's that door?

That's the bedroom but...

Be my guest.

(door knocking)

Wait, wait.

Wait a minute, who are you?

Where is she?

In the bedroom.

You!

I've got caps.

Hello Walter.

I see you two have met.

If you didn't want in here, then why did

you get me over here?

Melody is not your

cleaning woman Walter,

she's your wife, she loves you,

she'd do anything in the world for you.

We're not going up

Walter, we're going down.

All you do is meddle.

Walter I was trying

to save your marriage.

What do you know about marriage,

you couldn't even have one.

That doesn't make me Lulu the Birdgirl.

I'm just as normal as you are.

Normal, you're not normal,

you're rich and you're famous

and you make the rest of us

look like 10 cents.

If you look like 10 cents

Walter, don't blame me.

Okay, so where's my wife.

There's your wife.

(calming music)

Walter, what are you doing here.

Let's go home.

Nothing happened, I couldn't.

You're a wife, and mother.

You're a husband and a father.

Who is she?

Nobody, a girl, at the office.

I went to apartment to see her geranium.

Her what?

She has this geranium.

Okay honey, I admit I had

ulterior motives, but...

[Melody] But?

But she had one room

and three roommates.

One was frying an egg,

one was washing her hair

and one was doing his push-ups.

Yes?

It's the new world.

All I got for my trouble

was a good night kiss,

she didn't even hit my

face, she hit my collar.

She was looking at the geranium.

(frolicking music)

(laughing)

Honey...

I'm sorry.

I'm only human.

So am I, I'm only very human.

Anyone for Hicksville?

(calming music)

They've never slept so late.

Maybe they're dead.

I don't think so.

We're ready when you are Laura.

Do you want this, it was

on the bathroom door.

[Laura] Throw it out.

[Walter Junior] Give

it to me, a souvenir.

[Doris] We'll wait in the car.

[Laura] Okay.

Good morning.

Morning.

Oh you're not leaving.

Any minute, your breakfast is ready.

We thought you were dead.

What's this?

I'm paying up.

Oh, thank you.

For everything.

You know, I really shouldn't take this,

but I'd never forgive myself if I didn't.

I'd never forgive you either.

I'm sorry you lost the bet.

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