Learning New Things About Ourselves

[Thomas]:
New Sanders Sides time now!

*clicks remote*

-Heavy Metal Music-

[Thomas]:
♪ MY MOM ALWAYS COMES IN MY ROOM WITHOUT KNOCKING- ♪

[Thomas]:
Oh my gosh, um… That was uh, that was an old college band I was in. Okay, here are here we go right here!

*clicks remote*

*new scene*

[Thomas]:
Before we start the video, I'm starting a second channel!

[Joan]:
YAY!

[Thomas]:
Oh my gosh, where did you come from? Where did you go? I'm gonna talk a little bit more about that, but if you don't care you can skip to this time signature. It's called "Thomas Sanders..."

[Joan]:
"And Friends".

[Thomas]:
"And Friends", yes.

[Joan]:
And- but- not... Not just me.

[Thomas]:
No, more than just you. Which is cool. Friends, plural. And it's where I'm gonna be posting our unscripted content from here on out, as well as our short video compilations- -sneezes and ducks out-

*Joan rises back in wiping nose and wearing Thomas’ shirt*

[Joan]:
Excuse me. So, I'm sure you're all wondering what you're gonna see on this other channel, well I'll show you! Oh my gosh, Awkward Adventures! Voices of Unreason! Tweet Tunes, we haven't seen that one in a little while! Oh, yeah, there's the reactions. Yeah, everyone watches those. We're also gonna try some new things out too-

[Thomas]:
Give me my shirt back!

[Joan]:
I'm sorry-

[Thomas]:
*ahem* On this channel, we're gonna continue posting scripted content like Sanders Sides and Cartoon Therapy and also our music, so if you only like our scripted content, we won't be clogging your subscription feeds. If you only like our unscripted content, you can subscribe to our second channel. If you like both, you can subscribe to both, either/or/and! Our goal is to increase frequency of posting for both channels, so if you enjoyed all that fun off-the-cuff stuff we did on this channel be sure to subscribe to the new channel if you want to get more of that. Also stay tuned to the end to hear a special offer from this video sponsor Skillshare, as well as a look at a new piece of Sanders Sides merch.

*end scene*

[Thomas]:
Ok. Sorry. I don't know- I don't know what this is doing, but that was some sort of weird promo. I'm not sure. Ok, new Sander Sides now!

*clicks remote*

*sanders sides logo*

[Thomas]:
-seriously, while pouring wine- How do you do everyone? So, I figured we try something new for today. Rather than, deliver unto you a game of some kind or a silly escapade, you know those usual YouTube hijinks. I thought it might be nice to have an advanced, mature discussion about world events. So... The Israeli-Palestinian conflict- Woah, no, -sighs and ducks out- woo! I am sorry. I went right out the gate with a heavy subject matter that I have no idea about and maybe would have been irresponsible for me to talk about with any authority. Um… Okay, I am sorry. Hoo... To be honest, um… I've just been in kind of a weird place, uh, because of something that happened recently.

[Patton]:
You see, Thomas had recently eaten an old chicken wrap that had gone bad and-

[Thomas]:
NO! No, -nervous laughter- Patton that is not what I was referring to.

[Patton]:
Yeah, but-

[Thomas]:
Yeah, no, that was bad, but I was referring to that conversation I had the other day.

[Patton]:
Yeah, with your friend about the awful dia-

[Thomas]:
-LOGUE! That I had with another old friend I ran into last week.

[Patton]:
Oh...! I'll shut up about the diarrhea.

[Thomas]:
No-- -groans-

[Patton]:
I can't help but feel like I did something.

[Thomas]:
So basically, I hadn't seen this friend in a while, and he asked me what I did nowadays and I told him that I'm… doing YouTube. And then came a question that was -sigh- all too familiar... "Yeah, but what do you ACTUALLY do? Like for a living."

[Patton]:
Oh, yeah.

[Thomas]:
I know there's this whole stigma around social media and that it's looked at as just a hobby. And for many people it is! But you know for a lot of people it's their full-time gig. But it's still not taken seriously. I'm not taken seriously. And you know, I've had people ask me that question millions of times before, but for some reason, this time... I don't know- it just stuck with me. And I don't know why. And it also doesn't help with this whole funk I'm in...

[Patton]:
Aah!

[Thomas]:
Not the good kind of funk.

[Patton]:
Aww...

[Thomas]:
Yeah, and you know, it's not like I'm not being productive or not creating. It's just I haven't been satisfied. I don't feel content with my content. There are all these little things that for some reason are getting to me, but I feel bad… for feeling bad... because... I don't know I just feel bad.

[Patton]:
Oh, Thomas don't say that. Take it from me, that's not the way to work out your feelings.

[Thomas]:
But what even are my feelings right now? None of it makes sense! Nothing's different! Not that I know of. Okay, the only way I can describe it is, like, someone dumped a million billion… JILLION piece puzzle in front of me and you know, it's up to me to put it together. To figure out why I'm feeling this way.

[Patton]:
I can't even count that high...

[Thomas]:
Usually I go for the edge pieces first, you know, to help, like, frame it up and work inwards, but I can't find a frickin edge piece anywhere!

[Patton]:
So... we continue looking for our first edge piece!

[Thomas]:
Yeah, well for now, my feelings have to wait, because I have videos I have to make, even though nothing I create seems to be anything great.

[Roman]:
How dare you criticize my work while also utilizing my rhyming skills!? That's like -slaps self- slapping me in the face of my own beautifully manicured... SWORD! -kisses sword-

[Thomas]:
Oh, hi Roman.

[Roman]:
I'm sorry that everything I make isn't the Creation of Adam... Driver, with his perfectly huge pecs!

[Thomas]:
No, I'm not saying that I just- I don't know what I want.

[Roman]:
Well, maybe we should just take some time to explore what it is we want.

[Logan]:
You know, we can't do that Roman.

[Patton]:
Logan! It's Patton!

[Logan]:
Thomas made a commitment to regularly sharing content. He must be held accountable.

[Roman]:
-sigh- Is this really a time to be harping on due dates, Teach?

[Logan]:
This isn't just about my regard for punctuality although I am overcome by a titillating, tingly sensation whenever deadlines are met.

[Roman]:
Eww.

[Logan]:
If we continually fail to deliver videos in a timely manner or even fail to deliver them entirely, then... Uh... -looks at flashcard- By the screams of snipped snakes at a Gorgon salon, why would the audience remain?... What?

[Roman]:
Oh, that's one of mine.

[Logan]:
Ah...

[Roman]:
Thank you-- I DON'T KNOW why the viewers would stick around! They certainly aren't doing it to hear you talking about them so belittlingly.

[Logan]:
Belittlingly? How is treating their time as valuable belittling them. (To Viewers) Are you feeling belittled? Comment below if you're feeling belittled.

[Roman]:
Don't bring them into this. How dare you! (To Viewers) Sorry, everyone! Pardon Logan's rude behavior... and make sure to ring that bell.

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