Learning New Things About Ourselves Page #5

[Roman]:
Patton, -snaps- stay with us.

[Patton]:
Sorry. Boy, I really MILKED that bit. Wacka Wacka!

[Roman]:
What I think Patton was trying to say is that Logan has just proven that he's the worst and that he's been the thorn in your side all along.

[Virgil]:
Could you even contribute like an ounce of constructive input to our conversation today, Doctor Do-the-Most?

[Roman]:
Okay, why don't you just go get lost in a dryer?

[Virgil]:
You know Roman, it's too bad your brain isn't as big as that chin.

[Roman]:
Well, you smell like FOOT!

[Thomas]:
Roman.

[Roman]:
No, Thomas, I know. That wasn't helpful. In truth, I do feel bad.

[Thomas]:
You do?

[Roman]:
...Yes.

[Virgil]:
Well then maybe you should say you're sorry.

[Roman]:
You're right.

[Virgil]:
Oh really?

[Roman]:
Logan.

[Virgil]:
Okay.

[Roman]:
Earlier. I made you angry. I do that quite a bit actually... I provoked you and you retaliated with violence. (Under breath) Like a stupid caveman. But! I am responsible for my actions and my actions alone. So, I'm sorry.

[Logan]:
Oh, well, that's... very kind.

[Roman]:
Okay, well I gave that a shot. I still feel bad.

[Patton]:
Well, why not try expressing your feelings in a way that makes sense for you!

[Roman]:
Well, that might work. Let's see... -clears throat- Maestro?

(Music plays)

[Logan]:
Oh, uh what? No...

[Roman]:
♪ So, you've gone and called someone stupid... And in response, they damaged your eye. But there is where the conflict must end. Lest you both end up blind. ♪

[Logan]:
Another song? Really?

[Roman]:
♪ Sometimes the problems at play are not all plain to see. So, we lash out at our loved ones disregarding our bonds' sanctity! ♪

[Patton]:
♪ There are several sides to us that may seem abstract at first until we discover where everything fits and... People can be like a half-missing puzzle set. As we find the pieces, things make more and more sense! ♪

[Thomas]:
Nice imagery, but I'm not sure I follow...

[Patton]:
Well, I'll give you an example... I had this problem where I'd often hide my less-than-awesome feelings so when I would feel like sobbing, I'd just smile and crack jokes! I thought that that was coping. Only joking, never showing sadness, hoping it would go away.

[Logan]:
Did that work?

[Patton]:
Nope! ♪ I felt bad. ♪

[Roman]:
Aw, Pat...

[Patton]:
♪ It's okay! ♪

[Thomas]:
How's that?

[Patton]:
♪ Everybody gets sad. Even dads that have people to care for! And therefore, you don't have to hide your pain. Life without rainy days is incomplete! ♪ Or, like, not even a thing, ya know? Rain goes to plants, plants feed animals, plant-eating animals feed animal eating animals, and humans feed animals corn and inject them with hormones until they can barely walk anymo-

[Thomas]:
Patton?

[Patton]:
Yes?

[Thomas]:
How does all that relate to rain?

[Patton]:
Oh, right, rainy days. Forgot what I was talking about! Um, putting it simply, rain is a necessary piece of the puzzle that is... uh life.

[Logan]:
(Unenthusiastically) So true... Are we done singing or is this just one of those musical interludes-

[Virgil]:
On the subject of storm clouds... Cause, ya know... you need storm clouds to make... rain--I'm just gonna get into it. -clears throat- You once knew me as real gloomy. This weird, spooky, broody dude because I knew you'd listen to me as too scary to ignore. I thought that I could take it, all the hate could just be shaken, but when you lo... CARE for someone, not much hurts more than their scorn. I also felt bad.

[Roman]:
Come now...

[Virgil]:
♪ In a different way. ♪

[Thomas]:
Different how?

[Virgil]:
♪ By "bad", I mean, well, "mean", but I did what I thought that I had to... which is bad, too! I don't have to act all tough. ♪

[Thomas]:
♪ Sometimes love is enough. ♪

[Patton]:
♪ Or what we need! ♪

[Logan]:
That was a quaint little review of things that we already knew. Now, can our discourse resume? There's pressing matters at hand.

[Thomas]:
Actually, that was for your benefit.

[Logan]:
I don't see how THAT could be relevant.

[Patton]:
Logan, please!

[Thomas]:
Our goal's benevolent.

[Logan]:
You know me, I don't care for sentiment.

[Roman]:
OMG!

[Logan and Thomas]: This just serves as testament to the fact that

[Logan]:
to me you're negligent,

[Thomas]:
you have a temperament,

[Both]:
which is fine.

[Logan]:
It just works to your detriment, you not letting me finish is proving my-

[Thomas]:
You just haven't accepted it, if you'd let them finish, they'd get to the-

[Virgil]:
Hey!

[Virgil]:
♪ You're lost. ♪

[Logan]:
I'm right here.

[Virgil]:
♪ It's okay. ♪

[Logan]:
You're acting weird...

[Virgil]:
♪ I was lost once, too, but thanks to all of you, life sucks less now. ♪

[Thomas, Roman, and Patton]: ♪ We're your best pals! ♪

[Virgil]:
♪ No one wants to be a joke- ♪

[Thomas, Roman, and Patton]: But a life free of jokes is incomplete!

[Roman]:
Oh my gosh guys, if we're airing out our dirty laundry, would you mind if I participated?

[Thomas]:
By all means, sure!

[Roman]:
-hangs dirty socks on the line outside- Hmph. -goes back inside- I'd also like to contribute to this weird, venty song!

[Thomas]:
Please do.

[Roman]:
-clears throat- I've got an issue that feels new school. I don't want to say I'm too cool, but, I'm just too fab for you fools and I feel like you don't get me!

[Thomas]:
You insulted us WHILE venting.

[Roman]:
Uh, sorry!

[Thomas]:
It's alright, Princey. Honestly, it didn't hurt me. It's clear YOU'RE the one that's hurting.

[Roman]:
Huh?

[Virgil]:
♪ You feel low. ♪

[Roman]:
That's not true!

[Patton]:
♪ It's okay! ♪

[Roman]:
Don't assume!

[Thomas]:
♪ You don't need to save face. ♪

[Virgil]:
♪ In almost any case, ♪

[Patton and Virgil]: ♪ we embrace you. ♪

[Roman]:
That's rich...

[Virgil]:
♪ No one hates you. ♪

[Thomas, Virgil, and Patton]: ♪ Everybody's got flaws, ♪

[Thomas]:
♪ But with no you at all, I'm incomplete. ♪

[Patton and Virgil]: ♪ There! Now you see. ♪

[Patton, Roman, and Virgil]: ♪ Everybody goes wrong and we put it in song so it's easier to hear it. ♪

[Patton]:
♪ This puzzle's tough, I'll admit, but in time we'll find where everything fits. ♪

[Thomas]:
Wow. Guys, that... really helped me feel better.

[Logan]:
Wh- from th- how??

[Thomas]:
I don't know. I don't have all of my feelings worked out, but I don't know if that would have been reasonable to expect. Although... now I know where some of the issues are originating from.

[Roman]:
-sighs- Me too.

[Logan]:
Oh, DO you Roman?

[Roman]:
They're originating with... me. -sigh- Logan, I know that I act like I'm not concerned with schedules or numbers or anything, but I am! I know that we have a responsibility and I want everything to be the best it can be. It's just…

[Patton]:
Keep going, Roman...

[Roman]:
-sighs- It's so hard to create anything that I'm proud of when it's critiqued, so harshly... by you.

[Logan]:
What?

[Roman]:
Nothing ever seems to be good enough, professional enough... Serious enough for you.

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