Legally Blonde Page #24

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Emmett hides a smile. Warner leans over to Elle. Sarah is

nearby, listening. ·

WARNER:

(quietly)

If you tell him, you'll probably make

summer associate. Who cares.about Brooke?

Think about yourself.

ELLE:

I gave her my word, Warner.

Sarah watches -- seeing both Warner and Elle in a different

light.

Donovan storms back in.

DONOVAN:

The ex-wife seems to be unconcerned with

the fact that her interview is today.

She's at a spa in the Berkshires.

GERARD:

A spa?

(to Elle)

Isn't that like, your Mother-Ship?

Elle shrugs and looks at Donovan.

ELLE .

I can go if you want.

ENID:

Why you?

GERARD:

(to Enid)

Have you ever been to a spa?

ENID:

And subscribe to the doctrine of self-

hatred imposed upon my gender by male

delusions of the way women are supposed

to look?

(beat) .

Twice.

Donovan motions toward Elle. Then looks at Emmett with a

pointed "Get the alibi" look.

(CONTINUED)

79.

95 (3) 95

DONOVAN:

Go with her.

96 INT. EMMETT'S VOLVO - DAY 96

Emmett drives, Elle is shotgun.

ELLE:

Explain to me why you're so anti- Brooke.

EMMETT:

Uh, for starters, she won'-t give us an

al i bi --

ELLE:

Aside from that.

EMMETT:

She's completely untrustworthy.

ELLE:

Why?

EMMETT:

She married an old man, she's made a

living on telling women they're too fat,

she hawks her crap on the Home Shopping

Network...

ELLE:

A) He's an old man with a really big

penis. B) She never told me I was fat.

And C) Victoria Principal sells on that

network.

EMMETT:

And D) Brooke is obviously hiding

something.

ELLE:

But maybe it's not what you think.

EMMETT:

Bu t maybe it is-- .

They're quiet for a moment. She looks at him.

ELLE:

You're kind of being a butt-head right

now.

(CONTINUED)

80.

96 96

EMMETT:

(amused)

How do you figure?

ELLE:

Because people aren't always what they

seem to be and you refuse to see that.

Have a little faith. You might be

surprised.

They're quiet again while he thinks about this. He looks

over at her.

EMMETT:

I can't believe you called me a butt-

head. No one's called me a butt-head

since ninth grade.

ELLE:

Maybe not to your face...

She gives him a teasing smile. He smiles back at her,

shaking his head.

97 INT. SPA - LOBBY - DAY 97

Elle and Emmett are at the desk.

ELLE:

We have two o'clock massages. Kerrigan

and Woods.

DESK CLERK:

Go on back. .

Elle starts to go, then stops.

ELLE:

Oh, and my friend Katherine Windham

Vandermark is here somewhere and I ' m

supposed to meet her. for a Pilates class.

Do you have her schedule?

DESK CLERK:

(checking)

She's in the mud room until four.

Elle smiles her thanks and walks off with Emmett.

EMMETT:

Damn. We can't see her for an hour?

(CONTINUED)

81.

97 97

ELLE:

No, she can't move for an hour.

She grabs his arm and pulls him down the hall.

98 INT. SPA - MUD ROOM - DAY 98

MRS. WINDHAM VANDERMARK, late 40s, brunette, East Coast hoity-

t o i t y -- lies on a table like a corpse, stiff with mud,

cucumbers over her eyes. Elle and Emmett poke their heads in.

ELLE:

Mrs. Windham Vandermark?

EMMETT:

We're here from Austen, Platt, Jaret &

Donovan --

MRS. WINDHAM VANDERMARK

So, you found me.

Emmett looks at Elle.

EMMETT:

(sotto)

She's naked.

MRS. WINDHAM VANDERMARK

I ' m covered in very expensive Egyptian

mud ··-- hardly naked.

ELLE:

(to Emmett)

I'll cover her -- parts.

Elle settles on three washcloths, strategically placed.

MRS. WINDHAM VANDERMARK

So, I hear the tart from California shot -

Heyworth.

EMMETT:

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