Legally Blondes
Come on, Annie.
Don't be such a slowcoach.
I'm going as fast as I can.
Excuse me. So sorry.
- Excuse us.
- Slow down, Izzy.
We're shopping, not playing a rugby match.
There's Iess bruising in rugby, Annie.
We're talking summer clearance.
Things can get a bit brutal.
Imagine, summer clothes all year round.
No more jumpers and wellies for us.
And I've heard that in LA,
we'll only need these to block out the sun.
The sun? Living in this country,
you wouldn't know there was a sun.
Sale!
Blast! Some twit put this on the wrong rail.
It's not half-price.
Blonde rule number one.
Pink Iooks good with anything.
Blonde rule number two.
Never pay retail.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
- Flip.
- And wave.
Excuse me.
- Yes?
- Nigel.
Such a regal name.
But this garment
seems to be hung incorrectly.
- It was on the half-price rail.
- Oh.
I do hope we can make right
what is clearly an injustice.
Brilliant! You're a natural barrister, Izzy.
Even I almost bought your argument.
I don't argue, Annie. I persuade.
MR. WOODS:
Have you Iovelies finished packing?
Almost!
Annie, I can't believe we're Ieaving
for cousin EIIe's tomorrow.
There. Everything color-coded.
Me, too. This box is Iabeled...
Pink.
I miss Mum, Izzy.
I can't believe it's been two years
since we Iost her.
I miss Mum, too, Annie.
I wonder how we'll get on in California.
Things have been so gray in this flat
since Mum died.
I hope the sunny climate
will help Dad move on.
And up. He'll be running the entire
LAU English Department in no time.
Talking behind my back, are we?
No, we're just excited for the move.
Look, I know this move isn't easy.
And I appreciate your support.
It'll be fun. We'll see movie stars,
drink those mocha-Iatte-ccinos,
and get authentic Beverly Hills nose jobs.
- What?
- Just joking, Dad.
I'm partial to the English nose I have,
thank you very much.
Me, too. On both of you.
And have no fear.
The Woods team will fit in the LA Iifestyle
Iike fish fit with chips.
This is my Iife
I'm on my own
Don't need anyone
To guide me down the road
I'm finding out who
Yeah, who I wanna be
This is me
This is my Iife
I'm in control
Moving so fast
I'm shouting out
Who, yeah, who do you see?
MR. WOODS:
Wow, Iook at that!These are houses?
Are you sure
this is the way to EIIe's house?
MR. WOODS:
Those Yanks Iove their horns,don't they?
Anyway, girls,
I start teaching tomorrow at university
just a mile
from EIIe's Hollywood Hills mansion.
Wow, Izzy, Beverly Hills
sure is different from back home.
Look at these cars.
Speaking of cars, tell us again
why we shipped in our Mini
from across the pond?
What? She's a peach.
Wrong side of the road, Dad!
Wrong side of the road!
AII right.
I'll have to try to remember that.
MR. WOODS:
Here we are, girls!It's a palace.
Welcome to your new home, girls.
My, this place is awfully pink.
So, it is quite a step up
from the old, musty flat back home, eh?
This is a step up from Buckingham Palace.
Best of all, it doesn't cost a penny.
Cousin EIIe spends most of her time
back in DC, Iobbying.
So she's Iet us, for now, squat here.
Take it over.
- It's Iike a dream.
- Oh, I suppose I can get used to it.
Do you think you could get used to this?
EIIe has quite the view, eh?
Can it get any better?
That sounds Iike Bruiser.
Bruiser! Times two.
They're so sweet.
Hello, pretty boys. Hey.
Oh, Iook. From cousin EIIe.
"Dear Isabelle and Annabelle,
"sorry I couldn't be there to greet you,
"but Bruiser's Iittle nephews,
Spike and Butch,
"will welcome you with open paws.
"Always blonde, cousin EIIe."
Oh, how thoughtful.
Well, I'm sorry, girls,
but under no circumstances
are either of you to even consider
returning those dogs.
We'll walk with the dogs
and explore our new hood.
Hood?
And we'll shop
for our first-day-of-school ensembles.
Girls, there's something
I've been meaning to tell you.
It's amazing here, Dad. Love you.
Love you. Bye.
Oh-oh, oh-oh, one, two, three
- Annie, Iook at all these stores!
- It's fashion paradise.
It's so different from Kentfield.
That dress is perfect.
Rockin' to my own beat
Never stuck on repeat
I'm singing my own song
Beverly Hills isn't very hilly.
But the sun is sunnier.
The hunks are hunkier.
And the junk food's organic.
- Oh, my God, it's Karen!
- Who?
I've read about it
in the finest couture magazines.
The holy grail of high-end runway apparel.
And now it stands before us, beckoning.
Posh practically summers inside that shop.
Last time I checked,
Becksy's shopping budget
was north of ours by about 40 zeroes.
A salesperson's a salesperson, Izzy.
Do what you do best. Persuade.
Therefore, Evette...
Such a dynamic name.
...even though the stitching is subpar,
the color is off by at Ieast one shade
from the designer's runway prototype,
I'm still willing
to negotiate a reasonable price
on behalf of my sister
that would benefit both parties.
I can see you're a very reasonable person.
You'll have to forgive me, Iadies.
We get an awful Iot
of television celebrities in this store.
- Oh, oh, we're not...
- Oh, no, no. Oh, wait.
Yes, yes, of course.
You're the Riffraff Twins.
Loved the show.
We always say that the world
can certainly use a Iittle more riffraff,
but I'm afraid in this store,
sadly, you're canceled.
Come back when you can pay full price
Iike big people.
- Well, that went swimmingly.
- Like the Titanic.
Evette just did us a favor.
I mean,
she's just telling us we can do better.
We're in the greatest fashion shopping
postal code in the world.
Somewhere on these hallowed streets
is a school wardrobe
that's gonna make the world
stand up and say...
Crap!
MR. WOODS:
I'm sorry, Ioves.You never gave me a chance to tell you.
Pac Prep requires uniforms.
This is as scratchy as tweed.
A sack of potatoes has more panache!
And not a thread of pink. It's criminal.
Downright oppressive.
What sort of school are you sending us to?
LA? More Iike we Ianded in Oz.
MR. WOODS:
This isone of the best schools in the States.
And now, of course,
it's an even better school
because you two are attending.
Forget it, Dad.
These posh kids Iook Iike
they just came off an assembly Iine.
MR. WOODS:
Come on, girls,I'm trying hard here.
Let's see some smiles.
Anything for you, Dad.
AII right. Here we are.
Okay, Iovelies. Stiff upper Iips.
And Iet's see some cheery faces, eh?
Give us a kiss. Oh, thank you.
Now, just remember,
be your Ioveable, adorable selves,
and I promise you that, by my watch,
you'll have met
your first friend in three, two...
I'm not here to be your friend.
I'm only here to educate you.
Welcome, Iadies, to Pacific Preparatory.
I'm Headmistress Higgins.
I see here that, from past performance,
as well as your father's
somewhat Iimited financial resources,
you've both been admitted on scholarship.
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"Legally Blondes" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 13 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/legally_blondes_12389>.
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