Legally Blondes

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Come on, Annie.

Don't be such a slowcoach.

I'm going as fast as I can.

Excuse me. So sorry.

- Excuse us.

- Slow down, Izzy.

We're shopping, not playing a rugby match.

There's Iess bruising in rugby, Annie.

We're talking summer clearance.

Things can get a bit brutal.

I reckon it's worth it.

Imagine, summer clothes all year round.

No more jumpers and wellies for us.

And I've heard that in LA,

we'll only need these to block out the sun.

The sun? Living in this country,

you wouldn't know there was a sun.

Sale!

Blast! Some twit put this on the wrong rail.

It's not half-price.

Blonde rule number one.

Pink Iooks good with anything.

Blonde rule number two.

Never pay retail.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

- Flip.

- And wave.

Excuse me.

- Yes?

- Nigel.

Such a regal name.

But this garment

seems to be hung incorrectly.

- It was on the half-price rail.

- Oh.

I do hope we can make right

what is clearly an injustice.

Brilliant! You're a natural barrister, Izzy.

Even I almost bought your argument.

I don't argue, Annie. I persuade.

MR. WOODS:

Have you Iovelies finished packing?

Almost!

Annie, I can't believe we're Ieaving

for cousin EIIe's tomorrow.

There. Everything color-coded.

Me, too. This box is Iabeled...

Pink.

I miss Mum, Izzy.

I can't believe it's been two years

since we Iost her.

I miss Mum, too, Annie.

I wonder how we'll get on in California.

Things have been so gray in this flat

since Mum died.

I hope the sunny climate

will help Dad move on.

And up. He'll be running the entire

LAU English Department in no time.

Talking behind my back, are we?

No, we're just excited for the move.

Look, I know this move isn't easy.

And I appreciate your support.

It'll be fun. We'll see movie stars,

drink those mocha-Iatte-ccinos,

and get authentic Beverly Hills nose jobs.

- What?

- Just joking, Dad.

I'm partial to the English nose I have,

thank you very much.

Me, too. On both of you.

And have no fear.

The Woods team will fit in the LA Iifestyle

Iike fish fit with chips.

This is my Iife

I'm on my own

Don't need anyone

To guide me down the road

I'm finding out who

Yeah, who I wanna be

This is me

This is my Iife

I'm in control

Moving so fast

To where I wanna go

I'm shouting out

Who, yeah, who do you see?

MR. WOODS:
Wow, Iook at that!

These are houses?

Are you sure

this is the way to EIIe's house?

MR. WOODS:
Those Yanks Iove their horns,

don't they?

Anyway, girls,

I start teaching tomorrow at university

just a mile

from EIIe's Hollywood Hills mansion.

Wow, Izzy, Beverly Hills

sure is different from back home.

Look at these cars.

Speaking of cars, tell us again

why we shipped in our Mini

from across the pond?

What? She's a peach.

Wrong side of the road, Dad!

Wrong side of the road!

AII right.

I'll have to try to remember that.

MR. WOODS:
Here we are, girls!

It's a palace.

Welcome to your new home, girls.

My, this place is awfully pink.

So, it is quite a step up

from the old, musty flat back home, eh?

This is a step up from Buckingham Palace.

Best of all, it doesn't cost a penny.

Cousin EIIe spends most of her time

back in DC, Iobbying.

So she's Iet us, for now, squat here.

Take it over.

- It's Iike a dream.

- Oh, I suppose I can get used to it.

Do you think you could get used to this?

EIIe has quite the view, eh?

Can it get any better?

That sounds Iike Bruiser.

Bruiser! Times two.

They're so sweet.

Hello, pretty boys. Hey.

Oh, Iook. From cousin EIIe.

"Dear Isabelle and Annabelle,

"sorry I couldn't be there to greet you,

"but Bruiser's Iittle nephews,

Spike and Butch,

"will welcome you with open paws.

"Always blonde, cousin EIIe."

Oh, how thoughtful.

Well, I'm sorry, girls,

but under no circumstances

are either of you to even consider

returning those dogs.

We'll walk with the dogs

and explore our new hood.

Hood?

And we'll shop

for our first-day-of-school ensembles.

Girls, there's something

I've been meaning to tell you.

It's amazing here, Dad. Love you.

Love you. Bye.

Oh-oh, oh-oh, one, two, three

- Annie, Iook at all these stores!

- It's fashion paradise.

It's so different from Kentfield.

That dress is perfect.

Rockin' to my own beat

Never stuck on repeat

I'm singing my own song

Beverly Hills isn't very hilly.

But the sun is sunnier.

The hunks are hunkier.

And the junk food's organic.

- Oh, my God, it's Karen!

- Who?

The Karen Glass Studio.

I've read about it

in the finest couture magazines.

The holy grail of high-end runway apparel.

And now it stands before us, beckoning.

Posh practically summers inside that shop.

Last time I checked,

Becksy's shopping budget

was north of ours by about 40 zeroes.

A salesperson's a salesperson, Izzy.

Do what you do best. Persuade.

Therefore, Evette...

Such a dynamic name.

...even though the stitching is subpar,

the color is off by at Ieast one shade

from the designer's runway prototype,

I'm still willing

to negotiate a reasonable price

on behalf of my sister

that would benefit both parties.

I can see you're a very reasonable person.

You'll have to forgive me, Iadies.

We get an awful Iot

of television celebrities in this store.

- Oh, oh, we're not...

- Oh, no, no. Oh, wait.

Yes, yes, of course.

You're the Riffraff Twins.

Loved the show.

We always say that the world

can certainly use a Iittle more riffraff,

but I'm afraid in this store,

sadly, you're canceled.

Come back when you can pay full price

Iike big people.

- Well, that went swimmingly.

- Like the Titanic.

Evette just did us a favor.

I mean,

she's just telling us we can do better.

We're in the greatest fashion shopping

postal code in the world.

Somewhere on these hallowed streets

is a school wardrobe

that's gonna make the world

stand up and say...

Crap!

MR. WOODS:
I'm sorry, Ioves.

You never gave me a chance to tell you.

Pac Prep requires uniforms.

This is as scratchy as tweed.

A sack of potatoes has more panache!

And not a thread of pink. It's criminal.

Downright oppressive.

What sort of school are you sending us to?

LA? More Iike we Ianded in Oz.

MR. WOODS:
This is

one of the best schools in the States.

And now, of course,

it's an even better school

because you two are attending.

Forget it, Dad.

These posh kids Iook Iike

they just came off an assembly Iine.

MR. WOODS:
Come on, girls,

I'm trying hard here.

Let's see some smiles.

Anything for you, Dad.

AII right. Here we are.

Okay, Iovelies. Stiff upper Iips.

And Iet's see some cheery faces, eh?

Give us a kiss. Oh, thank you.

Now, just remember,

be your Ioveable, adorable selves,

and I promise you that, by my watch,

you'll have met

your first friend in three, two...

I'm not here to be your friend.

I'm only here to educate you.

Welcome, Iadies, to Pacific Preparatory.

I'm Headmistress Higgins.

I see here that, from past performance,

as well as your father's

somewhat Iimited financial resources,

you've both been admitted on scholarship.

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