Lennon Naked Page #2

Couldn't have put it better meself.

I know.

(HORN HONKING)

You're thinking,

"This is going to bring us closer."

You're thinking, "Brian's dead,

"John'll be sad

and it'll bring us closer."

-You don't know what I'm thinking.

-I do.

I just want to hold your hand.

JOHN:
"Dear Dad, Freddie,

Al Jolson, whatever.

"Thanks for the letter.

"I'm sitting down now. "

Done all right for himself, eh?

Don't worry, Les,

he's not going to steal the spoons.

-Are you?

-Are they hallmarked?

Blimey, John, what a place.

Do you like it?

And here's me, me sum total.

There's no need for this, mate.

-Keep it. Keep it.

-Come 'ead.

(IN AMERICAN ACCENT) Why, you think

you can pay me off to throw the fight?

All right. Inside, Rocky.

Where you putting me, then?

Cup of tea? Put the kettle on, Dot.

Tea? Champagne not called for?

-Do you think I'm made of money?

- (CHUCKLES)

Bigger than most of the hotels

I've worked in, this place.

I only ever sit in here.

Here and the studio.

Your own studio?

Jesus, John, when you think

where you started out.

I still am starting out.

Is that a pool?

(JULIAN CHATTERING OUTSIDE)

Are you happy, John?

I mean,

all this is a dream come true, isn't it?

Heated, you know.

But still, no drinks cabinet.

(JULIAN LAUGHING OUTSIDE)

So what's next, then, for the Fab Four?

I've had a lot of people die on me.

Never thought Brian would.

In the midst of life and all that, John.

Only the good die young, son.

What are you looking at?

Do you get that?

You laugh 'cause the other fella's dead

and not you.

You don't know what to feel.

There but for the grace of God.

People ask me,

"How do you feel about Brian? "

I don't know what to feel.

I feel like

I've stopped feeling anything.

Queen, was he?

What's that got to do with anything?

Nothing.

Knew a lot of them when I was at sea,

good blokes, most of them.

Had a letter from Uncle Charlie,

giving your side of the story.

All you've heard's the gospel

according to your Auntie Mimi,

starring me as Herod, Judas

and Pontius Pilate all rolled into one.

She brought me up.

So you can shut your mouth

on that score.

You treat all your houseguests

like this, do you?

I do if they dump me, aged six,

and don't come back for 1 7 years.

Like I said, what you've heard's

not the whole story.

No, you left it up to me.

Is that what you told me

last time I saw you?

I could do with

a bit of a lie-down, son.

You want to show us

where you're putting me?

Is this my grandson?

Who do you think this disreputable

old get is, Julian?

-A gardener?

-I'm your granddad.

Can you play football?

I'm talking with your dad, son.

Go on, make yourself useful.

Come on, then, give us a goal.

Ah! Goal! Oh, look at that!

Well done, son.

"Anyone who thought the Beatles

could do no wrong

"should be forced to watch

the Magical Mystery Tour

"and watch them fall flat on their faces

over 1 00 enervating minutes."

They don't know

what they're talking about.

I hope Paul's seen this.

Do you think Cynthia looks like

Brigitte Bardot, Dot?

Do you think my wife resembles

the famous French sex kitten?

She does, you see.

Mmm. She does,

only she's much better-looking.

-In what way?

-Ignore him, Dot.

Dot?

Well, her hair.

Her hair.

I'm going to be meeting Brigitte

when I get back from India.

So I'll be able to make

a proper comparison.

(DOOR SLAMS)

A gamekeeper run him down?

It was the chimney sweep who saw him.

He took him for an intruder.

Very brave of him, as it happens,

to apprehend him.

So rare these days that chimney sweeps

get the credit they deserve.

I could have called the police.

For that matter, I still can.

Then why don't you?

(SIGHS)

All right?

All right, John, glad to see you.

What are you doing, you stupid sod?

I was trying to find a boozer,

took a bit of a shortcut.

Come on.

I thought this was a path.

Do you think I've got nothing better

to do than babysit you?

That's a laugh, I hardly ever see you.

Oh, is that what this is about?

Oh, well, I'm sorry, John,

if I've embarrassed you

in front of your snooty

sodding neighbours.

But where you live is a maze,

there's not a boozer for miles.

I'm rattling around

in that house of yours

on me own half the time.

Feel like the nutter in the attic.

I like people around me, John.

You know, I want to have a good time.

Well, you've come to the wrong place.

So what are you doing here?

Get in the car.

Get in the car.

I've met someone, John.

-That's where I was going, to see her.

-Sod off, then.

She's 1 9.

-You're 54.

-I know.

I keep saying to her, go find yourself

some young good-looking fella

but she won't have it.

-What's her name?

-Pauline.

I hope I'm still shagging

You're a Lennon, aren't you?

I am, yeah, and you're a dirty old goat.

(CHUCKLES)

She's the reason I was thinking

about getting me own place, John.

Doesn't have to be far.

Ah, come on, John!

-You know as well...

-You're putting it on me again?

You what?

F***ing off and saying it was my fault?

I never said it was your fault, John.

Not now and not then. I said...

Talk to the office,

they'll sort you out.

TV REPORTER:
Infinite happiness,

Maharishi insists,

Iies deep within everyone.

He doesn't require you

to give anything up,

except drugs and a week's salary,

in the Beatles' case,

around $ 1 1, 000 apiece.

To attend this s, they have to have

a deep and clear experience of being.

(ALL CHATTERING)

Thank you very much for coming.

We've got a limited amount of time,

so if you keep your questions brief,

we'll try to get through

as many of you as possible. Yes.

Yeah, why did you come back from India

in such a hurry?

Well, the plane wouldn't fly any slower.

JOHN:
It was a mistake.

-What do you mean a mistake?

-We made a mistake.

Do you think other people are making

a mistake to go and see him now?

That's up to them.

How would you characterise your mistake?

We're human, you know, that's all.

We thought there was more to him

than there was, you know.

We thought... But he's just human.

And for a while we thought

he wasn't, you know.

We thought he was, you know...

You know...

Do you have any new

philosophical leaders?

JOHN:
No.

JOURNALIST:
Can we get on to Apple,

that's what we've come here to...

Why Apple Corps?

We just thought, what shall we call it?

Apple, Apple Corps.

It's a play on words.

Is business a subject for humour?

Anything's a subject for humour.

-Death?

-Your death.

-Why are you here today?

-To do this.

-What is this?

-What's it look like?

It looks like a shambles.

Well, you know, what are you here for?

What is the Apple Corps

function that you initiate?

It's business.

It's a business concerning records,

films and electronics,

and as a sideline,

whatever it's called,

manufacturing or whatever.

But we just want to set up a system

whereby people who want to

make a film about anything

don't have to go on their knees

in somebody's office,

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