Lies And Illusions Page #2

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a hard time getting motivated.

That would get me motivated

right there.

Nah. She doesn't really look

like the relationship type.

Who said anything

about a relationship?

All you need is to go...

in and out.

It's actually a good possible title.

Remind me to write that down.

Look, it's time for you to start

thinking about casual dating again.

- Yeah, I'll start thinking about it.

- You'd better start thinking about it!

Because I literally live vicariously

through you. If you're not having sex,

I'm not having sex. I'm getting

pretty f***ing horny over here.

I can tell.

A couple of nights out

with some chicks like this

will straighten you right out.

You can maybe have that one

or that one.

Hi.

Hi.

As a motivational speaker, you really

leave something to be desired.

You just gotta give me some time.

I know it's been a year,

but I was really madly in love

with Sam. It's how it is.

I'm not asking you to stop

thinking about her.

I'm just saying

every guy needs a little...

I'm taking care of myself.

Sure you do. All right,

I'm gonna go have a smoke

- and leave you with some people.

- I thought you quit.

Ah, good health is only gonna

keep me in bad marriage.

Yeah. Hello.

Wes-- Wes Wilson.

There we go.

Good luck finding love

in the 21st century.

Hi.

Thank you.

Oh! Excuse me. I'm sorry.

Whoa, hey! God.

Everybody okay?

- Okay, yeah.

- No, I'm fine.

Pick up a few of these things.

I'm Wes.

I am Nicole

and I know who you are.

Of course, well, there's a huge

standee of me there.

Look,

I'm just gonna put it right there.

I am a big fan

and I write for the Seattle

"Woman's Book Weekly"

and I would just love

to do an interview with you.

Oh, well, thank you very much.

I'm flattered.

You're welcome. Not many writers

get a best-seller their first time out.

Ah, beginner's luck.

I read it twice.

Some really good stuff in there.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

So did it help?

Are you married?

- Uh, no-- no wife.

- Girlfriend?

No-no, just me...

all alone.

- So what's wrong with you?

- Pretty much everything.

It doesn't look like it from here.

Uh, thank you.

Step right up.

Uh, so the interview?

Does this weekend work?

I'm kind of busy

this weekend, actually.

- What about tonight?

- Tonight?

- Well--

- No time like the present.

Here's my address.

Um, okay. Yeah, tonight.

Tonight could be good.

Great.

So we meet around 7:00?

- 7:
00! 7:00. Nice to meet you.

- Okay. Nice to meet you.

- Hi there.

- Hi.

There you go.

Good luck.

- Hello, sir.

- Hello.

Your book is very inspirational.

I've always said

it's not just for women.

I was in a relationship--

well, I thought I was in a relationship.

But then I read your book.

It was like you opened up

my mind and my eyes

- and I saw things in a whole new light.

- Thank you very much.

This girl I was seeing, well--

she wasn't the girl

I thought she was.

Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

What happened?

She just disappeared.

Uh, well, would you

like me to sign it?

I can dedicate the book,

if you like.

I want you to make it out

to my new girlfriend.

- Okay.

- Audrey.

I want you to put, "Diamonds

are a girl's best friend..."

"Diamonds are...

a girl's best friend.

Wes Wilson."

There you go.

I'll make sure

this one doesn't disappear.

Nice, huh?

Fan base is expanding.

This is big. This is really big.

Hello?

Hello?

Dude, I know you're there,

sitting there watching the machine

as I talk, little bastard.

Look, remember, this is just

an interview with a super hot girl

with a super hot body,

all right?

Just have fun.

Maybe she'll inspire you.

Don't forget to tell me all about it.

- You know I love this sh*t.

- All right.

- Wes?

- Hi.

You can see me? Hi.

- Come on up.

- What do I push?

Hi.

How long have you been

out there?

Feels like my whole life.

You wanna come in?

- Sure. Yeah.

- Come in. Get out of the rain.

Well, let me get you

out of these clothes here.

Don't you think we should talk first?

- I mean--

- You'll find a robe behind my door.

- Are we going out though?

- It's a mess outside.

I thought we'd stay in.

Okay.

Oh, gosh.

- It's a nice place you have here.

- Thanks. It's a rental.

- What?

- You in that robe.

Oh. It's cozy.

- Let's open some wine.

- Thank you.

- I take it you don't date much, huh?

- It's been a little while.

Is there a reason?

Uh, well, it's kind of a long story.

I was in this, um--

uh, well, I'm writing

a new book and--

- Oh, really? What is it about?

- I don't know.

Hey, you should laugh.

I'm completely lost-- writer's block.

- Well, you know what they say.

- What do they say?

- Write what you know.

- I don't think

anybody would be too interested

in my dull life.

You'd be surprised. I mean,

my readers are sure interested.

Right, right, the interview.

After dinner...

when we're more relaxed.

Good?

Yummy.

So I didn't really wanna be a writer.

I wanted to be a teacher.

Yeah? Well,

what's something only your closest

friends would know about you?

I'm a hell of a dancer!

- Really?!

- Yeah.

I'll show you some love here.

Yeah, here we go.

Big moves.

Ready?

Okay. Hey, yep!

- Look at that-- skibbitydoo!

- Impressive.

Spinning! Oh, sh*t.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, I think I just hurt myself.

Okay, okay.

- Wes?

- Yeah?

Are you ever gonna

put your clothes back on?

No.

Well, in that case...

Whoa, easy.

Afraid I'll take advantage?

I'm horrified at the thought

of not remembering.

Oh, trust me, you'd remember.

All right, um,

I'll go get my notebook

and maybe your clothes.

What...

the hell?

Hi, Wes. The interview

we did was published today

and I'll bring home a copy for you.

I thought we could celebrate.

I'm gonna pick up some stuff tonight.

Do you want pasta or fish...

or I don't know,

maybe you wanna go out.

Maybe you're tired of my cooking.

Hello?

Are you there?

Wes?

Anyways we can decide later. All right,

I'll see you soon, honey. Goodbye, babe.

Oh, Jesus!

I forgot that stupid cat.

Hello?!

I have a gun.

Wes, where are you, buddy?

Yeah, I'm down here--

in the cellar.

Where are you, man?

Oh sh*t.

- I'm in here. Get in here!

- Yeah.

I got the check for the thing.

What the hell is this?

I have absolutely no idea. Sam got

this house from some little old guy.

As far as I know, she hated guns,

hated small spaces.

Maybe he was one

of those weapons wackos,

like the guys who sell knives on the

home-shopping network or something.

I think this is a little high tech

for that little old guy.

Somebody was just in here.

Sam, what the hell were you into?

Is there anything

you're not telling me, man?

I'm just as much in the dark

as you are.

What am I signing here?

It's just a release form.

And in it you will find

Samantha's death certificate,

an authorization letter

and the key to her safety deposit box.

You will need all 3

to gain access.

Also in there is the final papers

and the deed for your house.

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